Engagement party or no engagement party?

Congratulations! I agree with you. Put the money towards the wedding!

Personal choice! I didn't have one when I got engaged to my ex (long story, he was horrible and no one was at all pleased when we announced it!). This time I want something to mark the occasion as I am marrying the perfect man. We are just going to go for a few drinks with close friends and family so we can celebrate without spending too much.

We're having one! But we're eloping, so we want a way to celebrate with everyone.. with out them knowing.

We didn't bother. We got engaged last December and as we saw lots of people over Christmas and the New Year I couldn't be bothered to organise another party. Plus the money will be better spent on our wedding (in my opinion).

We didn't have a party but went to a nice hotel for afternoon tea with both our families, it was really nice and we had plenty of champagne ;-)

We didn't bother having a party.

We thought we would rather save the money & it's not like we've had a massively long engagement (1 year 9months).

We didn't have one, although my mum did insist on having several of her friends round with wine when we went up to check out the venue!

We got engaged about a month ago and are having a family party only near where we live (Surrey, but it's at OH's parents' house in Hampshire - I'm originally from Yorkshire though and don't want my Mum to feel left our so we've suggested we have one at her house too for her friends and mine up there who I don't see very often.

The family one is an afternoon tea kinda drop-in thing for a few hours with his cousins etc., and my Mum and brother are travelling down - much cheaper than hiring a hall etc and having a DJ - asking a few people to bring cakes, I'll make some cucumber sarnies and a few bottles of prosecco. After everyone's gone (around 6pm) his folks and my Mum and brother are going to the pub so they can get to know each other better.

No need for an expensive engagement party if you don't want it!!

We didn't have an engagement party, we just weren't too bothered! We'd been together 9 years when we got engaged, and lived together in our own house for 7, so it wasn't like our engagement was a huge surprise or anything for our families and friends. So we just didn't feel the need. And like you say, the money we would've spent will instead go towards the wedding.

We had an engagement party; it was lovely! We had it at my parents house and asked everyone to bring drinks but it still cost us a fair bit that could have gone towards the wedding but don't regret it one bit as it was such a good night!

Nope my wedding is my engagement party....

haha couldn't be bothered to plan two parties, one was more than enough for me!

Thankyou for your replies. We have decided to reserve a section of a local pub for 60 of our closest friends & family to have a drink with us & we will put some money behind the bar.

This sounds like a good plan. We had an engagement party but just reserved an area in a London bar and invited all of our friends. It cost no more than any other night out and we loved it. Was brilliant to have all out friends around. We then had a family bbq a couple of weeks later for our families to properly meet each other. Any excuse for a party in my book!

That sounds fab!

If I had done something it would have been similar to you.

Hi and congratulations!

We got engaged in July and had our engagement party in October. Have to say though, if I could go back I wouldn't have bothered! I ended up quite stressed out in the run up to it as hardly anybody RSVPd (kept imagining nobody would turn up), my hair and make up appointment ran over by an hour and a half, my dad told me I was "putting on the beef" when he first saw me that evening (sob!), and I just spent the whole evening running around making sure everyone was enjoying themselves. Hardly saw my OH as we were both circling, catching up with friends and relatives and even then I felt guilty I wasn't giving enough time to each person. I guess afterwards I just ended up dreading what the actual wedding would be like.......thinking about RSVPs, on-the-day preparations and dividing my time between my guests!

But I'm just a worrier by nature so I was always going to be stressed out!

Just do what you feel is best.....people will want to congratulate you, and everyone loves a good excuse for a party! xx