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J
Beginner April 2023 Sorrento

Hen Do - close to cancelling

Jill, 20 March, 2023 at 12:18 Posted on Planning 0 2
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My hen do is planned for this weekend coming. We went back and forward for weeks just to get a weekend we were all available. It’s a lodge in Scotland for 2 nights. I’ve kept it low key and low cost cos I understand people are struggling just now. There was 10 of us going but I’m honestly so disheartened by it that I want to just cancel. My sister (and MOH) is annoyed that she wasn’t involved in planning but my friends (and bridesmaids) know me better. My sister thinks a hen weekend needs to be drinking in Newcastle or somewhere abroad but that’s just not me. I understand she’s hurt but she won’t talk to me about it. One of my friends has dropped out because she’s not well (a full week before the hen) and others have decided to only do one night instead of two which has left me paying the remainder. I’m so anxious that the weekend will be awful and no one will have a good time 😞

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Latest activity by Danielle, 21 March, 2023 at 09:58
  • Katie
    Beginner November 2024 Nottinghamshire
    Katie ·
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    I’m sorry to hear that - it all sounds quite stressful.
    It’s your hen….not anyone else’s, so it doesn’t matter if it’s not your MoH’s cup of tea! (IMO a lodge in Scotland sounds much nicer than drinking in Newcastle!)
    Even if you’re feeling disheartened at the moment, when the time comes and you’re there with the people who have made the effort and care about you, you will probably have the best weekend ever.
    It’s a shame you have had to cover for those who have changed their plans, maybe you could be honest about how you’re feeling about it and see if they stick to two nights instead of one?
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  • K
    Dedicated June 2023 Essex
    Kirsty ·
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    Hey, sorry to hear this is stressing you out. My hen is in May and like you I am not a big party person, so we are staying in a lodge in Norfolk Friday - Monday. There is also 10 of us. My MOH booked it for me but I have been heavily involved in the planning. We split the cost of the weekend equally amongst the 10 of us and she got payment from everyone on booking. Like you we have some people not staying the whole weekend, due to work etc. Most people are coming Friday after work, 1 person is coming Saturday morning and half of them are going home Sunday afternoon as they need to go to work on Monday, which I totally understand. I'm just glad they are making the effort to come. Despite some people doing less nights, everyone has still paid the same.

    I think you should talk to the people that have changed their plans. If they agreed to pay a certain price, then really they should honour that. Its not really fair that your are stuck with more of the cost because people have changed their plans, especially this close to the hen.

    With your sister, I think you can either talk to her about it and just apologise that you didn't include her in the planning but then explain why or you ignore it and move past it. It is your hen at the end of the day, I know you want everyone to enjoy it (I'm sure they will), but this is for you and it really only matters that its your thing! Your friends are all coming to celebrate with you and are there for you - I am sure you will have a great time and so will they.

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