Finding that wedding planning is testing our relationship

I think wedding planning often tests your relationship, it's a bit like buying a house in that way. There's a lot to do, a lot of money to spend, potentially competing ideas or priorities...

For me and FH, the test has come with navigating the utter nightmare that is his mother haha - it's tested our relationship, had a real strain on what we want to do for our day, been the negative of our wedding planning experience and the cause of 95% of our arguments. The whole process has made him rethink his approach to dealing with her (which in his single days had very much been to do whatever she wants as it's less stressful than arguing with her which infuuuuriated me), his relationship with her, the knock on effect this has with his wider family etc.. the negative impact it has on our relationship has lessed and lessed as we've dealt with more and more of her incidents though as he's got better at dealing with her and I've got better at not letting her upset me so much.

Sometimes I think these big moments almost force you into arguments or debates or trying situations as a way of preparing you for being married. There's always going to be things that crop up in your life and this a kind of crash course in figuring out how you'll deal with those things as a couple. For us, it's FMIL and how we deal with her - as I'm sure she'll cause havock with many more things in our lives and we're going to need to manage that. For you, it's organisation - it might be that you find rearranging responsibilities work best for you, it might be that FH needs to learn more about deadlines, it might be that you need to support him more than you'd like with these things, sometimes one person has to bend more than the other and other times it's more of a compromise. I don't know what it'll be that works for you but sometimes I think you need to let it out with each other to then bring the problem to the forefront and work together to find a solution that's going to work for you both.

I don't know if that helps at all, but I hope it makes you feel a little better to hear other relationships are being tested during this time too haha

I don't feel like our relationship is tested but I definitely think we have bickered a bit more than normal in the past few weeks as we creep closer and closer!