Question about hen nights/bridesmaids duties

When I got married no one could be arsed to organizemy hen night so I did it.

When I get married again I'll not bother as my I spent ages organising my last one and no one appreciated the effort I'd put in and I didn't enjoy it at all!

Hmm, I arranged my hen night. Maybe I'm just a control freak but I'd have hated someone else to arrange it.

My friends added in a few nice suprises during the evening but it was mainly planned by me.

As a rough guide yes but it's not set in stone or a law ?

Just to add, I've been a BM 6 times and never arranged the brides hen night.

I've made veils, booked a limo and given gifts etc but never arranged the venue or guest list.

My h was the only person I know who had it arranged for them - all my friends and me have all arranged our own.

My sister (MoH) and niece (bridesmaid) organised mine, but I had input. I gave them a guest list, told them where I wanted to go and which weekend I wanted to do it, but left the details and booking and chasing money up to them. Perhaps this wasn't so wise, as I ended up wandering Brighton in a pink tutu! ?

I organised my own, with some help from my best friend as I didn't have any bridesmaids etc. I'm not sure who organised my husband's stag weekend, I don't think it was either of the two best men! I think it was a friend of his who had a big house where everyone could stay, which was central to everyone and because of this, he knew the local area and did everything else aswell.

WSS

My bridesmaids both have young childrens so I didn't want to burden them with wedding plans anymore than I had to. Plus i'm a control freak so was happy to organise the sort of night I wanted.

My bridesmaids did decorate the restuarant and organised a few surprises for the night though.

I arranged my own hen do otherwise it wouldn't have happened

I haven't had mine yet, but my bridesmaids told me to tell them when I wanted to do it and who I wanted to invite, so I set a date, gave them a guest list and told them roughly what I wanted to do and they are going to organise it, I have enough on with the wedding plans!

H arranged his own

Mine got messed up, my adult BM who didn't end up being my bridesmaid invited 2 people and no one on my list of people to an expensive night out, hence lots of my friends got pretty upset with me and I almost fell out with alot of them (becuase they thought it was me).

I then said I wasn't bothered so it got cancelled...someone I work with heard all about it and organised me a last min one within 4 hours got 15 people to come out and it was an amazing night!

I think it just depends on your BM/Best Man/friends really.

My sister was my chief-bridesmaid/MoH, i think we organised it together. I definitely had a say in what we did/the tone of the evening (am very anti the l-plates, condoms and stuff sort of hen-do), bit I don't think I needed to. I think my sister would have done a great job without me.

I didn't have a MoH. I decided what I wanted to do and a couple fo godds friends made most of the arrangements (it was a weekend at a Health Spa).

The BM made most of the arrangements for the Stag Do, but H said where he wanted it and who he wanted to invite.

I think our wedding was a little from the norm in that we didn't give people tasks or roles, they mainly just turned up ?

I arranged my own, both the week away and the meal when we got home as I doubt anything would have been done owtherwise. (although it's funny that noone really bothered to sort anything for the meal, but when I did and the evening came I had 30 odd people. So people did want to do something they just couldn't be bothered with the hassle, where I obviously didn't have anything to do 3 weeks before my wedding did I? ?)

WFloweryS except swap sister for best friend.

We had it at my mum's house and probably were equally involved.

I told my sister (MoH) where, when and who and she did all the rest.

I've just come back from hers and it was pretty much the same. She told me where (the city) and when she wanted to go and who she wanted to attend. I organised everything else and told her nothing. She had loads of surprises that way, but could relax knowing it was roughly what she wanted.

It was brilliant and she had a fantastic time - which was the most important thing.

I arranged my own hen night, though my friends did organise some t-shirts and accessories for the evening. My bridesmaids were all my much younger sisters (the eldest turned 18 a week before the hen), so I wouldn't have expected any input from them.

I think my husband's stag was organised by him, but with the BMs help.

I don't think it really matters who organises it, as long (a) it's really what the hen wants (or would want if it's a suprise), and (b) the arrangements take into consideration everyone involved.

Mr FtG's brother organised his stag do. They went fishing off cornwall, which is the BiLs favourite thng to do, and Mr FtG can take or leave, the BiL invited his mates, the BiL got so drunk he couldn't remember his name, the BiL got taken back to the B&B by the police... Mr FtG just looked on bemused as his brother seemed to have his own stag do rather than Mr FtG's.

Best man/bridesmaids organising stag/hen is accepted but its harder when they don't know all the grooms/brides friends.

We had a hag do rather than separate dos and we organised it. Well, we arranged a weekend with our friends and booked a table at a local restaurant. We put lunch on on the Saturday and put them up. There wasn't all that much organising! Also, my bridesmaid was living in Amsterdam at the time, she did everything she could for the wedding but organising something else just wasn't something I would expect her to do.

I organised my own hen do as none of my 2 bridesmaids were forthcoming and both were rather busy (one was heavily preggers and gave birth 5 weeks before my wedding and the other lived miles away). I part organised the hen do for my friend when I was bridesmaid, jointly with the other bridesmaid but it was Gemma's choice where we went,we just sorted the logistics.

Okay, thanks for the replies. So it's a mix really.

My sister is being a complete PITA and now wants to un-invite some of her friends from her hen night, leaving it just 4 of us in total. The friends are baffled, I am confused, and the other BM is saying "Grotbags must have what she wants, it's her night, she musn't be stressed" which is okay in theory but weird.

When Grotbags arranged my hen night she left it too late so none of my uni friends could come down, and it was just generally crap. I wanted to have a nice night for her, nothing outrageous, so that she wouldn't look back like I do and feel a little let down. But my efforts are not appreciated and I'm pissed off.

Will just keep my trap shut then - if everyone else deferred 100% to their MOH or BMs maybe I'd say something, but seems safer to keep quiet.

Thanks!