I don't want a bouquet... I think!

Why don't you buy a bunch of flowers from the supermarket, tie them together and just walk around with them and just see how you feel? I know it won't be the real thing, but at least you'll know for certain then if you want one or not. I've not known of anyone who hasn't had a bouquet so I don't really know what to suggest. Give it a go - I was dead against having a veil before trying on one then I ended up loving it and wanting one you might end up feeling the same way about a bouquet - who knows!

BTW your dress looks lovely and i'm also not having bridesmaids either. You don't HAVE to stick to every tradition. It's your wedding do whatever you feel comfortable with.

If you don't want anything don't feel under pressure to have something. If you are walking down the aisle with someone you will have hold of them so to speak, walk back down the aisle with your new husband and you won't have it at the reception, so don't feel bad about it as they'll be sitting on a table out of the way moat of the night. 8'm considering not having one either, I'm not really a flower person. If you're interested look up where the tradition of carrying a boquet comes from (",).

Thanks for the reply (and compliment), Sam. I understand, I suppose we have these ideas we want/don't want something particular, until we try it!

I mean I have no qualms about having a bouquet - I just don't really see the point. It's an expense I could probably do without, it'll only be in use very briefly, walking down the aisle (30 seconds?) and for a few photos (in which case I don't feel it's entirely necessary). I've read a few things online about people not having bouquets, but most opted for some other kind of accessory - for the purpose of not feeling/looking awkward with their hands.

I'm curious to know if anyone else has had this thought (and if they did, what made them change their mind), or hear from anyone who's opted not to go for a traditional bouquet...

Ooof your dress is divine - where is it from??

I'm not having flowers I don't think. I am not into flowers at all, know nothing about them and wouldn't know how to hold them. I don't go about holding random items at any other time so it feels weird to do it on my wedding day. ? We are having a v non-traditional day too so I don't want to get things 'just because'.

I have to say though that the few people I have told have been totally horrified! So I may still get some at the last minute, in which case I will go to a local florist and ask them to put something together from whatever is in season. We don't have a colour scheme or anything so I would be happy with anything really.

Sounds like we are having very similar weddings!

How about a button or a brooch bouquet? I was going to make myself a button bouquet it was going to work out about £30 for everything I needed and something I could keep, but OH's nan has offered to pay for flowers and I'm now quite taken with the idea of a lovely fresh flower bouquet. Amazing how things change!

Jen-lou - SO glad to know I'm not the only person having that thought! Are you considering not having one simply as you're not a flower person or for other reasons?

Foo - I'm really glad to hear from you! I'd love to hear more about your wedding plans, how exactly you have gone against 'tradition', and most importantly - why? By the way, the dress is called 'Taya' by Ghost, in Nude. I got it from John Lewis but they have a wider range of dresses and colours directly on their site. Thinking of getting the 'Charlie' dress in either Beet Red or Emerald as an evening dress - take a look and let me know what you think.

I've read various reasons behind the use of flowers/bouquets in weddings - fertility being one of them (it's symbolic, means diddly squat to me), the other because people rarely washed (I think I am capable of having a shower before I wed). The symbol of flowers, or the background to why they are used in weddings, are not significant enough to me. People have said to me that at least to have a bouquet because "it looks pretty", but for me that's not really a good enough reason either. I actually do know quite a bit about flowers as I used to work in a florist, having said that, when it comes to myself, I just can't picture what I would want. As I said, I feel it's an expense I could do without, and knowing the true price of flowers to suppliers, I can't justify it. I haven't even told my H2B that I don't want flowers yet, so I do want an idea of what I might like, in case I have to compromise...

Otherwise, I have been looking at a small clutch bag, but I just wonder do I really want/need it?

Thanks for your replies so far, looking forward to reading some more!

Carrying a load of buttons around is even more random than flowers if you ask me. ?

They are gorgeous, a brilliant idea, and I think they work quite well as a substitute... but again, it's just not me.

What flowers are you thinking of? Decisions, decisions! Are you finding it an exciting or stressful experience with all this planning? Good luck Sam! :-)

Haha, actually you have a point there!!

I'm thinking as bright and as bold as possible for flowers. Going to a florist back down home at the end of the month to have a look, OH's uncle owns the florist so hopefully we'll get a nice family discount. (Won't hold my breath he's pretty tight fisted) I have no colour theme so anything goes!!

I must say I am finding it stressful, i'm having a small wedding only 25 guests max and it's been hard work. I'm on a very tight budget. Coming in so far at £1800 and for us there's been no compromises. A lovely country hotel, great views, lovely dress, 3 course meal and a wedding DJ. I didn't want a big, lavish expensive wedding. Would rather spend the money on my kids and take them on a fantastic holiday after the wedding!

Sorry no help on the flowers but just had to say your dress is stunning, so elegant.

I tried on a couple of Ghost dresses, they are beautiful. In one of them my sister gasped 'you look like you're in Downton Abbey!' ?

We are just having a v simple day - getting married in registry office in London followed by a meal/party in a nice bar. I suppose the non-trad things are that we aren't having bridesmaids or groomsmen, we're not having rings or flowers or a cake, we're walking down the aisle together, no favours, table decs or matching stationery etc. BUT I am wearing a wedding dress (Monsoon), we've booked a really fantastic photographer, we're having a first dance and a proper wedding disco! So we haven't entirely dispensed with tradition, just picked the bits we like and ditched the rest.

How about you? What/where/when??

I didn't want one, didn't want the expense or see the point (we didn't have flowers as centrepieces on tables etc). My mum persuaded me to have one and in the end I'm glad I did. Walking down the aisle I just didn't know what to do with my hands. At some point in the ceremony the registrar took it off me and my god, I didn't know what to do. When I look back on my (non professional) video, I grab my husbands arm, play with my nails then put my hand down...repeatedly. My ceremony was only 15 mins as well.

i ended up with a messy hand tied bouquet, well thats what I asked for. When I spoke to the florist I just said the colours I liked and whatever is in season so it wasn't too expensive.

you could always go for an artificial one and see how you get on?

I didn't want one, didn't want the expense or see the point (we didn't have flowers as centrepieces on tables etc). My mum persuaded me to have one and in the end I'm glad I did. Walking down the aisle I just didn't know what to do with my hands. At some point in the ceremony the registrar took it off me and my god, I didn't know what to do. When I look back on my (non professional) video, I grab my husbands arm, play with my nails then put my hand down...repeatedly. My ceremony was only 15 mins as well.

i ended up with a messy hand tied bouquet, well thats what I asked for. When I spoke to the florist I just said the colours I liked and whatever is in season so it wasn't too expensive.

you could always go for an artificial one and see how you get on?

See that is the thing I am most worried about - being fidgety! But in terms of 'walking down the aisle', I'm not worried because I'll either walk with my mum and dad, my brother, or my H2B...I don't think for us it will be any lengthy ceremony, I expect more a case of just signing some papers, but I still worry that I might sit there fiddling. I'm definitely going to ask about prices for a small, simple bouquet & look at alternatives (i.e. artificial ones), but I just can't get out of my head that for the short time they'll be in use, they're just not worth it...

I am hoping for something like this, I have a feeling that I might have some expensive taste picking something like this and that a hefty discount will be needed ☹️

We're planning a small break to Disneyland Paris (First every holiday) just to see how the kids cope, My eldest child has Autism so holidays/days out are always challenging if he copes then we'll go somewhere hotter and for longer possibly Florida!!

Your wedding sounds Amazing, I've just been reading it all. I love low key, relaxed weddings. Hope it all works out for you and welcome to Hitched!!!

They are gorgeous - I see no reason why you can't have something similar, at least in terms of colours - ask for that discount! If you want flowers then I think you need to have them as you want them to be, so fingers crossed you will be able to get something like that for your big day.

Well that should be an amazing holiday! At least it's something to keep the kids busy, hopefully your eldest will enjoy it, and it'll make for a relatively fun trip for you all. I suppose it's better to 'test the water', to see how you will all cope if you do another, bigger trip - though I'm sure it'll be great! Enjoy!

Thank you... It's really nice to hear from everyone & read all the threads!

Thank you!

Haha, that'd totally be me! See that also comes into it - will I look/feel awkward without flowers - will I look/feel awkward with them?! I just keep wondering are they really necessary. I see they can serve a great purpose in terms of stopping you from fidgeting, so ok, I'm stood there and everyone is looking at me - at least I won't be messing with my hair/dress/nails - but what about when he kisses me (crushed flowers?), what about when we'll sign the papers (put them on a table where they'll probably be forgotten and left - after which they're not even needed besides for photo purposes anyway). It's 50/50 - so in the balance of things, wouldn't I rather spare the expense?

I think a bag, if anything, will be what I'll go for (unless H2B really insists on flowers). Wrist corsage might be cute, hmmm!

Apart from not being a flower person, I just think it's a waste, I'd rather spend the money on something I could keep, I did debate a brooch boquet, but they can work out pricey. I think if you'll feel awkward carrying as boquet then don't have one you'll look more comfortable without one. Someone did mention ling stem lillies (sorry can't remember who and using my phone so can't scroll up) but that's a great idea. But, whatever you decide, don't forget you're not alone in your choice (",)

I love your stairs.

The dress is gorgeous. If you don't want anything to care then don't. Bouquets get bloody annoying after a while and actually you put it down after the photos never to be lifted again. Spend the money elsewhere.

My stairs? hehe.

Thank you!

Again, really appreciate your opinion on this. I felt a little alone with my thoughts and couldn't find that much on the net from other brides, so it's nice to have heard such a variety of opinions & ideas.

I know a bride who left her bouquet in the wedding car and didn't even realise till after the ceremony. So if you don't want one don't have one. The dress is lovely and if you do want something do with your hands a small clutch bag would be nice and you could maybe have a flower on it.

Hi Louise,

I think your dress is gorgeous too! Very classy.

Like Ravioli i was going to suggest a wrist corsage as you can get some gorgeous bracelets to attach them to.

As you mentioned, bouquets do keep your hands focused, you just relax your hands in front of you and dont hold the flowers up under your chin lol. Alot of brides place their bouquet on the cake table after the ceremony and photos.

I think with you working in a florist shop has hindered your vision, you know too much! Its so hard to choose what to have as theres SO much choice. It might be giving you a mental block(if i got married again i would have the same problem lol)?

Your dress would suit a small compact bouquet of orchids with maybe some roses, simple and classy

If you dont want to spend money on something that will only last a few days, why not have your bouquet made from artificial flowers? Use good quality silk and they are hard to tell from the real thing. Then pop them in a cute vase and you have a great talking point in your home for years to come :-)

I hope i've helped a teency bit!

Hi Louise,

I think your dress is gorgeous too! Very classy.

Like Ravioli i was going to suggest a wrist corsage as you can get some gorgeous bracelets to attach them to.

As you mentioned, bouquets do keep your hands focused, you just relax your hands in front of you and dont hold the flowers up under your chin lol. Alot of brides place their bouquet on the cake table after the ceremony and photos.

I think with you working in a florist shop has hindered your vision, you know too much! Its so hard to choose what to have as theres SO much choice. It might be giving you a mental block(if i got married again i would have the same problem lol)?

Your dress would suit a small compact bouquet of orchids with maybe some roses, simple and classy

If you dont want to spend money on something that will only last a few days, why not have your bouquet made from artificial flowers? Use good quality silk and they are hard to tell from the real thing. Then pop them in a cute vase and you have a great talking point in your home for years to come :-)

I hope i've helped a teency bit!

Your dress is stunning!! I'm making the bouquets out of pearls for myself and my BM

Thank you. Do you have any images of what you're looking to do for the bouquets? It sounds like a nice idea!

One of my brides forgot her bouquet back at the house.

If you don't want one I wouldn't worry about it.

Regarding the bag, I had another bride buy her dress from John Lewis and then blew the budget on Jimmy Choos and a Mulberry handbag. Option? ?

That would be me ? te he he

Glad i could be of help!

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