parents dont approve of wedding abroad!!

I think if you just want a small wedding, then you're perfectly within your rights to go abroad. My sister's 2nd wedding was abroad but she only had a very few close family members. However, she then had a big party when she got back for everyone - hired a hall, buffet food, etc.

Is that something you could do - explain that you want the actual wedding really small but a bigger celebration with friends?

We are getting married abroad and because of this three of my four children cant make it, for various reasons. Nor can alot of close family. This hasn't gone down well with some people but it's what we chose to do at the end of the day. We are having a reception party when we get back and that has helped to rectify a few problems.

I would say to you, have what you want, I'm sure your parents wont want to miss your special day. If they were going to go to Jamaca surely they will go to Cyprus!

a reception when we get back was on the list of it all, and were going to get our wedding day recorded..its just trying to please the people that are close to you!

thanks for your replies!

what ever happened to the bride wanting the day that SHE wants?? what a pickle.

If you want to get married abroad then do it. Don't worry about what others think. I would only get married abroad though if you are not going to be disappointed about some people not being there. My Sister is getting married abroad in a 5* hotel costing stupid amounts of money and got upset that i couldn't go. I'm happy for her that she wants to do that but find it odd that she thought everyone would go. Where she thinks I can get 3k from in 6 months I do not know. As this is just about you then go for it.

Speaking from a Mum's point of view, our daughter and her boyfriend toyed with the idea of a wedding abroad and we weren't over the moon about this either. Not because we didn't want them to have the wedding abroad but more or less the same reason as your Mum and Dad i.e., Grandma. She is very close to her Grandma, my Mum-in-Law, as she is and only ever will be the only grandchild as is her boyfriend on his side. Our other point was that in addition to paying for the wedding and reception when they got back home, we would also have to fork out for two weeks in the Carribean for a holiday on top of this which wasn't really part of the plan! Andrew's Grandma was gutted because she has alzheimers and can't travel, Alex's Grandma although put on a brave face when it was mentioned, I could see her heart was broken as she's looked forward to my daughter's wedding ever since she was born. She is also elderly, 77, and can't travel abroad anymore. Anyway, to cut a long story short, they changed their minds and are now glad that they are marrying in this country and having all their family and friends there to share it with them. I probably am going to get shot down in flames for saying this but so many times I hear from Brides "It's OUR day and we want to do what we want" Please also bear in mind that is also Mums and Dads day too! We have been looking forward to this day since the day you were born so try not to be too hard on us

Stick to your guns honey, your wedding your way.

If you back down to please your parents where would it end? also you would be paying for people to attend your wedding that you dont necessarily want there (that opens up lots more stress!!)

Have a great day and a party in the uk afterwards should please them.

xx

I'm getting married abroad. We have all our close family and a few close friends going out with us. Everyone is happy with it. We chose to get married in Turkey so people could class it as a normal summer holiday (whereas the Caribbean is an expensive holiday).

We're having an after party when we get back in a hotel and we've got a buffet and a disco.

Rainbow Florist > i totally hear where you are coming from, but my parents aren't paying for my wedding, there for there say in it has slimmed right down to 10%, as harsh as this sounds, im now being told its about family traditions and family value and there sticking to there guns about not coming! so there choosing not to make it "there day too" i dont think im being nasty in saying this, being there only daughter and this is the man of my dreams,i dont think im being hard on them, they just need to make up there minds rather than making excuses? sorry im rather stressed out as this all kicked off again this eve) Thankyou x

everyone else> i know i know.. life is a bloody pickle! esp if its my family lol..

oh blimey were trying to do this cheap as possible just in a lovely warm sunny sand place, so people will be well informed and hopefully see it more as a holiday in cyprus than going to a wedding.

I think you need to take a wee bit of time to think about it all and who all you do want at your wedding. You need to think long and hard about who you might offend and in case you actually fall out with people. not speaking to any of your family might not constitute a happy marriage.

As I said before... I'm getting married abroad, but if my parents wouldn't come i'd be in the registry office and down the local pub.

I guess if you're paying for your wedding yourselves, then it does throw a different light on things. I certainly don't think you're being "nasty" - believe me, I don't get on with my Mum and never have so I know how stressful situations can get - even more so as they get older (she's 93) and they revert back to being childlike again! Maybe you could have a word with Grandma and see how she feels? Sometimes it's easy to get carried away with the occasion and all the trimmings that go with it that people and feelings tend to get sidelined somewhat. Only you will know how you will feel if your Mum/Grandma weren't there to share your day and whether there will be any regrets in years to come. Hope you can work things out x

What? ?

are you thinking the same as me...a spot of random advertising in a thread with nothnig to do with videos!??

Yup! How rude! Grrr

reading this kinda makes me think that it was a pretty tough time for you, esp being as close to your sisters as you was (by sounds of it) so it sounds like you did the right thing! how is she now?

i keep wondering what the hell to do, and the wedding day isnt going to be for ages yet (cant afford t as were paying for it ourselves) so its not like im talking next week. i spoose as time goes they will come round to MY dream wedding! again sounds selfish saying "my" in it, but then i spoose thats the way it is. cant please them all, and its a shame as it is the people that mean the most to me.

i havenbt had a chance to speak to my Nan as of yet, i called her the other day but my MUM answered the phone, i then got told by my dad "oh so you do care about family after all" so i know his already had the dagger out about me to my nan.

ahhhhh!!! just a bloody head ache, but it is nice to talk to people that understand, and im very greatfull for the advice/tips/sergestions etc