Honouring family members at the wedding that are no longer with us - ideas?

Hi there

Congratulations on getting engaged!!

I think its lovely that you wanted to honor your partner's mother ... we're doing a similar thing for the people we wish could be with us

It's nothing fancy mind, just a table decorated nicely with some of our favorite photos of them all and a plaque that says "We know you would be here today if Heaven weren't so far away" <-- shamelessly stolen from Pinterest!

We'll have some sunflower shaped cupcakes for that table, as they were my great-grandma's favorite, and probably some small-ish bunches of gypsophila in little vases

Not sure if this helps, but I hope you enjoy planning your special day
Best of luck

x

We have got a personalised candle from ebay for my dad and OHs aunt, i got one that could have 2 names put on with a poem, and this will stand on the cake table during the wedding breakfast then on to the card table during the evening xx

Congratulations on your engagement.

OH's Mum died 5 years ago and his only brother died 8 years ago. We acknowledged them by having favours from Cancer Research with a little card about them. We also did a toast to them during the speeches. We did debate having pictures of them or leaving a chair for them but OH would have found it too emotional, so it was nice that we included their memory but kept it low key.

Thanks so much for your suggestions, really appreciate that

They're all great ideas that sound very personal, which is just what is needed. I think I'll need to chat it through more with H2B and his siblings as I don't want to make it difficult for them. Just would like to have some reference to their mum with us on the day, even if it's just a subtle thing only we know.

I didn't even know you could get personalised candles! So clueless! I'll give it some more thought and chat with Mr A.

Thanks you

Congratulations on your engagement and welcome to Hitched!

Out of our 4 parents, 3 have died, so we certainly want to remember the others. We too will be having a memory table with framed pictures and a note similar to the one above, plus a candle in a hurricane lamp. It will also include pictures of my grandparents and a good friend who is also no longer here.

We will also be mentioning them in our speeches - my son is walking me down the aisle as my dad is no longer alive, so when I thank my son for taking over the role, I will also be mentioning the fact that he was asked to fill a very big pair of shoes, so to speak, and that my dad would be proud. That type of thing.

Finally, and this is a bit odd, I know, I still have some of my dad's ashes. Most were scattered, but I wasn't completely ready to do this and felt rushed into it, so we kept a small amount back and keep it safe. Most of the family don't know about it, they think the deed was done. My children and my H2B know, though, and we are going to wrap the ashes and put them in a locket which I will pin to one of the layers of my dress.....so that my dad can walk down the aisle with me. Only the 4 of us will know, and we will smile.

For everyone else to see, I will have a small photo on a bouquet frame, of each of our parents, which will be pinned to the stem of my bouquet - these are easily found on amazon/etsy etc.

Most of all, remember that there will be many times on the day when someone has a "moment" of wishing she was there, but they will be a mixture of happiness, love, and sadness. They will be there in people's hearts, and that is the biggest honour one can give, in my opinion.

Yes have a look on eBay I think you can get some that can have a photo on Xx

Congratulations!

We're going to have candles on the top table dedicated to our loved ones (Grandparents) who are no longer with us, we will also have framed photos.

x

Congratulations on your engagement! I think it is lovely that you want to do something for H2B's mum to remember her on your big day. I lost my mum when I was 9 and will be doing a little something to remember her by on my big day. In fact now I think of it there will be lots of things lol.

1. She loved yellow roses so I will have some of those in my bouquet and bridesmaid bouquet

2. I am getting married abroad and will be asking one of my guests to take my bouquet back home to hang for me until I get back from my mini moon. Then I am taking it down to the crematorium she was cremated at and I am going to leave it in the chapel of rest.

3. She loved Michael Bolton so I am having a phrase from one of his songs put on the front of the order of service - just about 4 lines that will suit a wedding. (I have found a couple of options). Nobody need know the meaning behind this but me, my sister and my dad.

4. My dad will mention absent friends in his speech but will keep it brief so as not to lower the mood (plus I will already be tearful enough haha)

5. My dad kept my mums engagement and wedding rings. When my sister got married she had the wedding band and some diamonds from the engagement ring made into a wedding ring for her. There are some of the diamonds left so I am planning to have those set into a 18ct white gold band to match my engagement ring.

So actually lots of little things there that are all personal to me that you are welcome to pinch if it helps

This is lovely - I filled up reading this, what a lovely idea.

I'll be wearing my grandma's earrings and hopefully my Nana's ring (although her fingers were massive so I may end up having to attach it to the bouquet instead). I do already have my grandparents' initials tattooed on my arm though, so they're always with me in a sense!

Reserve a seat by leaving a white rose on a chair on the front row at the wedding ceremony x

Wow, so many replies and such wonderful ideas. Thank you so much.

I love the idea of the bouquet frames. I'm thinking perhaps I could add those to my BM's (H2B's sister) bouquet so that she is there with her.

Thanks so much for all your suggestions, things in there I hadn't thought of so that's brilliant. I'll need to chat it over with H2B's family and see what they'd like to do.

You are all so brilliant! Thanks again

We will be missing 4 loved ones on our wedding day. We will be remembering them by placing photos of them in mini frames and placing them on our cake table around our cake.