No one to give me away

My son is 2 and a half. I think that's what I'll end up doing. The worst of it is knowing that I would have all this if my dad was still alive. I miss him more then ever knowing he isn't here for my special day, and then my mum shows no support whatsoever. There's no way she would be like this if he was still here. And no way my brother would get way with talking to me like that either.

Am I missing something? This is about shelves?

Your family are clearly drama-lamas. I'd walk down on your own or with your son.

My friend made the decision to walk down the aisle by herself and no one batted an eyelid.

No, you read it right. It is all over shelves. Pathetic isn't it?

It is a bit. You're best ignoring them.

Friends of mine got married and on principle, she wasn't given away... To her, being handed over as a possession was really insulting. I can sympathise with that view, even if it's now just a symbolic thing. Walk proudly on your own, or you could do what they did, which is walking in together.

I'm sorry to hear your family are being like this. Like you said, your brother doesn't deserve the role of giving you away if he's going to talk to you like that. If I were you I would walk down with your son, or if he's the type that might get shy or hyperactive I would walk alone.

WTS I'd walk down with my son or on my own.

Another vote for your son or on your own, I would tell your brother to stick it in terms of giving you away! On the flip side, Are you still planning on having them at the wedding? I only ask because you dont want to end up regretting not having them there in the future specially because it seems to be over such a stupid thing that they both may come to regret saying in the future. Obviously the decision is totally yours but I think it is something you do need to think about once everyone has calmed down.

I'm so sorry that this happened to you and so soon before your wedding.

Your brother doesn't deserve to give you away for talking to in such a way over shelves?!?!

Walk proudly by yourself down the aisle, know your Dad is watching you and supporting whatever discision you make.

What a nightmare! I'd be walking down with my son or on my own! I read somewhere that one bride waited at the top of the aisle - H2B walked up to collect her - and then they walked down together!

It depends how traditional you feel you want to be!!

Swampy

My mum has now kind of apologised, although how long that will last we will see. She is still sticking up for my brother though, which is really annoying me. There is just no excuse for how he spoke to me. My mum will be at the wedding, my brother on the other hand, I really don't know. Right now I don't want him anywhere near me. Thank you for your messages, so nice to have all of you to talk to xx

Sounds like the shelves issue was a trigger factor which let out some deeper feelings. My family can be like that - my mum actually recently said to me that if she thinks that she'll cause an argument with her opinion then she keeps it inside. Ok, so there's no argument at first but then later on down the line if a smaller issue occurs, everything gets let out in one go which is so difficult to deal with. Does that sound familiar to you? I had a recent issue with my own family which is not as bad as what has happened here but similar, however my wedding is 8 months away so I had time to let everyone cool off and then speak about it. I'm sorry this has happened so close to your wedding, I really feel for you.

As your wedding is three weeks away I would do what everyone here has suggested and walk down the aisle with your son. Even if your brother ends up apologising profusely, it doesn't change the fact that he spoke to you in the manner that he did and he doesn't deserve that honour. As for him being there as a guest, what's your relationship been like in the past? The reason I ask is that my sister and I had a massive blow up recently and I almost fired her from being a bridesmaid and said I didn't want her there. However we usually have a close relationship so I know that if she wasn't there or even as a bridesmaid I would end up regretting it. I think another poster has already mentioned something similar. I'm not suggesting that you should definitely invite him, by the way!

I hope you're doing ok. Xxx

Another vote for walking down the aisle alone or with your son.

I think I'm going to be walking down the aisle on my own too. My dad passed away a few years ago and for me he isn't replaceable... I'd also like to think that he will be there so don't want to put someone else in his place.

I lost my dad when I was one, and will be very proud to have my brother walking me down the aisle cos he's always been there for me and looked out for me, but if he acted like yours has then he would be counting his lucky stars if I ever spoke to him again, and my mum could poop right off too if she so blatantly took his side. If I was you I would be very proudly walking down with my little boy either just infront of me or holding my hand alongside me. I really hope they calm down and none of this rubbish behaviour ruins your day x

I am so sorry you're going through this, I am having the same with some of my family. Another vote for your son here. I'm having my son and daughter give me away, and think its a lovely alternative xx