Do I or don't I make her my bridesmaid?!!

I feel for you as not long back I was in a similar situation but with an actual friend who has been a friend for a few years. 3 months isn't that long to know someone and it's a bit naughty of your mum to mention it. I would have thought that your brothers girlfriend would have been a bit shocked to have been told she was going to be your bridesmaid as I would be if someone asked me after I'd known them 3 months...also she shouldn't take it as a sure thing because you haven't actually asked her. Can you talk to your brother about it and just explain the situation and say you don't really want a third bridesmaid and that it's nothing to do with her as a person, you just can't stretch your budget and would rather stick to the 2 you've got. Only you can make the decision but it sounds like you don't want her to be...and you can't just ask her for the sake of it. Who knows, they may split up before your wedding anyway, then that would be very awkward. You shouldn't feel guilty, it's your day and you should have whoever you want. Hope you sort it out x

That's just the type of thing my mum would do! What are they like?!

I also think you have not known her long enough. She sounds lovely but it would be obvious you would be asking her through obligation and not because you genuinely care about her and want her to have a prominent role in the wedding, which is essentially what a BM is.

Talk to you mum and your brother.

I have a similar situation; I haven't asked FSIL to be a BM - I've known her a long time, but we rarely talk outside of family meet ups and have only met together a handful of times in 6 years. I have asked her girls to be my flower girls, and we'll get her to to a reading, but I didn't feel *right* asking her to be a BM

If you don't want her as one, don't have her.

You are correct, I wouldn't add another bridesmaid, 3 months is not a long time and they may be looking at flats but you never know what can happen. I guess that's the same about friends. It is your wedding you could try and include her in other ways so she doesn't feel left out.

Go with your gut - which is to not ask her. As others have said speak to your brother, so he'll tell her sensitively in case she was excited about it. If you haven't known her that long though, the likelihood would be that she'd know you were asking out of obligation, so won't be too bothered! I also didn't ask my FSIL (h2b's sister) as I have my own sister and already have four bridesmaids, I like her well enough but we're not close friends (she lives in Spain!) and would only have asked out of obligation. H2b spoke to her and she was absolutely fine with it, we're having her as a witness so she's still part of the wedding.

No, I wouldn't for all the reasons you mentioned. Plus you barely know her! Have the people you know and will support you on the day. Oh and have a word with your mum!

THIS^^ definitely!

would not recommend having someone you barely know!

She is probably thinking who is this crazy girl asking me to be a bridesmaid when she has only known me a couple of months!