Okay, so I don't know if this is the correct area or not, but I definitely need some advice or at the very least, unbiased opinions.
It's an extremely long story, so I won't go in to details unless you want to know everything. I'll give you the basics:
Been with SO for nearly 3 1/2 years. When we first met, his mother was completely obsessed with his ex girlfriend and would say things like "she's the daughter I never had" (she had a baby girl who suffered cot death). His sister in law is still best friends with her, and would text him saying that I'm not his ex-girlfriend and that we had nothing in common etc. So right from the start, I felt alienated. I wasn't a girly girl like she was and wasn't interested in watching Geordie Shore or TOWIE or anything like that. I did my best to ignore everything, even though I would walk in to his mother's house and see photos of him and his ex still plastered on the wall, and she brought the ex up in nearly every conversation.
I then fell pregnant, and the mother in law became very very obsessed and nosey. She was telling us what to name her, saying she wanted her every Friday and even moved down the street from us. Now, my little girl was born at 28 weeks gestation, and she was in the neonatal care unit for 7 weeks. Throughout this time, I was being treated for sepsis and was obviously extremely unwell, and me and my fiance weren't concentrating on anything except my daughter and myself getting better. The reason for her prematurity was my house had been covered in mould that the agency refused to deal with. (but that's another story). Now, when the mother in law came up to the hospital, she would look at all the other premature babies and comment on how beautiful they are and she wouldn't actually look at my daughter because she was too busy with everyone else's babies. The nurse actually had to tell her to stop because even if the parents weren't there, she would look at the babies in the incubator and the nurse said it's a violation of privacy. She would say things to the nurses like "she didn't even want kids a couple of months ago" which makes me sound absolutely awful. I'd said, way before I ever fell pregnant, that I wasn't that bothered about having kids. Throughout the 7 weeks, she came up about four times. So these little things really started to irritate me.
Whilst she was in the incubator, we moved in to my mum and dad's house, because we didn't have the money to move somewhere else, and I would need sufficient care when my partner returned to work. I think this is where the jealousy kicked in. Now, his father is an alcoholic abusive waste of space who beat the mother up and his children. She told her daughter to go f*ck herself when given the choice between her kids or him. So while ever he was at the house, we said our daughter wasn't going there. She was welcome to take her to the park (when she was a few months older) or take her shopping or whatever, but I didn't want my daughter around that man. His mother then started slagging my family off even though they hadn't done a thing wrong, and I'm the type of person who can't let things go. So I then refused to put an effort in with her. She refused to apologise, and blamed everything on everyone else, rather than herself.
Anyway, time goes on and she still hasn't apologised so we didn't really talk whenever she came around. I was diagnosed with cholecystitis and gallstones, as well as an issue with my heart, so I'd been hospitalised a few times. I fell pregnant again a few months after all this too. We found out that his mother had been slagging me off to his ex girlfriend saying that she wishes it was her that had got pregnant, that it was her kids not mine, that I'm a disrespectful *** and I'm rude etc. This was a massive blow to me, because it was one thing slagging me off and another to his ex who I already knew she was obsessed with.
Around 12 arguments have happened in total, so there is too much to go in to. Things like I shouldn't have took my daughter to go dress shopping for my brothers wedding because it was HER day to have her, I posted a status on Facebook about having a headache and that was apparently taking the p*ss out of her because she had a headache (didn't even have her added at this point), she leaves both of my daughters in the car on their own so she can run in to the petrol shop, she keeps them up until 11pm,12am which then throws off their entire schedule when I get them back. The latest thing is she has apparently taken some tablets and overdosed. She went to hospital and came out the next day. I find this a little strange because surely they would do something like a suicide watch? Anyway,both of his brothers have now got involved slagging me off and blaming my fiance for everything. I've been threatened by his dad on Facebook, her sister who I've never even met, has slated me on Facebook too. At the moment, it feels like everyone is against us, even though we've done nothing wrong but want to protect our daughters.
I've deleted all his family on my Facebook, changed my number and I don't speak to any of them now.
The whole point of this post is...do I invite them to the wedding? I mean, I don't think he even wants to, but I don't think I could sit there with his mother at the top table, looking in to the eyes of all these people who have called me every name under the sun. Do they deserve to be there?
Sorry for the long post!
