Flakey guests!

I'd just not invite them to the wedding breakfast and explain that you couldn't risk losing that money if they decided on the day they couldn't make it! If I couldn't give a definite "yes" answer i wouldnt expect someone to pay for my meal! x

Hello! Congratulations! 😊


This is the most annoying thing isn’t it! And when the stress comes in because of others! We put on our day invites to RSVP by a certain date and thankfully everyone did (not to say some people may not turn up on the day) it’s always the risk unfortunately but it’s you that’s paying for it so I think definitely give a time where you need a definite answer otherwise yoh will be stressing until the wedding day and maybe paying for an empty space especially if you wanted to give to someone else! I don’t know how you’re doing it but they could go in the evening? It’s a lot of money to pay for someone who’s not 100% so maybe evening guest would be better due to not being able to give a definite answer xxx

Your venue will have a cut off date for the latest time you can give them confirmed numbers, so this guest can’t make a decision on the day. Have they said a reason why they can’t let you know for sure? It would have to be something pretty serious to justify this behaviour! For example I have a cousin in hospital and a friend about to give birth - both of them have said they’ll give me a final answer a week before, so if they can do it, so can this guest!

View quoted message Hello thank you, and congratulations too!


We did give people a deadline but I was double checking dietary requirements ahead of our last planning meeting and now they have said they can’t confirm whether they’re coming as if their baby has a poo they’ll need to go!? I have said maybe best they only go to the evening but they keep saying we’ll just wait and see?!
I said I need a definite answer but now I’m not getting a response. What the heck do I do now lol x

View quoted message This sounds so frustrating! So confusing though if babys poo they surely just go change them and come back and resume what they were doing? Sounds a bit of a poor excuse? But depends completely upto you but maybe best to just say I’m really sorry I need definite numbers and as you can’t give that it may be best if you come to the evening? At least they will still be there too! I know they may think it’s harsh but if they’re not making an effort to properly say yes or no or to even stay there incase their child passes a poo how strange! I haven’t heard that one before haha xx

I have never heard anything as ridiculous as someone saying that basically they cant tell you if they can join you for your wedding breakfast if their baby has a poo! Maybe I am reading this wrong but, if I'm not, I am wondering if they are afflicted with sort of disorder, which makes their odd potential excuse forgivable, or whether they are just a truly weird pair of humans! If it is tge latter I would politely just dis invite them on cost less grounds.

Take them off your list! The only way one of my guests would get away with this was if their due date was like a few weeks either way of my wedding

This is the most ridiculous excuse I have heard. I have friends and family coming with babies and small children, the youngest being 6 months old. They have all confirmed their attendance at the whole day. I'm sure in that day their babies will poo more than once. They will just go change them.

I would just say to her that you have to give the venue firm numbers and so you are removing her from the list for the wedding breakfast. I would not put up with an excuse like that.

Like Ollie has said the only reason I would allow someone to not give a solid response was if the wedding was around their due date or they suffered with an illness which meant they didn't know if they would be feeling up to it.

This is truly bizarre! I would remove them from the list, citing numbers are limited and you would like to include somebody else in their place if they are unable to attend.

Good luck!

This is incredibly rude!

As others have said, the only possible reason for behaving like this is either if you suffer from a serious health condition which may prevent you coming OR your due date is around the time of the wedding. And even then, the appropriate response is 'I'm so sorry, but I wouldn't be able to confirm being there because of my health condition/due date and leave it up to the couple to say 'we'll leave the place open for you on the off-chance you are able to come'.

You can politely remind the guest about the importance of a headcount for the wedding breakfast and the costs involved. If they are still unsure, you may need to consider giving them a deadline for a final decision or making alternate arrangements.

Hi Anna!

I would send a further message stating that with the amount of planning involved to perfect your big day, you suggest they come to just the reception instead; as you have other people that really want to attend the full day.

Don't forget, this is your special day. Anyone making the day difficult to me is not worthy of the seat and the expense.

I hope this helps!

Best,
A.

Honestly it sounds like it’s causing you stress and I feel like on the day you’ll be stressed not knowing if they’ll be there or not. If they wanted to they would and they aren’t prioritising it. So I would say leave them out of the breakfast. Their loss not yours x