Questioning venue and dress, argh!

I honestly can't remember much about any of the wedding venues I've been to as a guest. The memories that last are seeing the bride and groom get married and the conversations and laughter. So don't worry about the venue. No one is going to be sitting there going 'oh, if only the venue were more atmospheric'. You'll all be too busy celebrating and having a great time. And having outside space isn't that important for an autumn wedding - people are unlikely to want to be outside much anyway as it's too cold, especially in posh wedding outfits!

As for the dress - maybe you were pushed into buying something bigger than you would naturally have gone for. But your family loved it, so that's a pretty fair guarantee you look great in it. And I can guarantee your fiance will love you in it. And that's really all that matters.

In terms of wedding planning and the organisational 'stuff' that happens for a wedding, the dress and the venue are big. But in terms of you both making a lifelong commitment to each other, they're pretty small.

A few years back, I went to a wedding where just about everything went wrong - the final straw was when a small child crashed into the cake table and knocked the cake over just before it was due to be cut. Everyone commented on how unbothered the bride and groom were. The bride's response was 'We've got married and we're spending the rest of our lives together - that's all that matters'. That's the big stuff. Everything compared to that is pretty small! So don't worry - chill out and look forward to your big day.

Thank you! That's made me feel so much better - you're absolutely right, as a guest you don't actually remember that much about the venue, it's really about how much fun you had. In fact, one of the most memorable weddings I've been to included a very rainy outdoor ceremony followed by a reception in a basic village hall, but with fantastic Ceilidh band - I remember it being so much fun.

Hopefully you're right about the dress too. I guess it can't be that bad if my family all liked it and I didn't feel super pressured, just influenced a bit more than I'd have liked. I'm actually thinking of buying a second, more low key dress to change into during the evening - nothing too expensive but maybe a really nice high street dress that's easier for dancing etc