finalising guest list

I've never heard of anyone checking that guests who have said they are coming are still coming. You might need to chase up those who haven't confirmed nearer the time, but I don't think you can do that until shortly before your deadline.

View quoted message Thank you! You’re right, I’ve never been checked up again when I’ve said I’m attending a wedding! I feel like I have trust issues that people won’t show up 😂😂 I think we will just recheck on those who haven’t given us a response yet closer to the thing!

For those who have accepted you dont need to contact them again, but I do see your dilemma as I think you have sent your invites out really early, so get you worry as the wedding is 9 months away from the actual wedding and anything could happen. If you wanted to you could check in with people in July to just reconfirm they are coming for your pwn piece of mind

For the non responses, did you give a deadline to RSVP by? IF yes, then wait, if no I would contact them 4 weeks before your planning meeting with the venue to say you have to provide final numbers by X date (one week before the actual date) and would be great if they could confirm ASAP. To be fair, you have a long time till the date so for some it is probably not something they thin about yet as have plenty of time.

View quoted message Yes I think this is what I’m worrying about! We sent the invites out earlier than normal but we have quite a few very close friends coming to the UK from Australia, Dubai, Bali etc so we definitely wanted them to have enough time to plan travel for that! But didn’t want to invite them and word get round we didn’t send them to anyone else 😂😂 but thank you for your advice! I’ll probably just casually reach out again a few weeks before meeting with our venue to double check everyone can still make it!

I think I have the same trust issues as you! I'm always convinced that people won't show up on the day, or they will forget etc. etc. even though they have RSVP'd yes! We sent our invitations out in November 2023 for our wedding in early April 2024, only that early because of Christmas in the way etc.

We have a wedding website with all of the details etc. on it, and we collected guest's email addresses as part of the RSVP. I am thinking about sending a 'reminder' email out when we're at 4 weeks to go, just saying something like "Hi, can't wait to see you all and celebrate with you. Please check back on our wedding website for final details and timings."

That way I can subtly remind people, and reassure myself that people will actually turn up...

I think Emily's idea of creating an excuse to send an email is a good one. Actually checking with people that they are still coming could be seen as rude, but an email going "Here are the final details and looking forward to seeing you" comes across as assuming they are still coming but will hopefully remind folk if they've forgotten!

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Thank you Emily! This is super helpful, we haven't created a website or anything but i could definitely see if we could send out a generic text message with just some final details/timing reminders etc as i know some people might have misplaced the invitations etc! Definitely don't want to come across as forceful like ARE YOU STILL COMING!!! haha! Really appreciate your advice though, probably something i definitely will do closer to the time and it will give people the chance to respond if they aren't able to make it!

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Thank you RomanticGreen! Definitely agree! I think closer to the time i am just going to send a generic text just letting everyone know we can't wait to see them and celebrate with them and just give them some final details/timing reminders maybe in case some people have lost/misplaced the invite haha!!