No one is interested in our wedding :-( *rant*

I know it doesn't help much- but i'm interested *little wave*

your wedding is one of the reasons i'm sticking around.

chin up chicken- you're going to have an incredible day regardless of how people are behaving now- promise you hun xxx

Aww big hugs!!

i have the same with OH's family to be honest! The only people on his side who ask are his mum and step dad because I class them as my own parents and we're really close!

Id like to think that you'd be getting support from your family at this point. I also have 2 months to go and my fam are trying to be there for me as much as possible and bring me put of this lull Iv seemed to of fallen into.

Can you not invite some of them round for dinner and try wedding small talk, ask their opinions ( just for te sake of getting them to talk about things) so it's relaxed?

hope you get what you deserve in the end.

A hearty hear hear regarding those of us on here who are interested.

I've also organised my own hen btw.

Post a little flash! We're all interested!

You've told your dad what you'd like him to wear, just leave it be for a while. It's really easy to come by a black suit so maybe he's already looking into it but doesn't want to bother you with it?

As for sister moaning about your dress that's not very nice and just reflects badly on her. Tell her you find it hurtful and don't think it shows her in a great light. If she wants to continue embarrassing herself then so be it. As long as you like the dress that's all that matters. I'm sure you'll look lovely!

Maybe you need to sit the BMs down and say what you need from them (i.e. more support). Have you asked them if they will be organising the hen do? They may not realise that you want them to? give them a few options. That may help them along the way.

Chin up! you'll have an amazing day!!

Thank you all :-)

I would love to, but my parents won't come to my house because they don't like the rats.

I am considering organising a stag do for OH, I'm not too fussed really about a hen do, as the friends in question have already made it clear they are busy/broke, and I don't have much of a relationship with my sisters, but OH really wanted a stag do so maybe I'll concentrate on that and try and generate some good wedding karma!

CRL- if your h2b has a stag, surely you deserve something? it might perk you up a bit?

heck I'LL organise it if you want?

Huge internet hugs xxxxx we on hitched must become your audience! Tell us your plans. Give us a flash and let us be your hen party.

We ARE interested!

But remember, the most important thing is that you end up married to the person you love most in the world and he is interested. Treat the rest of them as scenery for your day which will be perfect for both of you x

Ditto what the others have said - but deffo in terms of your hen and stag do - you need to organise it yourselves. It's actually quite rare for someone else to do it contrary to popular belief.

If the softly softly, please could you help me, or, it would be incredibly helpful if you could this by then approachesx arent working then you need to get tough. It's not at all uncommon for people to lack interest. I don't know what it is but it's the very sad fact. I think however you do need to be a bit more blunt with them. Tell your Dad you need to know that he's sorted and make him tell you what he has got. TBH though, if you're insisting he wears a black suit then I think you should provide it. He perhaps thinks the same. Tell your sister your nephew is invited and you expect to see hin there, it's your wedding, not a night off for her. I'm sure other family members will help look after him. You could actually ask her if she's interested in your wedding or even wants to come because it doesn;t sound like she does. That usually get's people spluittering a bit. Call her bluff bascially.

Tell the best man he needs to pull his finger out with the music. Give him a deadline of say two weeks to get the music to you or he's fired.

Basically you need to take control in the areas where you have to know things are in hand.

As for people not responding to your dress etc - simply don't show them. Lat them wait until the day to see it all together. Show things to people who do care and will support you. If they moan - tell them why you're not inviolving them - ie, you didn't want to bore them as you thought they weren't bothered. That usually makes people buck up !

hth x

It must be hard when you feel like everyone is uninterested in the most important day of your life. I have many anxieties about my day one of them is people will loose interest, people won't dance, people will be bored and unwanted people will crash. We are all interested in your wedding so tell us all about it

I'm interested! ?

I don't have much to add, but I just wanted to say I'm so sorry that you're dealing with this Like Bekki said, you have your OH and that's what matters

Agree with Pammy.

It's lovely that you are thinking of organising your OH's stag, but I'd just have a word with the BM and try and figure out if he wants you to, or whether your enquiry will prompt him into action.

I agree about organising your own Hen. It is far more normal than you'd think, especially if you're not in your early 20s. Young ladies get all giddy about their first friends getting married, and like organising matching outfits and hitting nightclubs, and that's probably why the younger bridesmaids get more hyper about organising those types of Hens. Sorry to generalise there, I have nothing against that type of Hen, but I think those Hens are more of a modern phenomenon that us older gals sometimes don't go in for. Obviously I'm not stating a 'rule', I've personally seen 50-something bridesmaids go nuts for a girlie weekend in fancy dress, whilst a 23 year old cousin of mine had an afternoon tea party. Sorry, I'm digressing...... The point was, organise it yourself, just how and where and when you would like it. I also think that it's likely that your bridesmaids will show more interest in the wedding when it's suddenly 2 weeks away. Two months away just sounds like soooo far into the future for anyone who isn't the bride and groom.

You are obviously more hurt about your parents and sisters lack of interest / poor reactions because of your shaky relationship with them, and the history of your previous wedding. Tbh, for your own sanity I wouldn't keep trying. Just be happy planning with your OH. We dropped one of our two readings because the people we thought might do it weren't particularly keen on the idea. Glad we only had one in the end, as I think the other one might have been too much. Personalised vows are often more interesting for guests to listen to than readings.

I suddenly realised why you want your dad to wear a black suit I think. You said your dress is red and black, right? So clearly you are hoping he'll walk you down the aisle and will be wearing a black suit so as to look nice against your dress. So you're not "past caring", and are just trying to tell yourself that to console yourself. Understandable. If this is important to you and you can't just let it go, you'll have to explain the reason to your dad - talk about him walking the aisle, and the suit, in one go. Agree with Pammy that if he doesn't have a black one, you may have to consider paying for one for him though.

That's no problem, I am fairly sure he owns at least one though and short of raiding his wardrobe I can't get him to confirm one way or the other! Thanks for the positive replies though. Will share a little flash later :-)

I was deadly serious about offering to organise if you wanted? if not then we could all chip in suggestions which are cheap or free and plan something between us all!

That's very kind thanks, I'll see how it goes this end, to be honest I'm the worlds most introverted person and the idea of a big hen do terrifies me!

Quick flash of our ceremony room, bridesmaid dress, OH's jacket, my dress, my homemade bouquet and a mock up of our tables (minus our dining chairs!)

CRL I'm so sorry your family and others are being meanies!!??

I think you've had some great advice from others so don't have much to add, but with regards to your hen night (because we all should have one!) - if you're friends are a bit skint and you don't want a big doo, how about inviting the girls to your place and having a night in instead of a night out? Ask everyone to bring a bottle and make cocktails or just bring some beer/cider or whatever they drink. You can provide some nibbles and music....?

I love your flashes - I love a wedding with a difference! It looks SO striking! I'm in love with your BM dress and would love my BM to wear something like that but she just won't...! Your bouquet looks amazing too. I can't wait to see your wedding pics - it's gonna be FAB!

Forget the nay-sayers and enjoy the rest of your planning xx

Having seen your flash, I have decided to say - SOD EVERYONE ELSE!! I WANNA COME!! Your little insight made me wish I was having your wedding (H2B would never go for that though).

You will have an awesome special day and you will look amazing.

x

Having seen your flash, I have decided to say - SOD EVERYONE ELSE!! I WANNA COME!! Your little insight made me wish I was having your wedding (H2B would never go for that though).

You will have an awesome special day and you will look amazing.

x

Nothing new to add really, but like many of the others, I'm interested in your wedding and your flashes look fabulous. I do feel for you though having no one to really share your excitement - hopefully when it gets a bit closer people will get a bit more interested, but if not just remember it's only really you and OH that matter.

Just to add to the hen do comments, I organised my own - it never even occurred to me to leave it to anyone else to sort out as I'm the only one that knows all the people I would have wanted there!

Love your flash - I think you've done a great job to create a whole theme that ties in. OK not to everyone's taste but you know that and that might be part of hte problem with your family but hey ho. If people know you well enough surely it's only what they'd expect. You weren't ever going to do the traditional white wedding, and why would you - it's not you. Well done! x

Lovely flashes, you have tied in the theme really well

we are all interested in your wedding!

Ditto to all the advice you've had so far!!! My 2 penne the worth = sod em!!! I know it's hard not to sit and start to resent paying for guests who aren't interested, but you need to focus on the fact that this is the day you and oh want and it's you two that are important!!!

love your flashes btw!! What a gorgeous ceremony room and dress!! It all ties beautifully!!!

P.s I think you should cancel their invites and invite us instead :-) lol xxx

Your ideas look fantastic and we are all excited for you!

The thing we all have to learn to accept is that our wedding day is OUR special day and we can't expect people to get excited. One of my bridesmaids has shown very little interest but I accept that because while it's the biggest day of my life it isn't th biggest day of hers.

Regardless of how everyone feels about your day it won't change the fact you'll have the best day of your life and be married to your love. That is all that matters

Ditto to all the advice you've had so far!!! My 2 penneth worth = sod em!!! I know it's hard not to sit and start to resent paying for guests who aren't interested, but you need to focus on the fact that this is the day you and oh want and it's you two that are important!!!

love your flashes btw!! What a gorgeous ceremony room and dress!! It all ties beautifully!!!

P.s I think you should cancel their invites and invite us instead :-) lol xxx

Your wedding looks fabulous! Love the bridemaids dress - where did you get it from - my MOH would really like a fifties inspired dress. Your bouquet if amazing if I didn't already have a florist you would be making mine (no you wouldn't get a choice!!

I'd already seen a flash of your dress on a previous thread and it's fantastic. So dramatic, you will look stunnning.

As for the family/friends. If you want your dad to escort you down the aisle then ask him and explain why it's important he wears a black suit. If he still doesn't play ball, tell him you'll ask someone else - and mean it.

Your bridesmaids sound crap - sorry. They may not be up for organising your hen do but they seem to also be making excuses as to why they won't be there. Do you have other girl friends you can plan an evening with? If not, how about taking a risk and meeting up with a few of us - whoever is reasonably local. You only make new friends by meeting new people.

Have a word with OH best man and give him a kick. Hopefully he will get the stag do sorted and give him a deadline for the music. Explain the role of the best man is to help if he can't help then what makes him a best man?

Don't let others stress you out. I know its easier said than done but when it comes to it, none of this will matter when you get to marry the man you love.

I too love the bridesmaids dress and bouquet - I'm kind of jealous of your wedding. Even though my wedding is so completely different, my inner goth loves all that dramatic black and red!

Ok, my opinion (for what it's worth) is to elope. If you can recoup most of the costs you've already paid then just take off with OH. Your wedding should be a wonderful, stress free day that's about you and OH. It's not on for you to feel so sad and I bet you'll spend the day still fretting if you do go ahead with a wedding with your seemingly non-caring friends or relatives. If you can pick a few that you really do think care and want to be there on your wedding day then elope with them too! Either way, it seems like you've got a lot of support from people on here so you're not totally alone. I hope it works out xx

This

I wanted to elope but OH really wanted a 'proper' wedding. I think we're too far down the line to cancel now, tempting as it is. If our friends and family were as supportive as you guys it would be much better. Going to try and pin everyone down at the weekend and get some enthusiasm going!

For what it's worth I'm interested too.. looking forward to your flash X

Can I add my 'I'm interested' to all those who have gone before.

I know how it can feel to be so alone in your planning, although for me it's due to physical distance and OH's illness that so few people are involved/helping. I loved your flashes (I now get why it was so important for your Dad to be in black), can't wait for your report. oh, and I won't be having a hen either, no-one has offered to organise me one, and with only 2 weeks in the country to finalise wedding plans I can't be bothered with organising one myself! For me it isn't such a big deal, although there is a teensy bit of me that would have loved it if just one friend has asked if they could plan something.

Flashes look fab! I'm sure it'll be a great day whether you stick with what you've planned or elope :-)

Looks like you've put heaps of effort in and really ties together well. Good luck!