Planning my parents renewing of wedding vow (sens) (UPDATED)

Oh what a lovely thing to do for your parents. Bless you.

I didnt realise you could renew your vows with a Registrar, I thought it was only Church that did that, Ive learned something new today!

I have no recomendations as Ive never been to Cornwall, but I really do hope that they will agree to it as it does sounds like a beautiful thing to do. x

That's a lovely thing to do - I'm quite choked at it. I'm sure a local florist will be able. As for photographers, might be worth asking Crantock (on BT if not here) as she used to live there and might be able to recommend people.

I'm sorry to hear about your fathers illness.

Do they want to renew their vows or are you surprising them?

I think you have got it sorted planning wise, not sure I could think of anything else you need to do apart from maybe a small cake?

If they dont want to renew their vows why not dress up and have a lovely meal somewhere maybe hiring a photographer to take pictures of you all anyway?

(I only say this as I dont believe in renewing vows as you say till death us do part anyway and they might be a bit sensitive to it, my husband died 4 years ago so I do understand)

I hope what ever you plan you all have a lovely and very special time

Em

EJJ, Sorry to hear about your husband

I don’t know if a surprise ceremony would be a good idea, as my mum had a stroke years ago and never fully recovered, so it would take her ages to get ready, would need to give her a month notice just to get her shoes on ?

Hazel,

Thanks for giving me Crantock’s name I will try and send her a message.

What a lovely idea I can see how this will be so special to your mum and dad. I'm a wedding & event planner and always suggest to my clients that they ask their venue (in your case, the restaurant where you're having dinner) to recommend their local suppliers (florist etc). If you find a local florist, you should be able to talk through your requirements on the phone and sort things out that way rather than doing it via Interflora.

I guess if you post on planning you will get rec's for photographers in the area.

Do you have a camcorder you could take? Might be nice to get some video footage. What a lovely surprise for them both, sorry to hear about your dad.xx

Sorry to hear about your Dad - it sounds like a lovely idea if you can.

I think you'd be better off contacting a local florist to do the flowers though - this is normally how I send flowers to friends. I'm in Cornwall but near Truro so can't offer any recommendations at the moment (my brother did our wedding photography) but shout out for Titchbunny as well as she lives a bit closer to Bude than I do. If there is anything else you can think of, give me a shout, I might be able to help.

I am really sorry to hear about your Dad, what you are doing will give you all some wonderful memories. What a lovely and thoughtful daughter you are.

Just picking up on what EJJ said, when I said my vows to my husband, they were for life and i will never say them again (it is just my personal view) but I would not be adverse to a blessing, especially if I were in your parents position. The beauty of a blessing is that it can be performed any where as it is not legal, a garden, over looking a favourite spot or even on the beach or your favourite restaurant. If you wanted a minister to perform the blessing, a lot don't charge, many just ask for a donation, and I am sure they will be delighted to perform the blessing for your parents. If they are not religious then I think a humanist celebrant can do something unique and personal to your mum and dad. Those are just my thoughts on things, please free free to ignore.

Back to your other questions, we got married away from home and found most of our suppliers via the internet and from recommendations from other brides over on planning.

I hope it all goes well for you.

Thanks for all the replies, I am going to sort out some bits tonight, speak to my brothers and see what they think, just in case they have a holiday booked. I think my parents will love the idea, but will have a look into doing something a bit different as people mentioned the death do us part bit, I didn’t even think about that. Might be great for them to write something of their own.

My SIL got married in Bude and used www.jaynesherephotography.co.uk - the photos were stunning (had some lovely ones taken down by the breakwater). I'm pretty sure they got the flowers from Brooks Garden Centre www.brooksgardencentre.co.uk

Hope it all goes well for you. If you want any more recs, let me know and I can find out who else they used for other stuff - my inlaws live in Bude so may have more ideas.

HTH

Misty thanks alot.

I had a look at the photographer earlier and thought the photos looked good so glad you said about her.

I have spoken to my brother and he is well up for it. He is already down there the week beginning the 19th for 2 weeks so at least we have got some ideas of when to go.

Just will need to talk my parents into it, even if it means I pay for everything!

Well I have been to my parents tonight and told them what I had said on here and they arent sure! They are not sure if they have got the money to go on holiday down there, so this puts me in a bad place. We cant afford to pay for them to go away, but they have said that they will think about it, so that should hopefully be a good sign. Lets just hope over the next few days they decide that it's agreat idea!

Thanks for all the messages!

Sorry about your dad. ? If its at a registry office it wont be a religious ceremony so they wont say the till Death us do part bit so it shouldnt be a worry,

Updated in OP

Why not just have a party without the vows?

The problem with my mum is when she has made her mind up on anything, thats it she just wont have it, no matter what anyone says. I said just a party, but again wont have it, she is really a subborn moo!

? Am really sorry to hear that you're Mum is not feeling up to the renewal as it really sounded like a lovely gesture. maybe it's just to difficult for her to face with everything that is going on with your Dad's illness.

I too have a very stubborn mum who has suffered from a stroke and sometimes there is no reasoning or getting her to understand, so I do feel for you.

Could you perhaps not just get some nice pictures of your family instead and have a family gathering with a photographer to take some formal and informal shots, so she doesn't feel like she's being put on the spot? ?

Hugs

Just what I was going to suggest. If all you want is some nice pictures, you can have some done without needing a big event as an excuse.

You know, I think you just have to respect your parents' wishes here; it's their marriage and their vows - after all, it's not like their old ones have run out. I'm guessing here, but perhaps she feels really uncomfortable being the centre of attention - maybe something more low key, just close family, a nice meal, and some informal photos as suggested by pigalicious would be more acceptable?

I do feel for you - it was a nice idea and I know I'd love some photos of my parents together (or some half decent ones of my Mom to be honest). You must feel very disappointed?

I am in North Cornwall, about 20 mins from Bude, I would be more than happy to make you a celebration cake (I make cakes as a hobby) and I can give you lots of advise regarding photographers etc. If you decide to do anything shout, I think it's a wonderful thing to do, Jo x

It sounded like a lovely idea, but it really sounds like your Mum doesn't want to do it so I guess you have to go along with that.

Maybe you could have a family photography session by itself?

TG