Opinions needed on who gets corsages!!

We have got corsages for our Mums and that is it.

Like you say, I want it obvious who is part of the wedding.

Some people will wear corsages to every wedding they attend - it's a fairly traditional thing. Obviously, if you don't have a way of coordinating with the bridal flowers, you will pick according to your preferences/outfit. If his Mum wants to go with corsages (and you may find if this is a "done" thing at their family weddings, they'll do it anyway), can you suggest a design that coordinates with you but differentiates them from the bridal party? Or suggest that they get their own made up to match what they are wearing?

So you could say "Well, we are only have corsages made with bridal flowers for the Mums but you're welcome to wear one that you have made for your outfit".

Normally only the bridal party would wear corsages which match the colour scheme etc. However, many older people will still wear a buttonhole/corsage of their own choice to go with their outfits - it doesn't mean they're "in the wedding." I would say that if your FMiL wants flowers for her siblings, that's fine, but she'll have to pay for them as they're not part of the bridal party.

I'm really sorry to hear about your Aunties, hope you are all doing okay.

we also had corsage debates, and pretty much all of our day guests are now wearing one. My mum and MIL kept blooming asking people if they wanted one and that our florist will sort them out. Thankfully the people asking for them were wanting to pay for their own but it meant so much stress for us as people kept requesting certain styles and colours some wanted wrist ones others wanted bag ones and I just felt like screaming!

My MIL said its very common for ladies to wear corsages to weddings, I think we just don't see it as much with the younger generation. You could always ask the florist to avoid using the wedding colours so that it is obvious the corsage matches their outfits and it doesn't look like they are trying to be part of the wedding party?

Thanks ladies. I think I'll get him to tell her that they can have them if they match their outfits, rather than the bridal flowers. That makes more sense.

Phew! Thank you so much!! xxxxx

We had them for my mam and MIL. A few others asked and I, or my mam, just said that we weren't providing them for the guests and that most people wouldn't be wearing one. However, if they wanted to get one for themselves they're welcome to. No one did.

Thanks Mrs*M that's really kind of you to say. It's sad that they both got ill at the same time, they live together (very traditional Irish Catholics, never married, so stay in the family home) and are each other's main support so that they are both so sick is really sad and I know my mum worries about how they're doing.

I'm mostly worried about how my mum takes the corsage thing as she might be a bit sensitive about it, so I might just ask her if she wants me to get corsages for her sisters who can make it, just to make sure she doesn't feel slighted by it.

I just had to google it to see exactly what a wedding corsage even is!! So no, as you can tell we haven't got any haha. MIL wasnt wearing one at fututre bils wedding... and there is little tradition at our wedding anyway. Still havent had the guts to tell me grandma it isnt in a church!

Floral rules (although it's entirely up to choice!) dictate that only the principle lady guests should wear corsages i.e., MOB, MOG. Grandparents are sometimes included but as a rule of thumb, the MOB and MOB only wear corsages so they stand out from the rest of the guests and are immediately noticeable as being the MOB, MOG to photographer and those guests who haven't met them.

A lot of people get mixed up between buttonholes and corsages. Corsages are more elaborate than a buttonhole, larger, more feminine and only worn by women. Buttonholes are simpler and worn by both men and women. Corsages would normally be designed to match/compliment the Mums' outfits rather than the bridal colours so as to avoid any colour clashes and also to make sure that the flowers add the finishing touch to their overall look.

A lot of people buy their own buttonholes to attend a wedding as they don't expect to be provided with one. This used to be done years ago but is rarely done these days. Again, this is purely down to personal choice and budget as to whether you provide them or not. If they are provided, they are best done in neutral colours rather than a specific colour of the bridal party to avoid clashes with outfits as mentioned.

Costwise, corsages are more expensive than buttonholes because they are a different design to a buttonhole and invoive lots of intricate wiring work so take longer to make.

In answer as to what to do, I would ask your Mum to make sure that people only buy buttonholes (and NOT corsages!) at their expense if they want one as you want her and OH MUm to look more special than the other guests.

If you want to see examples of buttonholes and corsages, there are lots on my website. Hope that helps.

I only had corsages for my mum and his mum.. I turn up to church to find the rest of my family wearing a tacky pink carnation.. my mum had gone behind my back to a different florist and had ordered them for my side, they were awful - so if she wants them done I would just say let her do it and get them in the flowers you like.. my boss also had a corsage done, I think some people just wear them to weddings- but she had a lovely orchid one done..

I can seriously sympathise with this! I had World War III with my mum over corsages! Wen we met with the florist she insisted on buying corsages for SILs on both sides plus my grandma. I didn't mind my grandma but I objected to the SILs as there are 4 of them and they are not part of the wedding party. My mums argument was that she would pay but to me that wasn't the point. I just feel that constantly she has pushed for my SILs to be part of the wedding party and I don't want them to be. She then went ahead and rang the florist later and added them on. I was furious but unfortunately it was too late when I realised to cancel them.

I am sure my mum and your MIL2B mean nothing by it and just want everyone to be involved but i know its so frustrating when it's not what you want. I dread the last week as mum is helping me do stuff and I know it's going to be hard not to murder her in the meantime!!!