Harry Styles/Caroline Flack saga

I'm the same age as Caroline Flack and cannot imagine what she might have in common with a 17 year old boy but like you say, she's doing nothing wrong (if they are even together). The 1D fans sound like how the Brosette's used to be back in the day, they were hardcore!

Dawn Porter wrote this in her blog:

Dear Caroline Flack,

I see you have been ‘spotted’ with a younger man? Fourteen years younger to be precise. He is, however, old enough to legally allow you to take an interest in him, and he is also too old to be your son – just – so that’s good news.

I am sure people are imagining that this came about because you unsuspectingly straddled him and manipulated the poor boy into making you feel good about yourself? No one wants to think of young Harry being predatory. You are an older woman, all people want to think is that you seduced him – the poor, credulous victim of your saggy old boobies and desperate, over eager fanny.

Well, Caroline. I have met Mr Harry Styles (one 5th of boy band One Direction) and I can confirm without equivocation that he is neither unsuspecting nor innocent. Nor is he a normal 17 year old (I might not write that again if it’s OK, it looks younger on paper). Due to his famous status he has already lived a life most thirty year olds haven’t experienced and therefore we have to isolate him as a special case and not apply the same ‘HE IS TOO YOUNG GET OFF HIM YOU HORNY OLD SLUT’ associations with this particular situation. I have also met you and can confirm that your boobies are neither saggy, nor old. So congratulations on both counts.

When those around you offer the inevitable advice to ‘be careful’ I suggest you revert back to them, a slightly shouty tone intact, and say ‘be careful of what? Being mind numbingly boring, making safe decisions and missing out on something that is potentially really really fun?’ Then swish around, making sure your hit them around the face with your hair, and drift off to the nearest off license to buy him his cigarettes.

Caroline, I personally am all for you and Harry Styles being ‘good friends’ and think you should persist merrily with your new found ‘friendship’, allowing your heart to go in the one direction (sorry) that it feels is right. Just don’t get caught getting him drunk, at least not until his 18th birthday. If only in that respect, be careful.

Much Love, Dawn x

I am only speaking how I feel and I'm not judging anyone that think otherwise, but me being a thirty something I would in no way be able to form a relationship with a teenager, I cant get my head around it.

was just reading about this, shes openly takled about them seeing each other and no, i dont see it as a big deal. i dont think itl work out, but if they havign fun thats up to them ?

ETA - as a nearly 30 year old theres no way i could imagine going out with someone that young ever!! *shudders*

I am jealous of Harry, i think CF is hawwwt! ?

Panj, that letter is awesome! haha.

I couldn't go out with a 17 year old, it would seem wrong.

I wonder whether she'll be presenting the Xtra Factor next year? As Harry is an ex contestant, she may be alright...

Pretty much what CL said. It's not wrong, but if I'm honest I find it a bit weird.

I think that people would view it differently if it was an older male with a 17 year old girl.

Funny you should say that because one of my friends is 23 and he's seeing at 16 year old. He gets a lot of, how shall I put it, attention. Even his mum doesn't approve and that's only a 7 year gap!!

Not quite 15 year gap but when my Sister was 16, she started dating a 28 year old. He was just closer in age to my Mum than my Sister. 13 years later, they have been married 6 years, have a 5 yr old and are expecting number two. Nobody in our family batted an eyelid at the age gap, he even moved into our family home until they bought their first house together a year later.

I don't recognise either of their names. Am I turning into aj?

As for the age gap, I don't care, but there's no way I'd want to go out with a 17 year old. Blimey, no way. The only time I fancied 17 year olds was when I was 15.

On the one hand, good for her for getting a fit young man to have some fun with.

On the other hand, I've been in relationships (if you could call them that) where I've had little in common with the bloke and it wasn't until meeting Mr B (who is in the same profession as me) that I really found someone I could click with, share experiences with etc. I can't imagine that this would be the case with them.

I've recently joined a group where most of the members are students. I even find it hard having conversations with them about certain things, as they have a lot less experience of living in the real world.

Having said that, your average 17 year old boy still lives at home and his mum washes his pants. I'm sure Harry has gained a lot of wisdom and experience and grown up a lot over the past couple of years.

I simply cannot imagine how she finds common ground to have decent conversation with him, nor can I countenance her looking at him with anything approaching carnal desire. As cute as he may be (and I had to look him up as I had no idea who he was), at the age of 34, I simply want to tousle his hair, not get him naked.

I think he is acting entirely as many would expect - who in his position would turn down a fit older woman? She, however, needs to find someone who can share a bottle of wine with her over dinner.

And I agree, if it were a 17 year old girl with a 32 year old man, things would be different, if more polarised. There are some who would view it as ultimately predatory but others who understand, because I believe it to be true, than 17 year old girls very often act far more maturely than their years. 17 year old boys are still pinging brastraps.

How - HOW? - can you, at 32 years of age, want to go out with someone who's still giggling over losing his virginity?

Great letter Panj - I love Dawn Porter.

I don't know who either of these two people are, but as far as I am concerned, as long as it's legal and non-abusive, they can get up to whatever they jolly well like!

I'm jealous of Caroline Flack.?

When does this stop? My OH is 24 and still does this ?

Is it bad that I think he's pretty hot?!

no, i do too, infact, ashamedly, i think most of 1D are ?

Oh yes! Although a couple need to cut off their stupid Bieber-esque hair!

There was a thread previously about this, but I just cannot find young men sexually attractive. Do you think it boils down to sexual dominance and what your preferences are in that area?

I think it's more to do with the fact that 1D are five years older than my son and 15 years younger than me.....

Good point Mooey.

I think i just can't imagine it being much fun with a young kid (sex wise). Two pumps and a squirt maybe?

As an onlooker I don't see a problem with it, but if my son at 17 years of age started dating a woman in her 30's I would probably wish he would mix with girls of his own age. She has had her teens and he should enjoy his.

My parents met when my Dad was 17 and my mum was a 34yr old mother with 3 kids (17 year age gap so she was exactly double his age when they met!!)

They had me 6 years later, got married when I was 3months old (he was 23 and she was 40) and had my younger brother 2 years later.

Fast forward 24 years and they are still married and very happy... I don't think age gaps are always a bad thing, it certainly worked out well for my parents!

If you're lucky!

My ex partner was 53 when we got together, I was 25. Looking back, the age gap did effect us, in that I was still young, wanted to have fun and had a tendancy to be a little bit childish (still do, if the truth be told) and he was not looking for any of those things. We split up for many reasons, but this was one of the many problems in our relationship.

I am uber jealous of CF, Harry is lush - I have a photo of him on my wall at work (after joking about my lust for him, a colleague found him in a paper for me) and I am generally a bit giddy and teenage girl-ish where 1D are concerned!

I think that, ultimately, it will come down to the fact that it is a bit of fun, CF is knockin on to the age where marriage, babies, settling down will all become priorities, while Harry is out gadding with his 4 beautiful friends inducing wibbles in girls much much younger than me!

Do you find that people are quick to judge your relationship? (tell me to bugger off if I'm too nosey).

I think each to their own, and age is just a number. If they are truly compatible and happy then good luck to them. H is 19 years older than me and we have had a few comments along the same lines which just aren't fair or necessary.

Personally I think at their ages though the gap will be more obvious in terms of maturity and what they want from life though.

I don't think people are seeing a problem with the age gap as such, but more about the age of Harry. If he was 25 and she was 40, there'd be no problem.. but he's only 17.

Legal.

She's doing nothing wrong.

Let them have their fun.

But still over the age of consent so in reality people can think what they like, who cares.

I keep reading this thread title as 'Hair Styles'.

I know... My OP says exactly that... I was just saying why some people might disagree with it!