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Beginner May 2021 Hampshire

Father of the bride can no longer travel to wedding, what do we do?

Alexis, 28 July, 2020 at 11:04 Posted on Planning 0 2

Sorry this is a long post but I could use some advice. I’ve found myself in what seems like an impossible situation at the moment and I’m not sure what the right thing to do is. I’m from the US and my fiancé is from the U.K. Our wedding is taking place May 2021 and we’ve planned quite a bit for it already. It’s planned for the U.K. as he has a lot of friends and family here he wants at the wedding and my mother and grandfather now also live in the U.K. A few days ago, I found out my dad, who still lives in the US, is unlikely to be able to fly over because of illness. It’s breaking my heart thinking of not have my father there on my wedding day, especially as I get to see him so infrequently, and I’m his only child. I would be happy to cancel everything, buy all the immediate family flights and have a small wedding in my hometown, however, my fiancé’s mother also has a health condition and cannot ever fly again. Which means we have to have a wedding without one of our parents there. My fiancé wants to carry on with the wedding here without my dad and I wouldn't feel right planning something without his mum, but it seems unfair when my dad already misses so much and the father of the bride is such a key role on the day and since his mum has already gotten to go to one of her four children’s weddings. I’m tempted to plan a second, small ceremony in my hometown for my dad but not sure it would feel as special given the real ceremony would take place in the U.K. and he’d still feel left out, and we aren't sure we can afford it. Of course none of this might matter at all if the pandemic situation is still bad next year!

2 replies

Latest activity by Alaister, 5 August, 2020 at 20:34
  • K
    Beginner August 2020
    KateDPlanBWedding ·
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    What an awful situation to be in!!! I’d be tempted to have a small service in the US and then the big reception with a blessing here. But there are so many factors to consider I’m sure whatever you choose it will be a special time for you all.
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  • Alaister
    Beginner February 2015 West London
    Alaister ·
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    Well this is the way expected it to be, But don't feel sad you can do video conferencing he can see the wedding live and even you can also fix a screen, These times are hard but we need to adapt accordingly, Dont worry just deal with the siituation. Best WishesSmiley smile

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