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Vintagebluetulip
Beginner August 2021 Suffolk

Feeling deflated

Vintagebluetulip, 26 April, 2021 at 00:55 Posted on Planning 0 3
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This weekend I've lost all enthusiasm for my wedding. It's in August and most of my friends and family aren't coming for various reasons (health reasons, living abroad, family rifts, holidays booked, already busy that day etc). Yet my fiancée's side are all coming. One by one they have RSVPd no or I don't know yet I'm still deciding which isn't helpful. but we are only having a small wedding anyway so if ten people don't come it is a quarter of our whole guest list not coming. So far my sister, my auntie and uncle, cousin, 2 best friends and partners and my grandad. I just feel like I'm going to be upset on my big day when all these people aren't there. Just feel so fed up and wish we had just eloped. I'm still going through with the wedding because at the end of the day I want to be married. Has this happened to anyone else?

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Latest activity by Ben, 7 May, 2021 at 12:23
  • R
    Beginner July 2021 South East London
    Rosalind ·
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    I'm having this a bit. My fiance's family is huge. Mine is small and disjointed. My only family will be my brother, his kids, my mum, my dad and stepmum. My sister is not invited (we really don't get on), and my aunt and uncle on my dad's side just said they aren't coming. I'm heartbroken. My fiancee will have around 30 family members to my 6! And if Covid continues to play up then my dad and stepmum who live in France may not be able to come too. I don't have the answer but just feel for you, it sucks.
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  • Ebony
    Savvy May 2023 Lincolnshire
    Ebony ·
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    Our guest list is 80% my fiancé’s side, and then only 20% my side. I have a very small family and friends circle compared to him, and he is much closer to his extended family than I am to mine. It initially made me feel a bit sad, but then I remembered that we’re planning a day to celebrate our relationship and, ultimately, our two families will be joined into one big family at the end so it shouldn’t be a numbers competition between sides. Instead of focusing on the people who can’t come, or aren’t being helpful, try focusing on the guests who will be there celebrating your day with you. Those who aren’t coming are ultimately missing out on what I’m sure will be a fabulous day, and that’s their fault not yours.
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  • Vintagebluetulip
    Beginner August 2021 Suffolk
    Vintagebluetulip ·
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    Thanks for all your advice. I know you are right and I am trying to focus on the positives such as my parents being there etc. And as long as my fiance turns up on the day then that's all that matters! I think I just wanted to know if other people are in the same situation because it feels like it's just me going through this. Heartbroken is the exactly what I'm feeling now but hopefully the excitement will come back.
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