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Beginner September 2017

Eloping - well kind of

LuxuriousBlueCars840, 1 June, 2017 at 13:31 Posted on Honeymoons & Getting Married Abroad 0

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My fiance & I had a venue booked in the UK for June 2018 but after a few things happening in our family we decided to get married sooner & abroad.

Last week we decided to get married in Sri Lanka just the 2 of us in September this year. It's all booked! We have told our parents & my fiance's best friend.

I have a very small family (5 people) but my fiance's family is a lot bigger (80+ people). I have a smaller friend circle too which makes things a little complicated.

My fiance wants all the things that come with a wedding - telling people we're going, having a large party when we get back, a stag do etc. This is making it seem less like an elopement.

I'm not too keen on telling people as I think we will get the same stresses as we would if we were getting married in the UK, people would always be talking about it & getting involved. I like the idea of it being our secret, just us.

I know that this is difficult as he will have his stag do (I doubt I will have a hen do) and he wants to invite people to the party.

I'm happy to have a party & I like the idea of celebrating after with people, showing them pictures etc but I'd like to keep it a secret until the day of the party. I understand it'll be difficult as we need to make sure people are free the day of the party. We are looking at the party being 3 weeks after we return from our wedding/honeymoon. Is this too late? I'm tempted to post invites the day we fly out (giving them 5 weeks notice).

Any advice?!

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Beginner July 2018
HappyOrangeFlowers814 · 21 July, 2017 at 20:38
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While I'm not in the same boat as you it's a very similar one. Currently my fiance and I, he's British and I'm American, are living in the US, but we'll be moving to the UK later this year. We are getting married at the courthouse here in a few months with just our parents and then will have 2 receptions in 2018, one in the US and one in the UK. It will be 9-10 months after we actually get married that we will have the receptions. Since we were going to be moving and having the majority of the people in we would invite to the wedding in the US we decided this way would be easier for us and for them.

We plan on telling everyone the plan, our engagement hasn't been made real public (i.e. Facebook official) yet. However my fiance doesn't want to tell people that we are getting married until after it actually happens as to not upset people. I on the other hand feel like people will understand and still be happy for us, and will be thankful they can still celebrate with us without having to fly halfway around the world.

You could send out the invites for the reception now, to give people a little more time but not tell them about the actual ceremony in Sri Lanka and keep that portion a surprise. Just say you're taking a little pre-wedding trip. I think that would be the best of both worlds, it's your little secret between you and your fiance, but people will still be able to plan for the party.

Congrats!!
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