OMs - what are your wedding regrets?

I do love the flip flop baskets that have been at weddings, but I'd been thinking of not doing it. Perhaps I will..... Will totally depend on cost and how we're doing closer to the wedding, money-wise!

This is a great post for upcoming brides. I have been considering a flip flop basket and now I'm considering it even more!

Excellent idea Kharvo!!

I was the same about basket in the bathroom so I am gonna do one of those.

I can't decide whether to do a flip flop basket or not. I can't dance in flip flops at all so think that's putting me off a bit

Great idea. I regret not having a wedding video done. I also wish I had realised by hair is not for curling and I should have left it straight . On a practical point of view I wish we had made more time for photos, I should have printed out all the emails and contracts and taken them with me as both the hotel and hairdresser queried prices and it was stressful. Lastly I wish I had made sure to have a bottle of water in the car on my way. Apart from that it was perfect

I would take more advantage of the time that you have together with the photographers. Although we got some lovely photos on the beach, just me and H we only spent about 10minutes there. And I shouldve been bossier.

I almost broke my ankle at a wedding in a pair of free flip flops on a drink soaked dancefloor! ?

My only regret is not speaking up when the registra c@cked up and I didnt say any vows. But I can always say to H "well I didnt make any promises" !!

At first i regretted not having a video but someone mentioned that when watching theirs they noticed things that weren't right or had gone wrong that they wouldnt have known about so Im kinda glad I didnt.

Oh and I would have thought more carefully about one of my b.maids before excitedly asking here. she may have been better off in anotehr role!

but nothing major, I tend to look back on it and have happy feelings about everything we did and didnt do!

Oooo great idea Kharv! I'm kinda the same about a wedding video but we just couldn't stretch the budget to it so I just need to make peace with that! I did love my dress but it wasn't 'the one'. It was within my budget and beautiful (I even got a joint third place in the H awards! ?) but I look back at other dresses and I wish I'd just pulled back elsewhere and got something that was exactly what I wanted! I handmade almost everything (including canapes etc) and perhaps wish I'd taken on a little less. Nothing like still stacking your wedding cake at 8pm the night before you get wed!

That is an excellent idea ?

I've thought about this. My MUA asked for £50 deposit, then 50% on trial, and 50% on day...

I can just see it ending up in disaster as she doesn't seem too on top of things.

I'm going to take my 50% to the trial and write whats been paid / what will be paid to make it perfectly clear!

1. I wish I'd been a bit more methodical and sensible about random purchases, especially for decorating the marquee.

2. I wish I hadn't "forgotten" about my budget spreadsheet after booking the main things. Keeping track of all the small things really makes a difference.

3. I wish I'd spent more time at our home party mingling and thanking guests for coming, rather than sticking with my friends all night.

I'm sure I'll think of more later!

For the actual wedding, I wouldn't change a thing. Regarding the reception, I probably wouldn't have bothered having one if I were to do it again. And if I were to have one, I wouldn't have had a guest list, so to speak, I'd have put an open invitation to anyone and everyone. I was so worried about exceeding capacity that we didn't invite workmates until too late when they couldn't get babysitters or book leave, whereas lots of people we were sure would attend didn't due to holidays or ill health. Either that or our reception would simply have been dinner in a nice restaurant with immediate family only.

Apart from the fact that I wish we'd just eloped? ?

The only thing I can think of is I wish I'd asked the caretaker if we can pay some extra money and have him clean the hall.

My poor family had to clean the hall at the end of the wedding, and my MIL had to go back the next day to finish up. I wish we could have just given the caretaker an extra 50 quid and asked him to do it himself.

Regrets hmm... it's hard as it was such a good day. But probably not getting it confirmed in writing that the caterer knew OH and guests were allergic to nuts. Even though she told us specifically she knew and wouldn't put nuts in anything, she actually did out nuts in loads of thhe bread and claimed she forgot his allergy. Then later she claimed we hadn't told her. So we had nothing in writing that said specifically 'no nuts' (except the menu, which says only 'bread' and not specifically 'bread with no nuts in' and the dessert list (which apparently counts for jack as she added the nutty Florentine's as 'an extra' and weren't on the menu at all.)

So tip - get every last little thing in writing, even stuff you wouldn't have thought about. Such as 'if the caterer goes off menu, there will be no nuts in any food'.

THIS ^^^^^ with bells on. I have no photos of me and my mum and hubby never had any taken with his daughter.

Also wish I had taken time to eat something, we had an informal day with loads of lovely chillis, currys and hog roast neither of us ate a thing!!!!

I put this up initially after I came back from my honeymoon and it still fits! not necessarily regrets but points of wisdom

Hi all,

just thought I would share some points of wisdom/observation for you Hitchers now that I am an OM.

1. Video!! I’m so glad we got one done and it was only a family relative who did it!

2. The little things really dont matter! dont go overboard on table decs or favours - the tables look lovely with minimal decorations and favours etc, a lot of favours do get left behind (even our venue said the night before - A LOT of nice things (small bottles of perfume/drink) are just swept away and thrown in the bin. I also bought some table trivia for the 5 tables and some box of jokes for the children - none were touched - everyone just chatted!

3. I forgot to bring items on the day - gimmick stuff for the BB act I had, my daughters pashmina, bits for the next day - it really doesnt matter, nobody noticed but me..!

4. try and get 5-10mins with your OH at some point during the day apart from the 1st dance - it goes in a absolute whizz! and just get some together time.

5. The important things to your guests are good food, being warm, something to drink,(this is where the most money should be spent on) and just being there with the 2 of you to share the day - everything else really, really doesn't matter.

6. The party happens where you are, so try and stay in the function room as much as possible! I was on the dancefloor all night lol

7. I was looking at disposable cameras, CDs, plantable seed favours, table runners, swags... more chocolate and sweets etc and it would have been a complete waste of money.

8. Smile x

Would also add definately get the phots of everyone that you want. Including your grandparents if they are still alive. These are the memories from the day and if you miss out on this opportunity its forgotten. I only have 1 of my hubby, me and my daughter but should have had more done but its a good one

make a list of photos and stick to it

Kharv would you have had a flip flop or a slipper basket? As someone mentioned a few posts ago they slipped on a drink as they are quite slippy...I saw a slipper basket...Good or bad idea?

x

I got married at 4, I would change this to 3.

I would have a videographer. I asked my friend to record the speeches but his camera had a problem and missed my dads. This upsets me.

I would have done a list for the tog, we don't have a photo of us, my parents and my brother together, it's all separate.

Aimz I probably still would have had a flip flop basket purely because they're much cheaper to buy than slippers! We had a lot of guests so definitely wouldn't have been able to buy slippers.

I forgot one . I really wish I had taken a sleeping pill for the few nights before as the bags under my eyes were truly horrendous and I can see them in almost all of the pictures.

Why did you regret the toastmaster? We have booked one as we dont have anone to run the day as such. Are they not worth it?

Ha only that I wished I had grown my hair longer as now it's longer it's looking a bit more dramatic.

Also, that I hadn't been so stressed with organsing stuff prior to the wedding. It wasn't that bad, but I'm rubbish at admin and hadn't properly become addicted to Hitch yet so didn't use all the amazing resources from this forum

I loved every moment of my wedding - we started at 2.30 and finished at 12pm but it honestly felt like the whole thing lasted 90 minutes. Amazing. Don't stress about the small stuff.

I also really appreciated how lucky I was to have my dream, fairy tale wedding, and that my Grandpa was there, as I didn't think he wiuld be well enouygh to attend, or possibly even still with us.... ha sorry Kharv I've gone off on a tangent and off your original question. I guess I am trying to say don't sweat the small stuff, saviour every second, it's all about the people sharing in your day, being together, good food and wine (oh and getting married and stuff)

Ashlil, great points, really well made.

I'm battling at the moment with budgets for table decorations, I've already decided to ditch the idea of favours and have gone down the route of using pebbles painted with people's names and the date of the wedding as placenames, which they can take away if they so wish. But I'm still wanting the marquee to look dramatic when you walk in. Your post has made me wonder if that's really so important - at £30 per table for the centrepieces, 22 tables, that's a big chunk of money, and that's before the little bits to dress the tables. All of which won't even be seen once the food's on the table.

Mmm, you have really got me thinking about what's important!

x

I regret not stopping to eat any of the evening BBQ or the fabulous cake (which so many people have told me was lovely).

Looking back I shouldn't have worried so much about the table decorations and little bits and pieces - but again I got lots of compliments on the little touches so I don't feel they went unnoticed.

The best piece of advice I was given before hand was to consciously take a few moments throughout the day to spend with your H and take everything in as it goes so fast. We did this in the car on the way to the venue, when we were waiting to be announced before dinner and at one point during dinner - it was lovely to look out and see all of our guests enjoying themselves. Even so the evening whizzed by and it was bedtime before I knew it.

Ooh just remembered an almost regret - we decided at the last minute to have photos of just the two of us on the beach after the ceremony. I didn't think there'd be time but the Togs assured me it would be ok and I'm so glad they did. They are some of my favourite pics and it was really nice to have the time just the two of us. I'm sure I would have regretted not doing it.

Oh wow, I can see why this is a good idea.

I'm planning on having wine night before wedding as it makes me sleepy... but I'm already having sleepless nights because of wedding and worrying about little things (and crazy wedding dreams!) so I think I'll definitely need some help!

I would say choose your suppliers very carefully

other than that, nothing at all. I maybe would have chosen to get married an hour earlier to have more time with our guests, so 12pm instead of 1pm.

I echo this and my wedding is still 6 months away.

Not having a good experience with photographer, making me extremely nervous.

Mine is that our stupid photographer didn't get a photograph of one of the most important parts of any wedding day. Me and my lovely Dad walking down the aisle. It still makes me cry now, its not like I can do it again. There is only one photo in existance of that moment which is this one that my cousin took which we have had to put in our album with all our pro ones. We did a list but you dont think you will have to write the obvious pivotal moments down. Still makes me so angry now. Stupid twunt!

Another one agreeing with the key shot list. I always insist on a list. I also ask for time alone with the B&G either before or after the ceremony. It's not just for my benefit, it's nice for them to have a few minutes alone time to soak up the moment. Their day passes so quickly.

Not everyone wants to give me lists or their time, but I'd rather give them the option to have these things than be on their list of regrets afterwards.