No motivation to plan a wedding - help?

Yes I have been there! We avoided planning for a year because the guest list annoyed me and the idea of planning bored me. I enjoy dress shopping etc but I'm not one to sit down and research etc. have you thought about a wedding planner? It's not everyone cup of tea but it's certainly helped me as I just have to say yes/no and choose a,b,c for my actual wedding and it's made the whole process a lot calmer and more relaxed. We're planning the uk party but with the wedding taken care of it doesn't seem as important so again less stress

I suppose similar.I was motivated to set a date & venue etc but everything else for me has been a real struggle to motivate myself to do being lazy as hell.

I'm afraid your will to get married needs to be more than your resistance to put the work in.

Do you have the budget for a full on wedding planner? That could be one way to go about avoiding all the planning handing control to come one else.

Could it perhaps be that neither of you want you've agreed to do?

Another option is to get married abroad - I have barely had any planning to do because of this.

R reading your post I was also going to suggest a wedding planner...if you have the budget, I imagine they're not cheap! I have been lucky enough to be gifted the part services of a wedding planner who has helped with certain aspects of my wedding day, it's kind of half down to her, half DIY, and I have to say that the bits she's taken care of have been such a weight off my mind.

i was exactly the same though, booked my venue/church and found my dress and then just ran out of steam for months...then hit the six month to go mark and thought, 'oh crap, better get my arse in gear now!'

I would think it is quite a common thing, it's certainly happened with me, I put it down to being on a high and excited when I got engaged and then reality kicking in and suddenly thinking "oh ive got endless hours of sitting at a computer searching for ideas". It's that initial thought that's made me so lazy, searching is okay to start with but then it becomes such a tedious thing.

Ahh I never felt like this so don't have any words of wisdom really. Why don't you book a few appointments to see venues, maybe then you'll get the excitement to start planning?

Thanks for the replies guys, they're really helpful Getting married really is what we both want, I can't wait to be married to him. It's just all the samey venues and samey dresses and samey menus and guest decisions - maybe it'll be more exciting when we actually get started. I like the idea of a wedding planner though - does anyone have any experience of them? I'm just a bit worried it would be paying a lot of money just to have someone push suppliers that gave them the best commission.

I'm kind of the same hun. Ours is going to be short and simple and on a budget. We both hate being centre of attention too!

I hated trying dresses on and having read some of the stresses on here and having seen friends stress over the colour of napkin holders and stuff like, it makes me so glad we're doing it as simple as possible x

Whilst I agree with the wedding planner idea. There is something that struck me by what you said - 'the saminess'

Your wedding is your day, you don't have to stick to the same dresses, the same types of receptions, you can do what suits you as a couple. A civil ceremony can be held almost anywhere nowadays and then have something that you enjoy as a couple - tie in your interests, tie in what you like doing and wear what you want.

There are museums that are licenced for wedding ceremonies and catering - museums of different themes - if you are sci-fi fans for instance or into art. Even some cinemas are licenced to hold weddings. You can have a Yurt and have a fully outdoor wedding with games and a barbecue

It is at the end of the day - what you want it to be with a bit of a legal ceremony at the start that can last as quickly as 15 minutes.

I felt the same and still do to some extent. I'm currently on maternity leave with an 8month old, so he takes up all my energy in the day, so all I want to do in evening is crash. plus we need to get some stuff done on the house so I need to project manage that and his christening is in a month so needs to take priority leaving wedding planning down the list of things to do. I've always said I'd be happy to do a drive through wedding in vegas, as it's more important to me that we're married than the big day, but I still like the idea of a big party with loved ones, so I just need to get my butt in gear to do it.

For me the thing that got us (well really me, as fiancee is happy for me to do legwork and give him options to chose from) started was looking at venues and checking date with our church. Once date they were booked it made it more real.

We're getting married next May and so far have only sorted church, venue, photographer and make up artist. Need to get car booked and then I will forget about it for a while, as other things can be done later this year.

i would suggest starting with a discussion on when in the year you want to get married, what sort of thing you fancy and then ask around for suggestions of venues to go and have a look at them. Have a look on pinterest for ideas of themes, dresses etc. Once you get going you'll start thinking about it more which will then get you looking at more things.

You could try making a big long list of all the things you can possibly think of that need to be arranged and then decide what you need to do first and work from there.

So for starters - where do you want to get married? Look at some locations, including the registrars office if that's what you want, and find out their availability. Pick an available date, book the venue and the registrar if not too far in advance and then go from there.

Good luck!

The other option you can go down is complete DIY - we are doing this as we didn't like the menus having to use their suppliers etc but this is dependent on what venue you want. It also requires everything to be organised but we have chipped away at it and its not as daunting. The best thing would be to start looking at what you want then see venues and alternatives etc

I know this feel, and after a bit of looking on the internet or in magazines, weddings can all start to seem a bit cookie-cutter. But they don't have to be - I didn't have a traditional dress or reception, and I was very happy with our wedding. Maybe if you look at some less traditional weddings, you'll be inspired to plan your own!