Just your typical metal bride

Ignore!!! smile and nod and ignore.

My mother is having palpitations because I'm walking down the aisle to Guns n Roses. I'm sure she has visions of me rocking out to Paradise City but I'm saving that for the evening. We've booked a rock band but they do pretty much what you mentioned, classic rock that pretty much everyone loves. Despite their protests I'm quite sure our mothers will be quite happy dancing round their handbags to a bit of Summer of '69.

My OH & I are also fans of festivals and the metal/goth/cyber/hippie scene (somehow it works lol) And he's a guitarist, bassist, drummer and vocalist currently bandless My mum would be absolutely against having this kinda thing at the wedding and would leave, seriously. Have you and your OH sat down and made a play list? Chucked in a couple of heavy songs and some on the other end of the spectrum, as you said, good ol' Brian Adams? And MADE her listen to some of it? Are you having a live band, DJ or laptop jockey? You need to reassure her there won't be a bunch of sweaty hairy men moshing to Scar Symmetry and the like. They will all be smartly dresses and well behaved!

A lot of brides have live bands playing these days, in fact having someone performing i think gets people up and dancing more. went to a wedding party last weekend and everyone danced for the band, hardly anyone did for the DJ. Perhaps you could convince them since is a popular choice nowadays with weddings and they're more entertaining than a DJ. Also some bands offer a DJ package for breaking up their sets and for when everyone is grabbing food and conversing.

to be fair most DJ don't always play chart topper anyhow. a wedding spans sooooooooooo many generations they'll a few but most will be old classic floor-fillers and such. And a good band will know how to cater to a mixed audience too

Could you possibly trick your mum by getting a DJ that plays rock songs? I think I may know someone, you could just disguise the playlist from her :p the songs you mentioned sound like good singalongs! Drop me an email if you want the contact details of the DJ

I'm an advocate of your day, your way. However rock music is an acquired taste that not everyone will appreciate particularly some of your older relatives I imagine.

Think of music like food some people are vegetarian and will require a special meal.

Although I agree that you should have what you want I do believe you need to give some consideration to your other guests too. The music will set the tone and atmosphere and if a large proportion of your guests hate the music it could have a detrimental effect on the atmosphere.

I generally HATE rock music but if I was a guest at your wedding I would get up and try to get involved have a mosh (if that's what the kids say these days??) but I'm not sure if I could keep it up all night which could result in me leaving your reception early if it got too much. I am sure you don't wish your guests to leave early?

If you are having a band(s) could you not stick on a few chart songs (even if that's more commercial rock music) via an ipod in the interval just to keep the masses happy?

ETA Hello and welcome to hitched!?

I agree that heavy rock should pretty much be left out of the playlist be it by band or dj as it may well make alot of guests feel uncomfortable.

However, you mention Adams, Springsteen and Queen.... Perfect party dancing music in my opinion!!! Great for getting bums off seats, lots of fun and horrendous catawaling from guests and ace photos as a result! This type of music is defo on my playlist and I had not even thought of it as rock at all- jobs at good ole party stuff.

We will be having erasure and Prince in our set list too as they were a huge part of my growing up- again, I just need to choose songs wisely....

I'm not sure Prince singing Darling Nikki would be a suitable choice post wedding lol!

As another poster suggested, put an example local store together and get your mum to listen to the tracks- how can she needed to like a bit of Bruce or Bryan?! (I think every mum has had a secret celeb crush on one of these at some point ;0) ) and as for queen?! Bloody brilliant tunes !!

Just to play Devil's advocate here; cheesy dance music, R&B and charty pop music makes ME feel uncomfortable (as a lot of the lyrics are pretty sexual / derogatory to women), yet it's what most people play at their weddings! ? ?

I'm with OP on perhaps omitting some of the more, ahem, 'offensive' bands lyrically- in particular Steel Panther...they are HILARIOUS...but lyrics I'm sure would make Great Aunt Fanny blush....

We've been selfish when it comes to music; it was one area we didn't want to compromise on- but anyone who knows us knows how important music is to us and would understand. Our tastes are more 90s indie / alternative, so a lot of Pulp, Radiohead, Stone Roses, etc, etc. which I suppose would be less objectionable than hard rock / metal for some poeple. But it's also about how well you know your 'audience'. We're having a quite young crowd at our wedding (only one grandparent and she'll be at home in bed by 8pm when the band comes on), who all grew up with the same music / tastes as us, so we're pretty confident it'll go down well. Even our parents are all pretty musical; OHs dad is well into his rock, etc...he used to play in a band himself!

Perhaps you could argue it like music is your religion / culture / way of life and thing that defines you. To have a wedding without these things would be like a Catholic being forced to have a Pagan / Klingon wedding?

Ha! Just realised I said this and then bigged up Steel Panther (I'm such a contradiction).....the difference is, their songs are IRONIC!

And R&B / modern music is just cr*p.

?

4 hours of death metal will drive most people to despair. 4 hours of Queen/Bryan Adams-type stuff will not (well, in principle, anyway - even three mins of Bryan Adams would drive me to despair).

We had a very strong musical theme to our day (all stationery/signage/place cards/table names/etc were songs/lyrics-based), although our musical taste is (usually) slightly more 'radio-friendly' than yours (Boy vetoed Closer by NIN, while I wanted to see what my older relatives' reactions would be; I did sneak in some RATM though). We had a DJ, and we banned cheese/disco/80s/R&B/etc. Our DJ was a producer/sound tech for a famous Manchester indie band, so he 'got us' without instruction (we did allow one or two slightly cheesy Irish tunes, given that half the guests were Irish).

So we had a night of indie blues rock and roll. And even my 70 year old Aunty danced to the Pixies!

Go with the classic rock. People will enjoy it more than your Mum thinks.

I hate most pop and dance music but I still get up and dance and have a good time at weddings, even if classic rock isn't to everyone's taste I'm sure people will make the effort to join in for your wedding and if it was me I'd sneak in a few of the songs I loved in there as well.

I've had a thought of, when people send back their RSVP's they could write down a song in particular they wanted to be played and I could give this to the DJ.

Good idea? Bad idea? Haven't worked it out yet, I can see my brother-in-law to be trying to put New Monkey or something on haha

This is a good idea.

My Mum is getting married next month, and has asked her DJ for 60's and 70's music. My 9 year old was mortified, and has produced a song list of things he'd like played.

Bit of Motown, then a bit of Marilyn Manson, as you do.

The only downside, is you may get odd requests. My 2 year old has asked for the Hot dog song from Mickey Mouse...

So glad someone else knows who Steel Panther are! My mum heard one song and she screamed "TURN THAT OFF" Haha

I think some of my granny's may have heart attacks if they heard it

I know I'll get odd things coming through, knowing half of my friends they'll be Bad Touch by Blood hound Gang haha!

And the Fast Food Song from the Eurovision years back!

As a Mum who loves to be on the dance floor anytime, I would find very heavy metal stuff OK in moderation but not all night. Brian Adams, Queen, Springsteen, are fine by me as you can dance to them but I would also like some Motown and Soul thrown in as well ? Most people in their 50's and 60's LOVE dancing and quite often weddings is the only chance we get as we're getting a bit old now to go clubbing ;-) although I still do on odd occasions! I would say go with your plans but if the dancefloor stays empty for more than 10 mins, pop some disco on and watch everyone jump up!

I think the rule is that if no one gets up that my bridesmaids and I will start a conga line until people move... Can't leave me on the dance floor alone haha!

I want everyone to enjoy themselves and have a good atmosphere, so I've got a band that will play alternative stuff that most people will hopefully know - The Killers, The Beetles, The Strokes etc. That way, we don't have to listen to cheese but people will still dance.

For our ceremony we're having music that we really want (even if people haven't heard of it) played by our friend on acoustic guitar. Maybe you could try this as a compromise. Afterall the ceremony is the most important part of the day so you should have it exactly the way you want.

Oh and by the way, I LOVE LOVE LOVE Phantom Of The Opera! I was in London friday night watching it at the theatre! Amazing!

We'll be playing proper shouty metal at our reception. And classic dad rock, modern indie rock, grunge, rockabilly, psychobilly, goth, Madchester baggy scene, hip hop, country, soul, jazz, blues...

All our friends and family know we have very eclectic taste in music, and will expect to hear a wide range of things. We're doing a kinda-jukebox using our tablet, so people can choose anything they like, off OUR playlist... mwuhahaha!

The thought of Bryan Adams in any form makes me weep.

If you want to go all out on a rock theme then do it- if thats whats important to you both, just understand that some people may not like it.

We gave our DJ a list of must play and never play songs. We had a healthy smattering of Indie mixed up with some Beach Boys and The Moody Blues (that will be my Dads choice with the DJ then!) as well as a bit of Lady Gaga and Wham thrown in for the pop loving side of me. Our banned list consisted of anything Black eyed peas/J-Lo/novelty songs/Girls Aloud/Take That - the DJ was a peach and stuck to it like glue.

The music IMO makes a wedding reception so you need to think long and hard about what sort of things you want.

I did this as I thought was fun. Got everyone to request 3 songs and then picked the best ones for the playlist, so we got final veto rights.

This is a great idea (consider it pinched!) OH is a techno DJ and I think a few members of our family and older guests are worried that we're going 'bang it out' all night so this might make them feel a bit more at ease. Only problem is, OH has a habit of remixing things to the point where they are virtually unrecognisable so their songs might get played. But not as they know it!

We're setting up a send space for all our DJ friends around the world to post up a 'wedding mix' for us. I can't wait to see what guilty pleasures they come up with! If it's a pretty random mix of awesomness then we might get OH's label to release it.

I hope your mum comes round to your style of music (even the techno heads would rather listen to metal than chart RnB!). I'm sure she will though coz it's your day and she wants you to be happy xx

If it's any consolation, we're pretty much playing every oasis song during the day (and the night!) with a bit of nostalgic 90s pop thrown in...oh, and some Nirvana ?

Also, with the mum-not-agreeing-situation, I'm just not telling mine anything! Little does she know that my bridesmaids are wearing converse ?

My bridesmaids are wearing converse too! They;re wearing kitten heels during the day but on the night time, they're wearing knee high black converse to match the rest of the decor!

I've come to the conclusion I'm having a hard rock blues band play, I've known them since I was in school and seen them play loads of times and they get any crowd going, even those who don't like rock music. So I think we may have progress here as my mum seems to like this idea. Oh and the hubby to be is in a band and their going to get up and sing a song for us. Which my family CANNOT tell us to not do cos it's what he wants

My bridesmaids are wearing converse too! They;re wearing kitten heels during the day but on the night time, they're wearing knee high black converse to match the rest of the decor!

I've come to the conclusion I'm having a hard rock blues band play, I've known them since I was in school and seen them play loads of times and they get any crowd going, even those who don't like rock music. So I think we may have progress here as my mum seems to like this idea. Oh and the hubby to be is in a band and their going to get up and sing a song for us. Which my family CANNOT tell us to not do cos it's what he wants

My bridesmaids are wearing converse too! They;re wearing kitten heels during the day but on the night time, they're wearing knee high black converse to match the rest of the decor!

I've come to the conclusion I'm having a hard rock blues band play, I've known them since I was in school and seen them play loads of times and they get any crowd going, even those who don't like rock music. So I think we may have progress here as my mum seems to like this idea. Oh and the hubby to be is in a band and their going to get up and sing a song for us. Which my family CANNOT tell us to not do cos it's what he wants

Hard Rock Blues band...... Now THAT I like the sound of!!!!

We ended up having our band do a swing/jazz set first,which dad and I both sang to, then the dj did a kid friendly party set. The band followed again with ska/funk and finally the dj was back on with a completely eclectic mix for the rest of the night.

It all went down a storm- tots ballroom dancing to jazz standards and 60somethings leaping around like loons to Madness! Oh and a massive conga line going, but I was so hyped I couldn't even tell you what the band were playing at that time!

So yeah, providing there are no lyricly offensive songs played, I would imagine your band will go down a storm! :0) xx

This is a great idea and has worked well at weddings I have been at.

If I went to a wedding and Steel Panther were played it would be amazing! Mainly just to see everyones reactions at the lyrics

I think it's difficult to cater to all, My man is a big rock lover and the music is in his hands, but I know he won't play death metal, and there will be no 'dance' music etc so good all round. I think most people can dance to and enjoy things like queen/milder rock anyhoo.

I love Bryan Adams! He will definitely be getting some airplay at my wedding - yes, Everything I Do is an extremely cliched song to have at a wedding so I will be avoiding that, but aside from this he has some great classics - Summer of '69, Kids Wanna Rock, It's Only Love, Can't Stop This Thing We Started....ah, I'm going to be in rock heaven when I present my DJ with a list for a bit of Bryan and some 80's hair bands needing to be played

We were originally having a rock band at our wedding, know them and they're brilliant and have a great following but they were booked for our day boooo.

Having a dj but he has an online planner and we have a password and put any amount of songs we want on it, our guests also have a password to add requests but we can see them and if theres any we really don't want we have the power to take them off LOL. I won't do that though unless it's something that'll be unbearable.

Having lots of stuff we like, red hot chili peppers, white stripes, rage against the machine,beatles, radiohead, 30 seconds to mars, kings of leon, queens of the stone age, Queen etc could go on forever. BUT we will also have a lot of motown, 60's / 70's, some pop thrown in for some and try and have a big mix for people.

Although its our day we want everyone there to enjoy themselves so going to have it as well balanced as possible, im hoping il;l be too drunk to care about dancing to lady gaga on the night

Loads I love that not having though, big slipknot fan and love loads of loud metal which I won't be including.
Also don't think my dear old nearly 90 year old gran would appreciate Crazy *** by Buck Cherry or Closer by Nine inch nails. Though it would be fun to see some reactions

Our DJ doesn't own anything 'modern'. We will be requesting that he plays certain classic rock pieces throughout the evening. Mum wants 60s/70s pop but then says she won't be dancing *rolls eyes*.

If its 60s/70s pop, I won't be dancing. I don't know of anyone in mine or FI's family who would object to classic rock.

Nice one. Which song?