OMs - what are your wedding regrets?

Just trying to bump this post up- with the wedding fast approaching I need to re-read this post! Lots of useful advice!!

Any recent OMs with some new advice to us soon to be newlyweds??

Loving this thread, making a list immediately of photos to be taken, shouldn't be too hard as it's just me and OH at Gretna in just under 3 weeks. Ahhh!!!

Very glad I've booked a videographer

I have a couple of regrets but nothing that ruined my day!

1. I wish I'd taken more time walking down the aisle it was a bit rushed

2. Having someone video the speeches - we didn't have a video and I'm not bothered but everything was such a blur & I have a couple of amateur videos of bits of the speeches & listening back has bought it all back!

3. I wish I'd eaten more food! We had an informal BBQ & I only had a small plate of food as I was mingling so much! I wish I'd grabbed a plate, grabbed my hubby and gone back to our room for 10/15 minutes!

In the end the small things just don't matter, I had the most amazing day - I loved it from the minute I woke up until the minute I went to bed xx

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Are you at the Original Famous Blacksmiths Shop? Make sure you post flashes!

Fantastic post, got some brilliant tips!

Have loved reading this post - got me thinking about lots! Please keep em coming :-)

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I'm providing spa slippers instead as i hate flip flops and any left over i can use.

Great thread!

Have added videographer to our list and consulted my groom lol! I think I will regret it if I don't.

Some from my first wedding:

*Not being stricter with the hairstylist. They insisted that we come to the salon, and completely underestimated how long our hair would take (even though we told them it would take about 2 hours to do the style we wanted based on our previous experience of styling our own hair), so we ended up having to race back to my house to get ready.

*Inviting pretty much everyone we knew to the evening. There were so many people there that my ex and I ended up spending the entire night away from each other making sure that everyone was spoken to. It also meant that I didn't get to dance and I only had one drink all night.

*Not popping away from the wedding to see a friend who was very ill and passed away a few months later. We didn't realise how badly off they were and although I intended to leave the reception after the wedding breakfast to see them, on the day everything went past so quickly I completely forgot.

*The TOG we chose. He didn't take a lot of the shots we asked for, he left before we'd agreed, and he was so arrogant that some of the groomsmen actually left the wedding venue to avoid punching him. Somehow, we were unaware of a lot of it until after the wedding, but I do wish we hadn't booked a TOG on impulse.

Guessing there are advantages to being divorced (other than that if things hadn't worked out this way, I wouldn't have met my amazing OH, of course) - this time, we're paying for everything ourselves and having exactly what we want. We have made some compromises, obviously, but none that we feel forced into, and when OH asks me "what about [x]" I can explain to him exactly what the pros and cons for us are. So, in that sense, I suppose I don't regret anything. *existential crisis at 12:30am...*

I got married on Wednesday and I'm still kicking myself that I didn't take my veil off til after the TOG had gone. It was a beautiful cathedral length veil and I was so enjoying wearing it that I didn't want to take it off til quite late. But it occurred to me the following day that I didn't get any good pics of my dress without the veil ?

But apart from that it was perfect and I have no regrets, so I guess if that's my only problem then I should be pretty pleased!

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As a om I probably give you the tip of either don't bother with the baskets or make them very much known what they are and that people can take them. We did toiletry baskets and they wasn't touched (possibly because people didn't know what they was)

I'm not one for regrets and we had an awesome day, but there were a few niggles...

We should have more focussed hands on deck for the DIY decorating the day before. It still wasn't finished the next morning and bridesmaids were running around on a warm morning with make-up sliding off faces. We spent a stupid amount on a lot additional loose flowers from the wholesalers (H2B's idea!) which took FOREVER to arrange...it did look fab though!

My bouquet wasn't as big and loose as I had expected, but by that point, I really wasn't bothered - it was still beautiful.

There were certain people who got invited (under family etiquette) who shouldn't have been and actually barely stayed - listen to your gut! Have who you want there!

I wish I'd set up nice bell tents for people to stay, so we could all sit on hay bales around the firepit toasting marshmallows for longer. There were so many I didn't get to speak to properly.

Mainly, I wish I had just stopped - I spent most of my time making sure everyone was OK (including my mum who found it all quite overwhelming that her little girl was married and had a 'moment'!), that I didn't enjoy it as much as I should have.

Having said all this, it's nothing in the grander scale of things. We had a day that reflected who we are...if only it were a longer day!!!

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Because I think I did it because I thought I 'should' do but actually it conflicts with how I see myself now.

Mini - I understand that. I always knew I would change my name when I got married... and for the most part, I'm pleased I have. I still get that niggling feeling, though, when I say my new name that it sounds wrong and that I'm not part of my clan any more.

Aaaaanyway, regrets. I have none from the day itself - apart from the usual thinking about certain photos I wish I'd asked to be taken. Completely my fault, although these are photos I hadn't even considered I would miss, so I wouldn't have been able to get them right beforehand anyway, IYKWIM?

My one major regret which I'd figured would be the case - I think I even mentioned it on this thread when I bumped it a few months back, is that I didn't savour the run up to the big day. I was a very chilled out bride to be and never really got stressed... or even that excited. I was just caught in the flow and I wish I'd stopped in the days leading up to it and just took stock of what was happening.

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Which particular shots do you mean pooba? Lots of brides seem to be regretting not having specific shots. Just wondered what they are so I can make sure I remember to mention them to my photographer. x

I had a reasonably short list of shots I definitely wanted: us with his immediate family, us with mine, us with both, us with his extended family, us with my extended family, us with friends, us with siblings + best man, and that was about it.

It's things like, I don't have a professional picture with just me and my brother - lots of group shots, but none just the two of us. Me with my cousins. Me with my school friends. Us with just the best man (our best friend) - again, lots of group shots but none of the three of us.

I didn't even think about them when giving the TOG our list... or I subconsciously figured we'd get the shots at some point in the day. I also hate having my photo taken when it's very posed so wanted the list to be really short. That said, I was actually in the zone on the day, so probably could have coped with having more posed professional pictures taken.

All that in mind, our photographer was brilliant and I really can't complain too much about the photos - he did an amazing job!

Hope that helps!

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Totally agree with everything you said! I wanted to keep the list short to avoid the multitude of boring posed pics. But now I kind of wish I had one with just me and my mum or just me and my best friends individually etc. Like you said I just sort of assumed these would be done at some point during the day but it's such a whirlwind it goes past before you've even thought of it.

- Running into guests after asking politely via my mum, that as there are several nice hotels in the area that no one stayed where we were for a bit of privacy, 10pm ended up drinking with a family friend....we kinda had other plans.

- Not running through the timings day before, it was all a bit of a cluster-f, towards the end as within the space of 5 months we ended up dealing with 4 different people, one we met the day before! As such we didn't get to serve the cake, so that was a waste of money but my mum made one and she did a wonderful job and decorated it perfectly and as the cutting of the cake got forgotten, no one had any, so she wasted time, effort and time.

- Not double checking the canapes, they were apparently lovely, but I am a picky eater and only liked one of them, that's the one that was replaced so had to decline them.

- Not talking to the venue a few days later. When we came to clear up the room the next day it was already done for us, but the card box has been damaged and was open, we were potentially missing a few cards as I don't think people wouldn't turn up without a card, but we can't ask "did you give us a card as we think it got lost" incase they didn't and then feel bad - OH thinks I'm nuts but I sadly wanted to keep all the cards in a little box as a keepsake.

- We had the FA cup on, and I hardly got to watch any of it, saw our disallowed goal, and man u collecting their medals. Should have mingled better where we had the tv hehe.

- Not taking a video of how my dress bustled up, there is a great picture of me and my chief bridesmaid looking up my dress before I put it on, trying to explain how to bustle it - neither of us worked it out properly so she kept having to re tie every time I went to the loo.

All pretty tame in the grand scheme of things.

We had photos for almost 2 hours after the ceremony (yawn) but I still didn't get a proper photo of the back of my dress or our rings.

It's sadly impossible to get every photo you want.

I guess those two photos are my regret... I can't help but see the photos we didn't get.

Also, looking back now not involving 2 of OHs oldest friends in the wedding. At the time, I didn't want the bridal party numbers to get out of control (factoring in kilt hire, gifts etc) but now think perhaps we should have done it anyway.

The only one I can think of is not taking off my veil. There was a lot of detail on the back of my dress and I had originally planned to take it off after the ceremony. I briefly thought about it during the meal and decided to take it off afterwards but then I completely forgot.

I honestly can't think of anything else. That's probably due to spending 18 months on Hitched picking up tips from threads like this!

Great idea for a thread. Hoping more OM's will join in

We are currently toying with hiring a videographer, so it's interesting to read that it's something a couple of you regret not doing.

I feel very lucky, in that I don't have any heart wrenching regrets and just a few niggly little things.

- I would have insisted I set up the music from my Spotify the evening before while I was dressing the room, instead of the morning of the wedding, between having my breakfast and getting my hair and make-up done. It would have saved me a lot of stress and probably helped me enjoy the morning a little more.

- I would have maybe had another look around for a hair and MUA. Although I like the results of mine on the day (the trial was pretty pants tbh...) I don't really think I liked the lady who did it. She was early and quite pushy/rushy, which didn't help with the stress (see point number one).

- I would have had some of our wedding cake! I wasn't hungry at all, so barely ate anything all day. I had some of our cake the day after and it was grogeous - just wish I had tried the other tiers too!

- I would have not eaten as much junk in the two months leading up to the wedding, which caused me stress about fitting into my dress~!

- I feel like I didn't have much time with my dad. He's an observant type, so it happy to just sit at the side and watch everyone quietly, but I was so busy dancing and talking to everyone, I probably didn't have as much time as I should have with him.

Bump!

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Some times depending on the background then taking people out of a photo and putting them in can be done ? Would you like me to have a go?

I hate seeing these posts where couples didn't get the photos they thought they were getting.

I wish I had got more photos of me showing my dress off, particularly from the back. I can't complain though, our photos are stunning!

I also wished I ate more food!! I was too excited to eat many canapés, I tasted a bit of each course and was too busy dancing to eat a pulled pork roll! Everyone was raving about our food for weeks after, wish I tasted it all!

Not really too bad as far as regrets go aye! it was the best day ever!x

Hi all

I have noticed lots of posts about flip-flop baskets - I am getting married next year and wasn't keen on the flip-flop idea because if the ladies are wearing tights, they'd have to take them off. So I got 40 pairs of slippers from Ebay for £26.00 They are the kind of slippers that are free in hotels and spas - they only have to last a couple of hours.

So the slippers can work out cheaper than flip-flops! There's loads on Amazon & Ebay!

Bruce Neville Photography - I would directly quote you, but despite being on here for a while I have never learnt how to. Embarrassing ?

Thank you so much for your offer of looking into our photos - really do appreciate it. I think we're okay (plus I've created all the photo albums for the parents for Christmas!) but will certainly bear it in mind if the missing photos play on my mind in the future.

Thanks again!

Bumping this thread because it's awesome!

I'll come back in a couple of weeks and add to it if I have any regrets on Saturday ?

Just re-read this whole excellent thread! Fingers crossed no regrets... 2 months to go! Thanks for all the advice, ladies!! X

Theres so many great points here! Thanks!

This thread was started in 2013 but over two days I’ve read it page by page. So many helpful tips! We have 6 months (all COVID restrictions allowing) until our day & even though we booked nearly two years ago, I’ve only started putting ANY plans in place this week ?
Thanks to this thread my notes include a photographer list, to continue to be as chilled as possible, not to worry my simplistic table ideas aren’t enough & a reminder to buy a flip flops/slippers basket!