Hen Party woes

Why are you having to pay for half of the entire cost? Can most people invited not afford it? Not been given enough notice? And how come your bridesmaids are not organising it? I would have no issue being involved in the organising as a bride but I wouldn't want to be the only one organising it. Could you scale it down and just invite the people that can afford to go?

Know I'll be very much in the minority here but never in a million years would I expect anyone to organise anything for me. Getting married is my choice and my partner's choice so why should others organise MY hen party? People have their own very busy lives to be getting on with and I don't think it's fair to expect them to organise MY hen party. Weddings are expensive enough for guests without the added expense of an expensive hen party too.

I didn't necessarily expect the bridesmaids to organise it, however, at the outset when I asked them to be bridesmaids I also asked if they could organise the hen party or at the very least help me organise it which they agreed to and were happy with as I suffer from quite bad anxiety. Had they not been I would not have forced the issue.

I was looking at having the hen do in August/September this year and gave the bridesmaids all the contact details of the people who would like in invite in September last year, but have only just found out that nothing has been done and I have been told that they are not able to plan or offer any assistance with it.

I appreciate that weddings are expensive and we are paying for all of the bridesmaids dresses, accessories, hair and make up and the accommodation, including a spa day the day before the wedding.

The budget I had in mind as an absolute maximum was £150; I've been on plenty of hen do's that have been around about this figure and most have even gone over this sum, some have been as expensive as £300+. However, some people have said £150 is far too much money for 2 nights accommodation, food and activities.

The problem I have is that I have lived in so many different parts of the country over the last 15-20 years that I have friends all over the place so there is no ideal place really.

You might be better to organise it yourself, especially if you suffer from bad anxiety. That way you know it's done how you want it and you won't have any added anxiety of them not doing it.

So far I've cancelled two hen dos because my friends didn't want to come, they had their reasons. Now I've organised one in a pub locally and have offered to put anyone up myself who may have to travel far. It seemed the simplest, cheapest solution for me and means that guest numbers aren't limited. I personally would not pay for half of something that no one including myself could afford, try doing something cheaper and simpler that everyone can afford to do.

Hi, I've also organised my own hen party but I expected to do it myself anyway.

I think your main issue is that the people you are trying to accommodate aren't really giving an inch, I don't think £150pp for 2 nights is bad at all especially in 6 weeks holidays. If I was you I wouldn't waste precious funds paying for other people to come and would organise something low key and local to you and anyone who wants to put the effort in will be there but wont cost you a bomb.

Im getting married in October. I agree with everyone else and im not letting anyone plan my hen night (i've been on a few failures let me tell u!) I plan on travelling to a destination (not sure where yet but any ideas welcome....have had leeds so far) and book into a hotel for a few nights on a friday have a few drinks and a meal probably and then during the saturday probs do shopping or whatever and then have a great night out on the saturday! Anyone who can't make it then im sorry but they will have had plenty of notice to save/arrange babysitter/book time off work etc and i wont be paying for anyone else, i dont mind helping them out but im not paying for them to enjoy themselves on my own hen night! I would NEVER do that to anyone myself. U can still have ur cottage but just make the games and stuff for the saturday if people arrive on the friday then everyone is fresh after a good nights sleep thats the way im thinking anyway lol and get ur friends to all chip in to cover the stay that way ur not spending ur own money or wedding fund on them. Its not fair you should pay for ur friends to enjoy YOUR hen night. £150 isn't much to pay if shared between people. I wouldn't be offended if my friend was to say it to me in fact id be offended if she did want to pay for me! Id be mortified.