I'm stressing

Hi Hayley,


I think may be on a different stage of the wedding process to you? I’m on my 2nd wedding.My advice to you is remembering the day is about you & your fiancé & your life together. Don’t get sucked into what pleases everyone else it’s your day so spending loads on others that you end up paying for way after the wedding (potentially) not sure if that’s any help for you sorry if it’s not. Good luck x

As Hayley said the day is about you and your fiancé, you don’t need to impress anyone. I think as long as as your guests are fed and watered you don’t need a fancy venue. Hope you’re able to find a venue you like within budget x

If stress is due to being close to or over budget you could always slow down or plan other things whilst saving up a bit extra to give you that extra piece of mind. Planning a wedding together should be a good time together with as little stress as possible. Focus on what yous want and not what other people want.

Hi Hayley,

It's definitely overwhelming at the start! maybe jot down a few things that you both really, really want to help you prioritise (for us it was a venue with outside space, a good band and good quality but relaxed food / dining) - this really helped with budget planning. But agree - don't worry about impressing anyone else and if you need to have another 6 - 12 months to save do consider it or look into more DIY options- friends of ours have done that where they have been allowed to use a walled gardens / farm land and do it all themselves. It was a lot of work but they were fantastic weddings and low budget x

My partner and I are determinedly sticking to a tight budget and the main thing we've done is be brutal about what we want for our wedding vs what is expected and traditional.

It's helped us to cut some stuff out that didn't matter that much to us but would have otherwise taken us over budget.

You might differ wildly on what you want to keep but for example:

- I wasn't bothered about a veil and may not even wear a wedding dress. (Edit: I will of course wear some form of dress but not necessarily bridalwear. Not a nudist wedding, don't be alarmed.)

- We're not having a sit-down meal which also eliminates the need for table plans/seating charts/centrepieces/favours/table flowers (some of which are not strictly necessary depending on venue anyway, can be DIY'd or hired)

- I was okay with having dried flowers for a bouquet which can save money (Etsy if you're looking) and still look gorgeous (one of my friends did it and it looked great)

- Doing invites online - no fancy calligrapher.

- We stayed local for hen/stag/wedding itself. It's not for everyone but it's one hell of a cost saver.

Maybe sit down with your partner and go through the 'to do' list and decide what's a 'must have', what you really want/is important to you and what's just there because it's the 'done thing'. You might be able to make some cuts on 'the done thing' lists or find some workarounds if needed.

View quoted message We're now faith having the the wedding at my parents or his ❤ it's nice for the kids as they are somewhere they know

View quoted message Having the wedding at home is a lovely idea

View quoted message That plan has ended up down the drain as been told by few people it's illegal

View quoted message You could always do a registry office ceremony and then a reception/party at home?

View quoted message I've always said I will never get married in a registry

View quoted message Hi Hayley sorry that you are stressing, we have all been there but it will all work out!


Just curious what sort of wedding you are imagining? Would it be Church or a civil ceremony in something like a stately home?
Some registry offices are actually beautiful old building not the tv/movie image of a generic room etc. Also if you do that a day or so before for the legal bit just you and your partner, you could then have a celebrant led ceremony wherever you like which for you and your guests would be your real wedding