PLEASE HELP!!

Is your aisle wide enough to have both your mother and the stepfather to walk you, one either side? Perhaps this could be a nice compromise

Could you give your mum something else to do - like a reading or a speech, so she feels involved?

My mum has chopped and changed on a couple of things - I think sometimes, they change their minds or other people's expectations make them feel they 'ought' to be doing something.

My father died a few years ago, so I discussed who would walk me down the aisle with my mum, and she agreed that with her uncertain health, it wouldn't be a good idea for her to do it and suggested one of my uncles (who I'd already thought would be a good person to ask). So I asked him, and then later, a few people told her that she should be the one to do it and it was terrible that I'd asked my uncle instead, so then she started saying it ought to be her instead!!!

I suppose your mum would have been so surprised by the suggestion that she felt she had to agree to it. I can understand why she initially said it would be OK but is still very upset. Her reaction is natural and predictable.