Opinions..... How much money to give as a gift at a wedding?

The last few weddings we've been too have been really close family and friends and they knew we haven't a lot of spare cash at the moment so we gave £30 to each of them. Seemed OK and seemed an average after asking everyone else too. Some gave more others less. We are also going to a wedding in August and will give them £30 too. x

Last wedding I went to we gave 50 quid. I thought it was too much, we barely knew them. Plus there was no food so I got overly drunk and a little obnoxious which H2B says was 50 quid well spent

I'd only give more to close family, and of course if I wasn't broke at the time.

If they request money, they are very unlikely to receive money... ?

If, without prompting, I wish to give a gift and choose to give money, it depends on what my general feeling is regarding the standard amounts within the friendship group. I'd say maybe £50.

I would give close friends and family a lot more.

However, this really is the last resort for me - I hate giving money.

My dinner cost per couple was close to £300 - would you have given that back?

This, and it also depends on whether I'm a day or evening guest and if I'm by myself or with OH.

I think between £30 and £50 is sufficient depending on whether it's friends, closer friends or family and depending on how flush you are feeling!

I wouldn't I would give a gift.

I think it's wrong to ask for something. If I got asked "what would you like for your wedding?" I would ask for there company.

I started off like that, but some people are really concerned and upset if there isn't a list for them to be able to get you something they know you will use and/or treasure. I relented 2/3 weeks ago and chucked a list together. I've had 3 requests for it today (wedding is Sat, lol)

i think my nan will be like that.. She's a list person. Has loads of them in her flat!

OH's mum was like that, plus his old aunts who couldn't make the distance. It's tradition! Plus, if we didn't do a list people were going to give us money, I definitely. definitely didn't want any cash.

I would spend the cash on a boring water bill or something!! Lol

I put maybe 20-30 in a card and then a little something as a gift to keep for close friends/family maybe spending £50 but £30 I usually give, I would love to give more but I cant afford to ?

No, and that's another thought which crossed my mind.

I think the most I've given is £150 and that was to a very close friend (my MOH). But another friend of mine gave her £300 and the bride actually told me it made her feel uncomfortable as she would never be able to give the girl that kind of money back at her wedding.

I guess it also depends how popular you are, ie how many weddings you've been invited to that year/no. of weddings coming up, with regard to budget.

My amount is now between 75-100, particularly after having my own and realising how ridiculously expensive weddings are.....

£50 for friends, £100 for family, and close friends.

Is it that bad to ask for money instead of gifts?

We will have been together ten years when we get married, we've got four children and a house with no storage! I don't need bedding, towels or dinner sets. A bit of money towards the honeymoon/family holiday would be better for us.

in answer to the original question, we would probably give £30-50, depending on how close we are to the couple.

I think that may happen to me, i told my FSIL there was no gift list. she said her OH's cousin did that and the family freaked out because they didnt know what to get!!

In my case i have everything i need for the house, i dont need a kettle or a toaster, also personally i wouldn't be 'thrilled' gifting someone a toaster. I bought my FSIL 4 spoons and someone else got her 4 forks etc, that always weirded me out, but its want she wanted. money to me is fine, i can see why some people don't like it, because it seems like a lack of thought has gone into it or that your friendship now has a monetary value. The 'gift list' has become a minefield of damned if you do, damned if you don't. If i gave money, it'd be around £30 to £50, or better yet if they're close I'd listen to them talk and the 'after the wedding' wishlist they talk about (we all do it, i've been doing it for months now) and get something off that.

Thou if push came to shove and people reaaaaaaaally wanted a gift list, we'd would like a Ipad, a smart TV, the PS4, a wii U, a sofa with an ipod dock ... ;P

I have to second this lol. I prefer getting gifts especially personalised ones etc and like looking for extra special ones. If they didn't ask for money and I was giving that i'd give £20 - £30 unless they were close friends then i'd probably give £50 - £100 DEPENDING on how well I knew them / we get on

I've usually given £50 in the past. I have no objection to giving money instead of a gift if that's what the couple want, though I do really hate money poems. If I know them very well, and can think of something they actually want/need then I might get that, but I don't want to buy something that won't be appreciated.

I would go with a crisp £50 note...looks pretty aswell But tough call huh, if tables were turned how much would they give you?

I feel like this is something that differs very widely between Canada and the UK. Back home I've never given a wedding gift or money that was less than what the meal was likely to have cost, which meant that when I went to my brother's wedding I bought $200 worth of stuff off his registry. And that was on top of the cost of flying round trip Osaka to Toronto and hotel! My job at the time was not very good, either, so it's not like I was rolling in money. For my close friend Tabby's wedding last year, though, Ant and I together probably cost about $150, so that's what we gave.

For our wedding, though, you could see a great split. My side tended to give huge gifts, Ant's side less so, except for his parents and aunt and uncle. Is not a bad thing, just a cultural difference I guess, and just one of the many that sprang up when wedding planning!

The last wedding I went to they set up a Debenhams gift voucher list. We gave them £40 into the voucher fund and spent £10 on little token gifts so they got something to open.

For an evening do usually about £20-30.

Same for me. The modal gift value from the Englishers was £50 per couple. The modal gift value from the Irishers was £200 per couple.

Family and close friends up to £100, Good Friends £50, Mates £20 - £30, work collegues maybe a voucher or a small gift like a 'Mr and Mrs' plaque or something.

We got a few gifts for the wedding, some lovely champagne flutes, little personalised things, a lovely silver photo frame - we loved all our gifts. We mainly got money though - both pounds and dollars for honeymoon which went towards meals out, going to see shows in Vegas etc - so really, our guests bought us the experience and memories. Thats how we saw it.

I'm not fussed if people have a gift list or a request for money, I dont love the poems you get, but thats only because they're usually naff. I dont see it as rude. We had tons of people ask if we had a gift list before the invitations even went out so I think the majority of people would like that guidance.

Depends on who they are. If I know them well then about £50. If I know where they are going on honeymoon then I get in in that currency i.e. My sister is off to the USA so we are giving her dollars.

If it is an evening only do then I usually do £30 or buy a gift.

Normally about £50 or £60.

I have no problem getting people whatever they've asked for be it gifts or money. If they haven't asked for anything I would normally get a small gift and money.

Evening I tend to buy a gift or give about £25-£30.

Without commenting on the whole gift vs money side of things, as the OP specifically asked how much, I'd do pretty much the same as Rod said.

It's also good being a guest when you're already married as you can see what they gave you!

Evening invite 20 quid

Day invite depends on who it is but probably 50 I think.

Close friends and family probably more though

Not even a card? Wow.

Around £80 from me and OH for day guest invites.

Depending on how close I'd probably give the same if it was just me invited.

Evening around £30 from both of us.

I know what you mean. You condone it but it is still a little odd!

If they request money quite often I won't give them money becaseu I'm contrary like that, especially if they use a poem.

For those who don't ask: friends and colleagues: £50 per day guest, so £100 if just OH and I are invited, up to hundreds if the whole brood are. Halve this for evening only. For family I'd double it or more.

We were the same - my BIL who was our BM didnt even get us a card...How bad is that, not even a token bottle of cheap booze! Turns out he doesnt like me.....