Has anyone eloped? Would you recommend it?

I think InkedDoll may be able to help here!

All I can say, is do what makes the 2 of you happy. If that's eloping with a few close friends or family members, do it!

Don't do what everyone else wants just to make them happy.

This is what we planned. And in fact, we had it all booked! But in the end, we realise people were going to be very upset and although I agree you should do what you want, I didn't feel comfortable with it. Now we are having a small wedding with our parents, grandparents and siblings, followed by a posh cream tea. So literally 3-4 hours together. Then OH and I are going straight on honeymoon for four nights.

its not costing us much at all and seems a good compromise.

We are also having a bigger party this summer to celebrate with our wider families and friends.

I think eloping is fine, if you are prepared for the fall out. We ultimately decided we weren't. I didn't want people to be negative about us getting married and feel like we had to hide it. We booked it all before we announced our engagement though, so nobody could try and pressure us into a bigger of different event.

You should do whatever feels right for you two. I still like the idea of eloping, but went for a compromise in the end. I think it's different for each couple.

I dunno if ours really counts as an elopement, as we had eleven guests. But we did go to Gretna, and we didn't tell anyone who wasn't invited til after the event.

We planned a proper elopement until my H's mum had a heart attack and he decided he wanted her there. It was still my dream to elope and I compromised, but I say think carefully about that stuff. You've said you aren't close to your families, so it may not be an issue for you. But if you have living parents, take their feelings into account.

With regard to less immediate family and friends, don't worry too much about it. All ours have been surprised, but happy. I come from a big extended family and there hasn't been any negativity at all - or none that I'm aware of anyway! Sometimes it was difficult to keep our plans secret, but that's where Hitched comes in and you avoid all the traumas that people post about so often on here - bridesmaid issues, table plans, awaiting RSVPs, warring families, etc.

Let us know what you decide!

Yes we are flying out this weekend to elope. we booked it 12 months ago, so we have been secrectly planning for a year. Best choice we ever made. We dont care what anyone thinks when they find out. We are the ones celebrating our anniversary each year, and we are the only two people in our marraige, so as far as we are concerned we did what we wanted. Genuine pple will be happy for us as everyone knows we are a private couple, who dont like fuss. So yaaayyyy 1 more day to go. those who dont like it, well they can lump it. Its our day for us so we chose to do it our way. The truth of matter is only you and h2b know what you want and whats best for you. Having said all of that, we literally just told mums and dads and siblings that we are flying out this weekend to marry, and guess what....they were all really happy for us. In fact they all said they know us and know its what we want and so although they are sad to miss it, they all said they are really pLeased. we have recieved nothing but love from our family about eloping. As for friends and other family, they will be told when we return in two weeks, and if any of them dont like it, they will just have to get over it. Life is for living and the point of life is to be happy so we made a choice 12 months ago that we were certain we would not regret...and we dont regret it one bit. We just want to be husband and wife and then have lovely sunny honeymoon. I feel very blessed right now.

Good luck. Xxxx

Like sums2b, my fiancée and I had planned to elope. It is his first marriage, my second, and I had grave misgivings about how his parents would react, especially his Mum We reached a compromise and are having a small local wedding with no more than 12 guests, a cream tea reception at the local pub mid morning and then we are off on honeymoon for 10 days. Neither of us wanted the family politics that inevitably arise if we had had a big ceremony and reception, and our budget is also small.

Only you can decide what is right for you, it might be that your families are a little hurt initially but surely they should be delighted for you also. Personally I couldnt take the risk of upsetting the most important people in my future family which is why we compromised.

L

We thought about eloping to Lapland but I really wanted my dad to walk me down the Isle. If they couldn't attend we would have gone ahead with it but I'm glad we have a few loved ones coming. I think elopement is a lovely romantic idea and there was a bride on here that did it with Chelsea pensioners as her witnesses and if I rememeber rightly they went to Paris straight after it looked lovely and her report was fab! You need to be 100% sure it's what u want. No doubt a few people will be upset but its your choice and your wedding :-)

This is the report I was on about

https://www.hitched.co.uk/chat/forums/t/447965.aspx

Hi

I eloped the first time round, literally dragged 2 strangers off the street to be our witnesses when we got there. We didn't have any money, didn't want a fuss and didn't do any planning at all! We even bought the rings when we got there!

My family were fine, he's family were not. So we were pressured into having a 'gathering' a few weeks later when we got back - as were told we had taken away their opportunity to celebrate our wedding! We didn't want to do anything, but we did what we were told - we even ended up paying for it!

I've never regretted doing it that way, but I didn't like the fall-out; and I wish we hadn't been forced to doing the 'gathering' after.

This time around H2B was up for going abroad and getting married with no/little fuss - but I wanted a big(ish) do, as I felt I missed out first time round - strange that!

Its up to you and H2B what you do, but if you do elope be prepared for the fall out that's all I can say.

Thank you everyone for your advice and sharing your wedding plans. We have decided to go for a small wedding locally with only 5 guests, and then

go to the hotel we stayed at the night we got engaged for afternoon tea. It's then off to st Lucia for our honeymoon xx

As a photographer and someone who appreciates the beauty of intimate celebrations, I think eloping can be a wonderful choice, especially if you're looking to keep things simple and personal. Many couples who elope cherish the freedom it provides to focus solely on their relationship without the pressures of a big wedding.

Regarding reactions from family and friends, it’s important to communicate your decision in a way that emphasizes your love and commitment. You might find that some people understand and support your choice once they see how happy it makes you. If you anticipate friction, consider having a small celebration afterward or sharing a thoughtful announcement to involve loved ones in your joy. Ultimately, the day is about you and your fiancé, so prioritize what feels right for both of you!