GGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR Family Poltics again !

I think the seating plan can end up being the most emotive part of the day! You'll never please everyone so will have to compromise.

Our father's were deceased, so we sat our Mums on the top table, either side of us and H's Mum's 2nd husband on a separate table with some old friends of his and H's relatives. His Mum wasn't too happy but she'd not contributed to or got involved in the day whereas my Mum had paid for and was hosting the day and we didn't want her to be uncomfortable.

In your situation I would consider your top table just being you and your attendants (BMs, best man, ushers with or without their partners, then your parents can host other tables.

Hiya,

We have the same problem, when I explained to the hotel where we are getting married that my parents where divorced what can we do? He suggested have a top table with just me and h2b on it. Both bridesmaids can sit with partners and kids and not problems on parents as mine are both remarried. I believe from a magazine its called a sweet heart table. Certainly saved me 1 less headache even though I have one big one at the moment my Dad!

Good Luck Hun

x

Champagne, think thats a good idea! That way, you'll not have the hassle. x

I am thinking weather to just have me, OH, my dad and dad's partner (as they are paying for most of it) on a top table and then all the others can sit on normal tables with there partners.

I am still going round later though as I feel he is being unreasonable and needs to remember that it's his son's wedding.

OH has said if he still kicks up a fuss then i'll tell him not to bother coming at all. Which I don't really want but I don't want drama on the day.

To a certain degree, i can see his point, as in, why should your Dads partner be on the top table, but not your OH Dads partner? I understand your reasoning, but it may not be as clear to him. Would it really spoil your day if all the parents and partners were on the top table? If so, could you consider having a top table of just you an OH, and say BM and Bridesmaids?

Our top table had me, H, CBM and her partner and best man and his partner on it as our parental units are mightily complicated too. We also decided we'd rather sit with friends we'd have a laugh with rather than our parents!!

Hmmmm ... I reckon if its important to him to sit with his partner, you should try to accommodate that. Personally, I am having my dad's new partner on the top table. My mum doesn't have a new partner, but if she did, they would be there.

If your OHs dad is happy not to sit on the top table, then why not just put him on another table?

Putting myself in his partners positon (which I could be, one day, as my OH already has children) ... I too would like to be sat with him. It wouldn't bother me if we sat seperately at a friends wedding where I knew other people - but family events where you know very few people (with the exception probably of those on the top table) and there are also ex wives/husbands and their families to deal with can be very daunting.

And the other point I suppose is that by sitting them seperately there is a degree of 'excluding' the new partner. fair enough you may not consider her as family - but you are asking people to come and celebrate your relationship, and so it seems only fair to also respect other peopels relationships and make new partners of family emembers feel welcome?

I understand everyone views thank you.

We are going round tonight to talk about it, think I just needed to get it off my chest that was all.

Can you do what loobyg did?

The sweetheart table works really well in these circumstances. To make the parents feel 'important' you can have them 'host' a table. That way they all get to sit with their partners but the parent is the important figure and the partner just happens to be sat next to them IYSWIM.

x