Open bar, yay or nay?

I would only provide an open bar if all your guests are moderate drinkers. For financial reasons, but also for the comfort of those of your guests who don't like to get blind drunk. I've been to a couple of weddings that had the combination of open bar + a lot of heavy drinkers and it was not fun. (One of those weddings reached the point where those of us who were single females actually felt unsafe and were having to go to the loo in groups for our protection )

Most of the weddings I've been to, the only drinks that have been free have been the bottles that were on the tables during the meal and the toasts or welcoming drinks. So I think it's fine to just do that. In my view, providing drink tickets giving people the first two or three drinks for free is more than generous.

Hi
We were trying to decide on a free bar or tokens for our guest.
In the end we decided to subside the bar and to stipulate singles only if guests want spirits.

I wouldn't do it unless you have deep pockets and can accept the cost will likely be in the thousands. We are providing reception cocktail, toasting fizz and half bottle of wine for the meal and after that is cash bar. I honestly don't thing people have an issue paying for drinks at a wedding as it is their choice. For people to pressure you to keep an open bar is frankly cheeky as hell considering how much you pay for a wedding as it is.

If you can afford it, yes, if you can't afford it, no. Don't feel pressured! If your family want you to have one, ask them to pitch in. It can be so expensive!

No one ever expects an open bar at a wedding, but it's always a lovely treat. My Fiancé and I have said that if by our final planning meeting we can afford to put money behind the bar then we absolutely will but otherwise we'll do without. A vouchers option is a good idea, or an extra round of bubbly/beers for toasts.

My Fiancé loves to bet on the football and horses so he decided from the moment we got engaged that any winnings will go behind the bar, we also paid upfront (within the package for our venue) for all of the rooms and then request the price back from family & bridal party who are staying - we've decided that this money will either go behind the bar or towards our honeymoon.

I also asked our venue what corkage would be if we brought in our own beers, still expensive but not as bad as putting a few grand behind the bar.

Just do what's right for you If your close friends & fam are big drinkers then then can definitely put their hands in their pockets! x

Could an alternative to the tokens be putting an amount behind the bar, and once that limit is reached it becomes a cash bar? This is what we’re doing, even though I would say only about 1/3 of the guests would expect an open bar (different traditions/cultures). You could place extra restrictions on this, like it only applies to regular measures of beer and wine, and excludes spirits, bottles etc. But if you choose to go cash only I would say that’s not unusual, many weddings the only “free” drinks the guests get are reception drinks and wine with dinner, so if that’s what you would prefer don’t be afraid to go with that

Yes, I think the only time a free bar works is if you have a majority of guests who either don't drink or only have one. We were offering a free bar for our reception, but we were having a maximum of 27 adults, 6 of whom don't drink at all and the rest are the kind who have one drink when they go out and then stop.

We are taking the risk and having an open bar.
However we have asked the venue to let us know if the tab gets to a certain amount so we can "switch it off" if we need to. We also haven't told anyone it's open.
The way we budgeted for it was by looking at the drinks prices and estimating an average price per drink (we went for the cost of a gin and tonic) then multiplying it by the number of guests and again by one drink per hour in the evening which should be much more than we need. On the basis that day guests will have already had welcome cocktails, wine with their meal and champagne for the toasts we are betting on most people only wanting one or two in the evening. When is your wedding? Ours is in six weeks so I'd be happy to send you a DM and let you know whether people took the p***.

We are paying for the drinks for the wedding breakfast which will be unlimited table wine for adults and unlimited coke for kids. Anything else they can pay for. We are not drinkers so do not see the point and our families are also massive drinkers so they can drink as much wine as they want with dinner and the venue has said anything that’s open before the cake gets put behind the bar for people to drink for free until it’s gone. The amount we would have to put behind the bar would be thousands which we are not willing to do. Every wedding I have been to for my family and friends has always been a cash bar and as long as the prices aren’t stupidly over priced no one complains. At the end of the day we are paying for your food ALL day, paying for a few pints won’t harm anyone.

We’re providing fizz for toasts and wine/beer for the table during the meal. Open bar? Not a chance!! The stingy guests who don’t want to open their wallet - don’t have to! They can drive themselves home at the end of the night

I would say hell no! If they can out drink Barney then I would rather have them buy there own drinks.


If your relatives are pressuring then ask them to pay for the open bar and see what response you get. If they are willing to put down a certain amount down, in advance towards it, then by all means.

Have no idea who Barney is but we are not having a free bar. I think I’ve only been to two weddings where this happened and I’m the last one to get married so I’ve been to a lot of weddings! I don’t think people expect it, it will run into thousands (particularly for us as we are in Surrey so it’s expensive) and people can abuse it. We have a package with unlimited welcome drinks, half a bottle of wine per person with dinner and champagne for the toast. That is enough!

I've been erring about this too. We've decided to go with a set number of cocktails/person (aside from wine on the table+champagne at the beginning) and that's it, you can't buy anything else. I know a few people can drink a bit too much, but they're mostly happy drunks, so I'm hoping, as you said, that they remember that they're at a wedding.


Generally I'd say don't let them pressure you into anything, it's your choice and you're paying for it. Of course they'd say that if they like drinking

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I did go to one wedding that did that - the only problem was that the serious drinkers hit the bar straight away, ordering multiple drinks and using up the entire amount, so it ended up with them having loads of free drinks and a lot of other people not getting any!

We had an open bar until we sat down for food and a cash bar after. What they say about us Scottish enjoying a drink is true and our 70 guests drank £3000 worth of alcohol in two hours. Also in true Scottish form nobody was drunk before the meal as our family and friends are all hardened drinkers.


Only offer an open bar if you can afford it and know your guests won’t take advantage as an open bar is a bonus and not something most guests expect.

View quoted message That’s a good point - it really does depend on your guests, so if you know some people would be like that then perhaps tokens are the fairest option.
My family are Irish so we’re making sure to put several thousand behind the bar 😅 but also open bars aren’t a tradition in Ireland, so if we reach the limit and it turns into a cash bar no one will be put out

You have invited people to your wedding and are paying a lot for them to have a very nice day regardless of what happens at the bar! If they think you are stingey, they shouldn't be there in the first place. The best people at your wedding will be the people who are delighted to be there and will be willing to pay for their own drinks! Don't be pressured by people who are more interested in themselves than you! Good luck xx

Not sure if this is an option for you, but we're providing drinks at certain points during the day and then moving onto a cash bar later.

So, on us are:

- Pimms and processo with the canapes, which we're having as 2hr cocktail hour to make the most of our outdoor venue. I'm not sure of the exact amounts off the top of my head here but there's definitely enough for a few drinks each going round here.

- Half a bottle of wine per person on the table for the meal. We love rose, as do most of our guests, and it's a summer wedding, so we're stocking the tables just with rose as I've seen far too many summer events where the rose goes fast and loads of red is left over which feels like a waste of money to me. If anyone desperately wants anything else the bar is right there (and will be serving the entire day if someone does want to buy themselves more/something different at any point).

- Champagne for toasting during the speeches.

To be paid for by the guests:

- Any extra drinks wanted during the disco portion of the evening.

Basically, our logic is that between about 2pm and 7/8pm we'll be supplying a fairly decent amount of alcohol for free, and every moment you'd expect to have a drink in hand we're providing it, but as soon as the DJ starts that's kinda the window where it's completely personal choice how much you want to drink - meaning some guests may go out of control and just want to get plastered which I have a hard time justifying paying for on top of everything else!

If we can swing it nearer the time, we may put some money aside and order a few more bottles of wine to keep the free stuff going a bit longer, but we probably wouldn't put money behind the bar. I think there's often someone that exploits it by ordering doubles of expensive liquors or something and getting through them at a pace... and I also think that when the money runs out it puts people in a bit of a mood whereas if going up to the bar and ordering something yourself is paid for from the start then people don't have that moment of "oh, I can't drink for free anymore so maybe I'll leave"

I would say not to have an open bar if you have some guests that are very heavy drinkers!


We are possibly doing drinks vouchers, but only for evening guests as they were not there the whole day so they can have the first drink or two on us. The day guests will have had enough free drinks throughout the day

The majority of weddings we have been to have had a cash bar which we are doing as well as drinks on tables

You have already spent a small fortune on the catering, venue, entertainment and a million other things. I don't think that anyone would object to a cash bar. I am in my mid fifties, and I have been to hundreds of weddings all around the UK, for couples on all sorts of incomes. Not once have I come across an open bar, and I would never expect it.

For our own wedding in September, we are providing Prosecco and soft drinks for a drinks and canapes reception during photos following the Ceremony, and a modest drinks package at our reception venue of a glass of Prosecco or bottle of beer on arrival, half a bottle of wine per person for the meal and a glass of Prosecco for the toasts. Just the package was £20 per person. That for us, is enough. If our guests want more to drink, then they can pay for that themselves! I think that is fair.

Don't give yourself any more worry - your guests can pay for their own drinks!

The only sensible way is to have none of your guests paying for their drinks as if you ask them to you can also save the money on the venue for the evening and go to the next night club. So if there is no free bar just hire a coach and drive everyone to a night club after the food that is the most cost effective way.

I don't think so. It could get expensive very fast. I've been to alot of weddings and never been to one with an open bar
Maybe because it's just not really done where I'm from. I wouldn't expect an open bar either. Weddings are expensive enough and people can spend what they can afford at the bar.
We will be having a drink reception with prosecco between the ceremony and the meal There will be wine with the meal. These are included in our package at the hotel. There will be an open bar where guests can order what the like.