Gift List

To be honest most people will buy you what they want regardless or give money, people are set in their own personal ways

my family like lists as the can spend a lot on something you need but friends buy token presents instead usually based on your personality

my friend didn't have a list got lots of personal thing from mr. & mrs. clothing with there names on to charicatures through to hand made framed shadow boxes but the things that wernt hand made where stuff people knew would be used like fancy kitchen wear because they love cooking and hosting

We specified no gifts required. Especially as we were not inviting anyone so didn't want snide complaints of did I still expect a gift .We received a few bottles of bubbles, Mr and Mrs signs, photo frames, cutlery and glasses. multiply that by more people you could have a lot of glasses etc!

We're not having a list and have made it known that we don't want gifts. Our parents have contributed to the wedding by way of buying our clothes and cake. If people want to spend money then we'd rather they donated to our local dog rescue charity instead and we've made that known to those who have asked what we want.

We're not having one. We have lived in delicious sin for 5 years, had kids and built up out home from scratch already so we don't need anything. Neither are we asking for money but I know for a fact people will ask my parents so perhaps will end up with a few personal gifts and money to put towards something.

gift lists make me nervous as 99% of the things are out of my price range! But if you do actually need things then I think having a set list is a great tool for guests

I think one issue I have with them is you can often buy things cheaper than on the registry if you shop around so as suggestions for what people need there alright but you are expected to buy off the list (or risk ending up with 5 of the same thing) so that mean we can usually only buy the cheaper option even if we could get something batter buying elsewhere

I find with family its often better to give them indervidual list (nothing repeated) so they can pick something but let them find stuff themselves and that way you get what you need but they're still in control of price... example:

granny: towels, cutelry, glasses

aunty: toaster, bed sheets, mugs,

uncle: kettel, bathroom set, pillows

cousin: plates, coat hanger, rug

they can choose to spend £5, £50 or £500 and also the gift recieve doesnt know the cost so no one feel bad giving a 'cheap' gift

We are asking for money rather than items for the usual reasons - we already share a house and have lots of stuff, and we want to do up the house in the future. We may well end up with the odd photo frame and set of glasses, but that's ok!

I think that the most popular thing to give is money, from talking to friends / colleagues / family. If there is no specific instruction for charitable donation or a gift list etc, most would just stick a few notes in the congratulations card and assume it would be for the honeymoon or home improvements.

OH would rather not have a gift list, too, so you're not the one one fighting with this I've persuaded him that we know people are asking about a giftlist (and have been since we got engaged!) and we do NOT want 20 "Mr and Mrs" photo frames or anything of the kind.

We have a lot of stuff in our house that is second or third hand that OH got when he was living with an ex so I'd like to update those AND I think it will be nice to refer to the dinner set/glassware etc as being a wedding gift We also don't have a few bits that we've been putting off buying as we're saving for the big day.

There of course will be no necessity and this will be clearly stated - we just know that as guests ourselves we'd want to contribute... and would like to know that contribution is useful to the newly weds

You can alternatively either do the charity donation thing OR let people know that gift vouchers for Homebase or something would be appreciated if you're buying a new home / wanting to do decorating in the near future once everything has settled down?

We did a Gift List with www.marriagegiftlist.co.uk which allowed us to add gifts from any website. There was nothing we "needed" as we have lived together 4 years but there are things we had secondhand or bought cheap when we first set up home and we took the opportunity to replace them with things that would last and were to our taste. So the charity shop will be doing quite well out of us when we get home! We also found some furniture we'd like in a quirky local furniture store so quite a few guests bought us vouchers.

If you aren't in a similar boat then are you having a honeymoon? If so, you could do something like Honeyfund where guests buy you a particular experience for your honeymoon, e.g. a particular tour, meal out, spa experience.

my worry was if we didn't give guests guidance then we'd end up with tat which would clutter up our house and eventually end up in the charity shop - then I'd have felt sad and guilty that someone has spent money on something I don't want. We didn't get any such tat, so success!

We've set up a Honeyfund, we've been together 15 years and have the house. We're making it clear that we don't expect anything, but I know people will want to contribute. We've stated we might use any money towards either a Honeymoon or home improvements.

How are you going about asking money?

We are trying to think of a way without it seeming rude.

What some friends of mine did was say that gifts weren't required, but if people wanted to give them something they'd like money towards some art for their home. My H2B and I are asking for money to put towards our honeymoon as there's nothing we really need because we've lived together for 2 years. You could always think of a few things you want as well in case people want to buy an actual gift (my grandparents got very flustered about the idea of giving money instead of a gift so we came up with something for them to buy us)

If you don't have a list people will ask you anyway so best to have an unofficial list to make suggestions from or a choice of vouchers that they can get you.

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