Private Vows

Hi Chloe, remember that you do not have to have your own vows - its just something that registrars let you do and I have shot many weddings where they simply stick to the standard vows, the personal vows are an added extra if you want them so dont feel pressured if you are not comfortable.

You could do it the way that you thought but I do not know of a time that it would fit nicely. How about both writing it in a card to each other that you can both read to yourselves in the morning when you are both getting ready.

My personal preference is for standard vows at the ceremony and any private vows to be a private moment between the couple. It always feels a bit voyeuristic listening to something so personal between the couple! I like the idea of either having a private 'vow moment' before or after the legal bit, or of exchanging cards or letters to read as you get ready on the wedding day.

This conversation has been helpful for me too; thank you all.

My thoughts about finding an opportune moment was not so much about the time it may take but perhaps they would not feel quite the same when done half way through the drinks ceremony, this also is actually a very busy time as everyone wants you and it the main section for any photos.

How about when you walk down the isle together you usually go straight outside depending on the venue and weather, mostly the two of you leave first and the guests follow.

But instead of the two of you leading out first you could "do a left" and the guests ushered right, you could go to a separate room and read your vows to each other whilst the guests are arranged outside ready with confetti as you walk out the door after you have read your vows privately to each other. That way you are still "in the moment" and the guests will be none the wiser and you will still have a good flow for your wedding.

Photography wise I would perhaps get a few shots as you prepare and then leave you to be private whilst I then make sure the confetti is lined up correctly for a good shot.

The idea of doing standard vows during the ceremony and then private vows afterward is actually pretty awesome! It gives you a chance to express yourselves freely without any awkwardness or pressure. It's a personal touch that some couples opt for, and it can make the moment even more intimate and special. So if that feels right for you, go for it!