Skip to main content

Post content has been hidden

To unblock this content, please click here

NumbNuts
Beginner October 2004

Less of a rant, feeling more positive about NHS...(updated with some answers and a plan)

NumbNuts, 15 December, 2008 at 23:54 Posted on Off Topic Posts 0 47

Before I start, I'm normally the NHS' biggest fan, but it's been a long and difficult day, in fact it's been a long and difficult month. And this story's not short.

H has a congenital heart defect, and for the last 4 years they have been monitoring his valves as they are leaky to see if they have got worse. About six months ago, they said they were v leaky and thought he might need surgery, but couldnt find his records to see if they had got worse. So he had more tests and they decided he did need surgery (despite then losing the intermediate records!)

So, back in December he goes on the waiting list for an aortic valve replacement, with expected waiting time 3 months, and expectation it would be around Christmas. Having not heard anything throughout Oct and Nov we assumed it would be after Christmas - not so, on 28th November at 5.20 pm (!) he got a phone call asking if he could come in on 15th (today) for the op tomorrow. So he's spent 2 weeks panicing clearing everything with work, I've done the same and we've had family organised to visit and help look after him when he's out.

So, he goes to his pre op last week. They discuss everything, do all the tests and all is fine for today. The valve replacement is listed as the procedure. He goes in with his dad at 2pm today, I get there at 3.30 having run some errands, to find theyve done most of the tests and he's joking with the nurses about having to shave his chest for tomorrow. About 6pm one of the surgical team comes to see him, and gives him a document about the procedure he's having and a consent form - but not for a heart valve replacement but for a T.O.E. which he'd never heard of before, and asked him to read it and theyd be back if he has any questions. So when they return, H asks why this has never been mentioned before, and if this is just a pre check. Erm, no, it appears this is what he's booked in for. So he explains the situation to the dr/surgeon (she didnt introduce herself) so she suddenly decides that "it had been shown to someone higher and they need to do this because theyve suddenly decided another valve is leaking more than it should and they want to check it" but she tries to get hold of the surgeon and his PA to find out if he's booked in for the valve replacement later in the week.

In the interim the anethisatist comes to do her bit and is equally mystified. The staff nurse thn comes back, and H is (unsurprisingly) getting more and more frustrated annoyed an agitated - when it turns out the nursing staff still have him registered for the valve replacement op and not the TOE, and they have no idea what is going on either. So she goes and finds another member of the surgical team to find out precisely what is going on. The guy who comes also has no clue, says H is down for the TOE tomorrow but is not in the surgical calender for the valve replacement. The surgeons PA has gone home (unsurprisingly since its now 7.30) and the surgeon is still unavailable - but he cannot find in Hs notes who, why and when they decided to do this TOE procedure (contradictory to cmments from the other member of the team). Oh and he's not actually booked in at a time to do it, theyre going to fit him around the other ops that are going on - so currently it may be 11am or 2pm! And they still havent got hold of the surgeon to definintely confirm hes not having valve replacement this week.

So H has psyched himself up for this major surgery, only to find out he's not having it and is likely to be back on the waiting list for the valve (or valves) replacement surgery. So our lives are even more up in the air than ever. He may;

a) Be home tomorrow having had this proceedure and be back on a 3 month waiting list
b) Be home wednesday having had this procedure, talked to the surgeon and be back on a 3 month waiting list
c)Have this procedure and stay in for valve replacement sometime this week
d) nothing or anywhere in between!

I'm struggling to cope with this, so who knows how H is feeling. I just wish he knew precisely the plan so he can mentally try to adjust again, at the moment he's in limbo.

(sorry, it really was long)

47 replies

Latest activity by ElizabethM, 27 January, 2021 at 13:30
  • Maxiletoe & Wine
    Maxiletoe & Wine ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Goodness, what an awful position to be left it. Don't know what else to say except I hope all comes clear tomorrow and the surgery goes well ?

    • Reply
  • Hippo
    Hippo ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    That sounds horribly stressful for both of you - it's a bit worrying that there is this level of confusion around something so serious. I hope the hospital manage to figure out what they're doing as soon as possible so that your H knows what's going on at least.

    I'll keep my fingers crossed that he gets both surgeries this week (assuming that's the best option?) (Imagine a Fingers Crossed emoticon here - there doesn't seem to be one!)

    (Hope it's okay that I'm replying - I'm usually a BT-er, but it's very quiet here tonight, so I thought I'd jump in!)

    • Reply
  • NumbNuts
    Beginner October 2004
    NumbNuts ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Reply away. Nice to meet you btw.

    It would be best they were both this week as we are all emotionally and practicably prepared for it, but sadly I think its the least likely option ☹️

    • Reply
  • Ethel
    Beginner
    Ethel ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    I commented on your FB status (i think) but just wanted to offer *hugs* here..

    • Reply
  • Crookshanks
    Beginner September 2007
    Crookshanks ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Awww... That is dreadful and worrying on your part and on the hospital's seeming lack of cohesive teamwork. I'd be livid in that position as it leaves you and husband dangling in the air for longer, which is unnecessary. Hope it gets resolved soon.

    • Reply
  • barongreenback
    Beginner September 2004
    barongreenback ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    That's really crap. Hope things get sorted out asap.

    • Reply
  • legless
    Beginner
    legless ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    That's really shocking, sounds very stressful, I hope they get it sorted asap ?

    • Reply
  • eponymous
    Beginner January 2008
    eponymous ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    ? no wonder you're stressed.

    • Reply
  • essexmum
    Beginner August 2009
    essexmum ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Thats really inexcusable, I really hope it becomes clear today once the day staff get in. Will keep my fingers crossed for you both.

    • Reply
  • F
    Beginner July 2003
    Fimble ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    What a nightmare, how frustrating and worrying. I hope you get some positive answers today and that the procedures go ahead sooner rather than later. ?

    • Reply
  • M
    Beginner
    Mwnci ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    ?

    I bet you were feeling pretty stressed with the thought of you H going in for an op anyway but add all the other crap (not to mention Christmas etc) and it must be bloody awful.

    • Reply
  • Fandango
    Beginner November 2007
    Fandango ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Oh NN ? What an utter nightmare for you both, is there any word this morning?

    • Reply
  • LouM
    Beginner August 2007
    LouM ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    What a horiifically worrying state of affairs numbnuts. I know how long you've both been waiting for today, and I am so sorry this has happened. ? With my sensible, dispassionate, head on, I think it seems more than likely that this is a very simple communication error, possibly as basic as an administrative oversight, at some level in the chain of authority. Of course, that makes it no less culpable, nor does it make it less stressful or terrifying for you guys. I think what I'm saying is I can see how it could happen, and you shouldn't worry about this being indicative of general competence. With my non-professional head on, however, and as your friend, I am utterly livid on your behalf and I would be going around tearing people's heads off right now if i was you. (not that I'd recommend this reaction btw- calm soothing reassurance is prob best for your H today). I really hope you have some clarity soon and get everything out of the way ASAP so you can both get on with your lives and enjoy all of the exicting new possibilities that lie ahead for you next year.

    I'm around all day if you want to chat. x ? I'll be thinking of you both. ?

    • Reply
  • The Grouch That Stole Christmas
    The Grouch That Stole Christmas ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Gosh, that really is rubbish. Like you I am usually a huge fan of the NHS, but you have every reason to rant and rave at this one. ?

    • Reply
  • Zebra
    Beginner
    Zebra ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Oh Numbnuts, that's dreadful, utterly dreadful.

    Fingers crossed that your best "scenario" happens for your H and that all goes swimmingly well for him. ?

    Make sure he complains LOUDLY until he gets a) to the bottom of the mix up and b) gets an apology and assurance it won't happen again.

    • Reply
  • NumbNuts
    Beginner October 2004
    NumbNuts ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Brief update as we are still really none the wiser. Consultant saw h at 11 last night and explained that in reviewing his notes on fri that he suspected the mitral valve may also be more leaky than suspected (although there is no change in his notes and the reporting of it over 4 years) and want to investigate and apologised for the confusion. However he.s not booked in for a time today, he.s fitting round other ops pm he.s been nil by mouth since midnight waiting! The consultant said that they would then look at the results and then organise

    • Reply
  • NumbNuts
    Beginner October 2004
    NumbNuts ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Surgery. So we assumed he would be out today or tomorrow. But then another member of the surgical team asked if he would rather have the op before christmas or in the new year. So it may still be on. Sorry for the split message, am on phone and it's hard

    • Reply
  • LouM
    Beginner August 2007
    LouM ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Hang in there numbnuts and keep us posted. Thinking of you. ?

    • Reply
  • Fandango
    Beginner November 2007
    Fandango ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Mate that's rough on you both. Hang in there as Lou says and keep us posted ?

    • Reply
  • Iris
    Beginner
    Iris ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Oh how stressful for you both. I really hope he gets sorted out ASAP.

    • Reply
  • Brontolo
    Beginner October 2004
    Brontolo ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    That's all seriously sh*t. If there's anything me or M can do, you know you just need to let us know.

    Take care and positive vibes and stuff coming for your M.

    H x

    • Reply
  • (Mrs) Magic of Christmas
    (Mrs) Magic of Christmas ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Oh NN, what a stress for MrNN and you. I hope he can get his operation and be out of limbo soon. ?

    • Reply
  • Michpuss
    Rockstar May 2004
    Michpuss ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Oh NN, what a mess. I hope it all gets sorted without stressing M anymore than he already is (and you of course).

    • Reply
  • Shiny
    Rockstar September 2005 Cambridgeshire
    Shiny ·
    • Report
    • Hide content
    View quoted message

    Ditto - we are free all week. Keep us informed. ?

    • Reply
  • NumbNuts
    Beginner October 2004
    NumbNuts ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Hi, I'm back with another update if you want to hear them?

    I'm slightly (well quite a lot) less fuming at the NHS now. It seems that my rant yesterday was largely due to a communications error (which is ongoing), but they have done the right thing postponing the op.

    His test today has shown that he also has a problematic mitral valve that will need replacing, possibly due to fever at some time in his life. They have also found out that his heart is weaker than they expected ☹️. However, bar doing the exploratory and speaky to MrNN for 2 mins as he was coming round, the consultant has been in surgery so we have no definitive "what nows". The chief registrar has visited and said H needs to stay in hospital for longer for more tests and to see more specialists, as the risk of this surgery is much greater than the expected one and they want to minimise them as much as they can. He doesnt think he will be operated on in this admission, but doesnt know how long he will be in, or whether he will be called back before christmas.

    So all in all, we're nowhere further forward, just now with a different operation!

    • Reply
  • *ginni of the lamp*
    *ginni of the lamp* ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    That sounds scary (and scarier than before). I really hope everything goes well xx

    • Reply
  • Kaz_76
    Beginner September 2003
    Kaz_76 ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Only just seen this, mate ?

    Hope you get some answers soon and that it all goes well. Will keep a look out for updates.

    Take care x

    • Reply
  • C
    Beginner July 2008
    choicey ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    How stressful for you all. I hope it all works out and he doesn't have to wait too long before it is resolved.

    Please keep us posted and sending you best wishes.

    • Reply
  • Peaches
    Super January 2012
    Peaches ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    Oh NN, how absolutely terrified you must be. I'm so sorry your husband is going through this, but from knowing someone who had similar heart problems (he was 32), I'm so glad your husband is in good hands.

    I really hope he gets the tests and relevant ops to put him on a path to complete recovery.

    ? for both of you

    • Reply
  • Zebra
    Beginner
    Zebra ·
    • Report
    • Hide content
    View quoted message

    WhatGinniSaid.

    ?

    • Reply
  • hazel
    VIP July 2007
    hazel ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    NN I somehow missed this yesterday - it all sounds very scary and pretty shocking. I hope you get the right answers today. Big hugs ?

    • Reply
  • neffi
    Beginner January 2012
    neffi ·
    • Report
    • Hide content

    ((NN and MrNN)) it all sound horrible. I hope today brings better news again.

    • Reply

You voted for . Add a comment 👇

×

Related articles

General groups

Hitched article topics