Maid of Honour Help!

I agree with the above......just ask her (in a non confrontational way) what she would like you to do. I'm sure closer to the wedding she'll need help with collecting items, organising seating plan etc...every bride has different expectations of their bridesmaids though so she may not need any of these done and different duties instead.

it's a pity it came to this though, as I'm sure you would've offered to do these things anyway, but by offering help in the future she may think it's only due to your chat on holiday.

just asking....was there alcohol involved when she brought up the subject with you? Not making excuses but may have just been down to the bubbles? Maybe she's beginning to stress?

Everything will work out in the end.....just continue to be supportive xxxx

Never been a MOH, but as a bide to be I know things can get stressful. For me, there have been times I want to tell my sister (my only bridemaid) she should be helping me with something - but then after my stress from that moment passes, I realise that she has not been a bridesmaid before and does not know what help is wanted.

If I was you, I would arrange to meet up with her - it is probably best to talk in person I would think. Explain to her how you felt about the hen party situation - that you thought the other friend organising it was her choice, so you did not want to upset her by arguing.

Let her know you are happy to help in whatever way she wants, but did not want to take over, so we waiting for her direction. It may be that the bride to be just wants a sounding board for all the little bits and pieces involved in thr planning. Let her know, you did not mean to let her down but, the maid of honor situation is new to you -and arrange a regular way to keep in touch over how she needs you to support her. If the worst happen, tell the bride that, although you hoped to support her how she needed, if she feels you are not the right person for the maid of honor position, you accept that decision

This!

And hello & welcome to hitched

Thank you guys :-D

In all honesty, my best friend has a lot on her plate at the minute as her sister is very poorly, and on this particular day we did get some bad news about her, then drank some red wine, so assumed it was a bit of a blow out on her part! However, I am so upset at what she said :-(

I have spoken to her, and she says she just wants to marry her fiancé and can't be bothered with who arranges what, holds what etc

i feel at a total loss. I agree, anything I do for her from now on, she will just think it's because of the talk we had. She's completely ruined it for me and I am now dreading anything to do with her wedding :-( xxx

I personally don't think you've done anything wrong at all x

But just ensure that from now on in you're regularly asking her what she needs/wants to make things easier and follow through with any requests if she has any. It sounds as though she too is dreading the big day and just wants all the pomp, ceremony and formalities out of the way. I too recently went through a phase of feeling that way when other aspects of my life weren't ideal....but I've got my wedding mojo back and I'm sure she will too x she'll get more excited as the day draws nearer...and I hate to say it, stressed too, but just be there so that she can never look back and say you didn't help her.

As a bride to be myself I looked back at when I was my sisters MOH and thought "wow I was rubbish!". I sent her a long rambly text apologising for not doing more etc etc but she replied saying she actually wishes she'd been less of a control freak and delegated more I wish I'd known of this website back then because I had no clue what was expected of me and so couldn't offer. But like I said, just be sure to let her know every so often you're there if needed for anything at all...she just needs to ask.xxx