My sisters pregnant and hasn't told me

How very odd indeed. I must say though, if you haven't spoken to her since July then she may feel that you don't really care about her. How's she to know you've been round 3 times?

She'll have her reasons, and though it's hurtful, it really is her choice. It's a shame she's not been a little more careful how you've found out - but news does get out I suppose.

If she's 5 months now, she literally won't be able to hide it soon - so I'd leave it to come out officially when she wants it to. And then, my advice is to just congratulate her. A little late (not the same conversation!) you could tell her you're surprised it's so late, and you wondered if there was a reason she'd mind talking about?

It may be that there is a specific reason for not telling someone, and you're caught up in that because you know them and it would have nade it awkward for you.

I didn't tell my parents until I was 26 weeks (so similar timing to your sister now I think). In the meantime, it did make things awkward for my sisters who knew. I had my reasons for not telling my parents.

It's strange that she's told some people and not others... but at the end of the day, there are many reasons not to tell. There may be a gap in her family, but perhaps she lost a pregnancy before this one and isn't ready to tell yet (that was part of my reasons).

She's probably showing now - can you pop round again? She may have to tell you if it's obvious! But as I say - start off with congratulating her, and leave the questions til later!

It's a bit odd, but no odder than you not having her mobile number imo. I'd call her and have a chat, and try to arrange a visit, and then as MG says she'll more or less have to tell you.

Theirs be been someone there each time I've gone round i.e. BIL, nephew and my dad

This will be her 3rd child and with a 15 year age gap. I'm going round in the next week as I'm going away on holiday and don't want my dad to think something has happend if he can't get hold of me!

I got quite upset earlier this month when I went round for my nephews birthday as he was more interested in playing with playstation that talking to me, we stayed 10 minutes because he wouldn't turn it down or off and me and my OH were just sat on the sofa behind him doing nothing - we left and I was in tears on the way home because the family isn't a family anymore!

I think I'll just congratulate her and leave it as that (anything to not rock the boat). But it's really upsetting me and making me think "whats the point?", we're getting married next year and it'smaking me want to just abroad and do it with no family there!

I did have her number and email but then she changed her mobile and doesn't have the internet at my dads!

Maybe I'm being culled!?!?!?

My nieces are all more interested in Playstation and their DVD player than they are in their boring grown up auntie ? I get half a hug on arrival, when they notice me, and usually leave completely forgotten ? Chatting to me is boring - though they can be hugely engaged if we read together or do an activity. But as just another adult - bor-ing!! I wasn't there, but think it may have been rude of his parents not to stop it long enough to make him say hello - but crying over it seems a little extreme? (but as I say, I wasn't there - families are complicated!)

It's obviously upsetting you, so do ask her if you want to. Just keep it totally separate from your first reaction over it - which should be congratulations. Seriously... she may have had some complications early on - and then decided she wanted to tell you in person. I could have told my parents a good 6 weeks earlier than I did - but I decided I wanted it to be in person, and also wait for their wedding anniversary. Maybe she thinks it'd be a fun surprise to send you a birthday / Xmas card from them and 'bump'? Don't second guess anything - leave, or ask. But if you leave it, then truly leave it. Things are rarely as complex and sinister as our minds can work them up to!!

If she did the card thing - I'd be annoyed as she's always know thats what I wanted to do when I eventually get pregnant!?

I'll just leave it and if she's hasn't told me by December, then I'll ask her!

Re: nephew, it was only him in the house.

Families!!!!!

well to be fair, you don't have a monopoly on sending cards

and i personally wouldn't leave it until december, as you'll only get more wound up. ?

plus i'm far too bolshy. i'd be phoning up saying 'oi! you got something to tell me?' ?

You didn't say how old he is, but presumably teenage if he was alone. Sounds like normal teenage self centredness to me - and whilst it's bloody annoying, I wouldn't worry it's reflective of your not being a proper family - more like a normal family!

Look, totally ignore this if you like, not expecting an answer, throwing it in as an idea... your first post you said you were broody, and you've obviously thought about how to announce a pregnancy... and 'eventually' can be a really meaningful word, or mean nothing at all. Maybe there's a reason she thinks you'll be upset that she's pg and you're not - and she's just completely gone about it the wrong way by not telling you? I'm quite possibly throwing too much of my own background in here - but I know we've had people be unsure how to tell us, because it took us a bit longer than average, with a few issues along the way.

I should tell myself off though - didn't I just say things aren't usually as complex as we can imagine when left to our own devices? ?

Maybe it is just that she likes your idea about the card!

We're not trying yet, but it's not a secret that I've been broody for years! OH just wants to be married first!

I'm going to go round this weekend and see what happens, if I'm not told, then I'll wait till I get back off holiday! If I am told, I'll act suprised and chuffed to bits (which I am for her!) I was too young to understand her other pregnancies (age gap between us) so as a sister would love to be there as support etc

Thanks all for your input!

I'd be hurt too. We had close friends who didn't tell us until she was 36 weeks (he was our best man). There appeared to be no good reason - we'd moved out of the area so had only stayed in touch by phone, email and text.

It has effected the way I feel about them TBH and we've just let the friendship fade away. It's very sad though ....