Gutted - FA Cup final - OH's team playing and its our wedding day :(

What time is the match?

If it's an evening kick off, could you have a screen set up somewhere in the venue for the men to go and watch if they're interested (read as: if their OH's allow it lol)?

That way they'd only be missing out on the Evening Reception so would be more mentally present for the important Ceremony bits?

Kick off is still tbc but the FA Cup final is likely to be a 12.45 or a 3pm. *Possibly* a 5.45 but I think it's unlikely.

There's absolutely no chance we will be having a big screen up. The OH doesn't want that and i certainly dont.

We have not paid this amount of money for people to watch the football

Fair enough.

I guess you just need to hope that it won't overtake the Wedding. I highly doubt it would. H2B gets football alerts on his phone, but he just kind of checks them on the sly and leaves it at that.

It's a Wedding and it sounds like yours will be lovely so I'm sure they'll be having so much fun that they won't even think about the football

Hope so! OH says he isnt going to have his phone on him...... lets see.

Nothing I can do about it now just have to hope it doesnt ruin the day

From the independent:

"The kick-off time for the final has yet to be confirmed but is expected to be an evening start to appease television audiences – the match being shown on both the BBC and BT Sport. The last four FA Cup finals have kicked off at 5pm or later, including last season’s at 5.30pm, in which Arsenal beat Aston Villa 4-0."

We're in the same boat, except I'm the Palace fan! What we've done is asked our venue what the rules are as it's not a hotel so may not have a tv license, but may be covered under some entertainment license instead, but no reply yet. We've decided to hopefully show the game because we know there will be people ignoring us and checking their phones constantly (including me and my dad ha) and it'll also be nice as it gives another chance for guests to mingle with other people.

Edited as didn't see the previous reply, but if you BOTH don't want the football shown, then it wont ruin the day at all. Most guests wont be rude enough to ignore the wedding for 2 hours, especially if your OH isn't paying attention, they'll follow his lead on that

I feel your pain!

Whilst it's not yet confirmed my OH is a Brighton fan and there is a possibility that they are going up to the Premiershipand there would be a VERY strong possibility that if they do, their 1st game might be on our wedding day!!!

I have told him he can forget it!!!!! ???

I understand perfectly why this would bother you! My H2B is an obsessive football fan, he wont miss a home game so if his team were at home we'd have lost half the guest list and the groom! Our only options were to get married at the end of season which he didn't want due to FA cup etc or to pick an international football weekend in November so that's what we did! He contacted FIFA to make sure what date it was and that was the weekend we had to work with! Not ideal but it's a battle I wouldn't have won!

I really hope it doesn't ruin your day!

Anna x

I know how you feel. My OH is a football fanatic and told me that we couldn't get married in 2016 as there was a lot of football on. We agreed on 1/7/17 as there is "no football on" in his words. I wanted the last weekend in June and that was a no-no as he has a football conference every year on that weekend!

If you don't want the screen up (which I don't blame you for) then I would say that's a good idea. I went to a wedding reception that was on the evening of the World Cup final and all of the men were in the TV bar next door. I would not be impressed.

I guess you will just have to take your H2B's word that he won't watch it and won't have his phone on him. I'm sure it will all be fine X

I feel your pain, how unfortunate timing for you

But I was expecting you to be worried that OH was planning on finding a way to watch it which would be upsetting of course, but if like you say neither of you want it on, then you shouldn't worry in my opinion. On the day, all that matters is you and him. If the guests want to watch it then fine, it is only 90 mins. And if it is during the day, which it doesn't sound like it will be, and your gusts would rather watch the football then take part in your day, then they can sod off in my opinion......that would just be rude and I wouldn't even invite people that would be that rude. Good luck!

Sorry to hear about the bad timing! If everyone's staying overnight at the venue and not rushing off next morning, could you arrange a football screening for next morning, for after breakfast, for any fans, eg in a room in the hotel? Order pizza, arrange for some comfy chairs; and even if they already know the score, at least they can enjoy watching it together - could be quiet a relaxing way to spend a hangover too!

I've got a whole load of relatives who are Palace fans for our wedding. Unlucky for them there is no wifi or 3G coverage so they'll all just have to enjoy the wedding instead ? It does annoy me though because people have asked us about it and I just want to say "ARE YOU SERIOUS?! It's our wedding day, I don't give two hoots about the football!". I can see how it might worry you given that it's important to your OH but if he says he's fine with it (and it's kind of too late if he isn't!) then nobody else has a right to comment or slope off to catch the score. We'll have to compare notes after our weddings!

? Sounds like he has intentions to prioritize the big day.

Sorry to hear that, this is one of my fears... I HATE football and will be spending an awful lot of money and time on entertainment and the 'party' so call me bridezilla but id be far less than polite when confronting people (fiancee included) if they where rude enough to ignore our day thats been planned for years and be anti-social over a stupid bloody game

apparently you cant pre-plan these things though as foodball dates aren't released until later ☹️

We have now just had a drop out as they are going to Wembley for the final!!!!

They confirmed they were coming months ago and have now dropped out for a football match 3 weeks before!

They are (or should I say were) my OH's friends and he has vowed to never speak to them ever again!

We've printed all the table plan/place names and we've confirmed all our numbers to the venue so will have to bump up someone from the evening to the day and re-print.

I am furious but also is a blessing in disguise as shows who true friends are before we spend that much money on people to be there!!!

I've just read the original post to my H2B......and sitting hear listening to him justifying the use football as playing any part of our wedding is quite frankly laughable!

Now, don't get me wrong I like football, I have frequented many a football match, I even drove 3 hours whilst being 8 months pregnant to watch my team (Newcastle) get tonked 4-0

HOWEVER.....football would never play ANY part in my wedding celebrations! It's one chuffing game (albeit 1st FA Cup final is a little different), but still it's your WEDDING and if people drop out of your day for that quite frankly piss poor reason, well, they didn't deserve to be invited in the first place!

Rant over!!!

Sounds like your OH's head is in the right place so you won't need to worry about him. I too would be majorly p*ssed if one of my guests dropped out for that reason with just over 3 weeks to go.

My OH is a Man Utd fan and we also have a wedding that day, so I know he will be discretely checking the Sky Sports app but he won't be going looking for it on a big screen.

Fortunately we're getting married out of season but if OH started telling me when we could and couldn't get married dependent on the fixtures I would be rethinking my choice of groom ?

When it comes to football there are some for whom it will always come first, a few world cups ago before mobile phones I took a shot of someone at the back of the ceremony room watching a game on a hand held portable tv with an aerial sticking up, so if they are going to do it with that contraption imagine how much easier it is now for someone to do it with an app on a phone.

I think it will be very hard to prevent those people "disappearing" during the day that are intent on watching the game, the only real answer is to provide a tv for them.☹️

I don't "do" football either, luckily for me being a wedding photographer.

Oh I am so sorry to hear that someone has dropped out, to go to Wembley, that is brazen. Hopefully the person that you bump up will have a brilliant time and the seating plan is easy to re do

Another thing you could do is when you find out time of KO, if possible re-jig some of the timings, so first dance is 5 mins after KO, and any man checking his phone during that will be successfully scorned by any women there. Cake cutting at half time, etc.

That's the other reason we are hopefully providing a tv, on the way back from the semi, my dad, brother and uncle were discussing the time frame of the day and looking at train times to Wembley! In front of me and my OH. Luckily they have seen sense.

I think I might be in the minority here where I would be up there with my H2B in watching the footy match...BUT I know it wouldn't take anything out of the day and I would see it as 1.5 hours where the TV would be on for some people and then the rest of the day will continue. However, our wedding is so laid back that this would just fit right in really.

I can see your frustration on the guest dropping out though, that's not really fair at all especially as you have paid for it all, it does sound like your OH has a good attitude towards the whole thing though and I don't think he would let this outshine the wedding at all.

It'll be an amazing day no matter what and when it's all going on the footy will just be in the background - not taking away from you at all.

If everyone is a footy fan (including both people who are getting married) then maybe you could get away with the football being on but I think it stops being "background" when you have half of your guests crowded around a screen shouting at the ref. Football fans will invariably be glued to the screen completely ignoring everything around them which in my opinion does take attention away from the wedding and the couple.

To the OP....If someone decided not to come to my wedding after saying they would for a football match, I'm pretty sure I'd blow my top and probably never speak to them again! When I told my OH about this, he thought my reaction was a bit OTT but I'm sticking to it!

I feel your pain - football is a ***. My OH is a huge Leicester fan so I'm slightly relieved our wedding isn't this year or I'm sure he'd be asking to move it...

What's the signal like at your venue? Fingers crossed for limited reception so it can't tempt people to sit on their phones.

That said, if it's any reassurance we went to a wedding early last year that clashed with a big Leicester match (that was at home so all the lads who had season tickets missed it!) and they only has a sneaky peak at the score every now & then.

Don't worry too much though, it's your special day - plenty of other opps for football!

Thanks everyone for all the views

Signal thankfully is terrible so I'm hoping i'll be ok and people wont be able to be on their phones constantly.

I'm definitely not having a screen showing it, no chance. I'm not that bothered and I think it will encourage even the neutrals to watch it.

Each to their own though of course

For those planning a wedding in 2018, best avoid the World Cup final weekends.......always a forum issue every 4 years.....

Peter

Well being Leicester wedding photographer, football is something that has somewhat dominated at least the speeches of late - as you can imagine !