Help with invitation wording re children

Sorry, not sure if I can help but thought I'd bounce this for anyone coming on this morning...

I'm not sure there's a way to put it in the invite that doesn't sound like you're saying you don't want kids there. But have you thought about either including a short info pack with the invitations - perhaps with comprehensive directions to the venue, more information about the food and in there you could put something about the venue not being the most fun place for children. Alternatively, could you ask the venue if there's a separate room you could use as a makeshift creche for children to go when they get fed up. One venue we looked at was an old Georgian Grade II listed mansion (actually part of my old university) but they were totally prepared for tired kids and had a side room which they filled with big beanbags and things for kids to rest on. Always worth asking.

We considered this but ended up with a mean blanket no, bar family kids and tiny babas, because the total for us was 35 kiddies which is just ridiculous - we didn't want a kids party we wanted a wedding, and it would have pushed our numbers beyond our maximum. I think it's nice you still want to include kids and not make it too difficult for those coming from away - again, with us, the majority of friends were coming from all over the UK so it was impossible to accommodate their kiddies only. You could either chose to just invite the ones from far away (if this isn't a majority) and be prepared to face annoyance from those more local whose kids haven't been invited, or you could maybe say something like:

We hoped to accommodate the children of our guests at our wedding, but because there are so many little ones amongst our friends, and we are restricted with numbers, we are unfortunately unable to do so. However we appreciate that this may cause some difficulties for some of our guests, particularly those coming from further afield; so we would be most grateful if you could let us know as soon as possible (or by date) if you are happy to come just as a couple or not. We can then hopefully find a solution to suit all.

Many thanks, Jack and Jill xxx

It's by no means perfect, but hopefully (as we found) from that, there will be a lot of couples who are more than glad to come without their kids so they can have a nice night or 2 away together and have a few drinks. With our decision, there were only one couple who aren't coming at all, 2 who aren't bringing their wives (which is a shame but they're OH's friends and he's quite pleased as their wives are a bit 'funny' and he thinks they'll have more fun without, and then one couple who are coming but moaned and moaned…

Sorry to be so late coming back to this! Thanks for the bounce Rae.

Cheers for the input, it's much appreciated. It's not so much that we don't want ANY kids but at the same time, I'm not sure I'm conveying to guests that the venue isn't that child-friendly. It's quite a small building with only two main rooms - our evening disco will be in the downstairs room and the upstairs room will be a quieter space - it's still a big room and will be noisy but I wonder if we could make it more child-friendly? The beanbags are a great idea!

Lamby, your wording is lovely. That could definitely be an option.

We are doing an info sheet with the invitations so this is where we'll mention it. I sent my wording to my friend who's a writer yesterday. She came back with this - any thoughts?

"Children are welcome on the day and a children's meal will be provided. Please let us know if your child requires a high chair.

Please note the venue is in a public park and so children will need supervising at all times. We'd also like to advise that as the venue was originally built to accommodate 14th century monks it isn't entirely child friendly!"

Waaaah! What's happened to my font?!

How about addressing the invitation to the adults only. Then on the info sheet, put something along the lines of...

"Children are very welcome to come to the wedding howver we would like to advise that the venue isn't compleltely child friendsly. The reception takes place in a public park therefore your child will need to be supervised at all times. If you chose to bring your children to the wedding, please let us know their names and ages so we can arrange for a children's meal to be provided. Please also advise if your child needs a highchair."

Or something...

Ooh, that's a good idea. Thanks GB ?

I'm with GB - I think it would work if you only invited the adults, then either mention something on the info sheet or see who gets in touch to see if they can bring the kids because they need to IYSWIM.

We are restricted with numbers as well, so will not be inviting any children/babies. One couple we spoke to, before we told them this, asked if we could make it no children so they could enjoy a day/night out!!! I think a lot of couples will be pleased to not have to bring children, so I don't think you should worry too much. I would go with the above suggestions. xx

Hmmm im not too sure about this one. You could put in something as a seperate note to those who have children something like "As we are aware it is especially difficult at this time of year to find childcare, you are welcome to bring you children with you for the day. If you plan to do so, please let me know with your RSVP"