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Beginner October 2024 Dorset

My mum feels left out

Jade-Lee, 23 May, 2024 at 20:11 Posted on Off Topic Posts 0 1

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Short back story, my mum helped a lot with the engagement was really there for my h2b. Since wedding planning she kinda back off a bit as much as I tried to get to her to come to wedding showcases etc she was either working or ill. My mum has been there for the wedding dress fittings and I’ve loved that time with my mum.

But since my mother in law to be has been buying stuff for the wedding and doing a lot for us. My mum has become feeling left out.
I’m not quite sure what to do, I feel a little in the middle. Any advice of how to proceed ?

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Latest activity by RomanticGreenStationery27135, 24 May, 2024 at 15:28

VIP July 2020 Monmouthshire
RomanticGreenStationery27135 · 24 May, 2024 at 15:28
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I'm not sure you can do anything - you've offered her opportunities to be involved, and she has taken up some of them (e.g. dress fittings) but not others. If her health and work hours are impacting her ability to be involved, it might be worthwhile running any remaining tasks by her, so that she has 'first pick' of what is left to do, but it sounds as if this is more how she feels than her actually being left out.
Sometimes, it can be hard for mothers to accept that their children are moving on. Also, if she is quite traditional in outlook, she may have expected that the wedding planning would be done 100% by your family - it's only fairly recently that the groom's side has become more involved.
All you can do is to keep offering her opportunities to be involved with the planning where appropriate and continue to reassure her of your love for her. Maybe try doing a couple of mother-and-daughter outings between now and the wedding, even if it's just for coffee. Anything to send the message that your mum still has a very big place in your life, even if you are also developing a relationship with your fiancé's family.
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