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Curious April 2024 Kent

Registrar and Celebrant - help!

Leah, 3 of October of 2022 at 16:20 Posted on Planning 0 1

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Hi all, after some advice please! So my step-dad is a Celebrant - he is amazing at his job and it would be so special for him to 'marry' us. However my fiance and I can't get over the idea of having to do a registry office also, and the organisation around this with gathering our witnesses, plus we don't like the idea of being legally married either before our 'Big Day' or the anti climax of our 'Big Day' but then not being legally married.

So, with that in mind, our wedding coordinator suggested we have them both! Even though this is more expensive then the first option, it means it's less faff in general! Although, we're now worried about how the ceremony will flow. Should we have the Celebrant and then the Registrar, or vice versa - how long is the registrar? any ideas welcomed...

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Latest activity by Sarah, 4 of October of 2022 at 12:46

Dedicated October 2022 Swansea
Sarah · 4 of October of 2022 at 12:46
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What a lovely opportunity to have something so special and personal with your step dad. I would suggest that when you start to map out timings and key things on the day, enquire early to find out what time slots registrars have available on your considered dates as if they can only do early or late on your considered dates that will change your plans. If registrars can do the service earlier in the day it may make more sense to have the registrar do their legal service first and then your step dad to conduct a special celebrant led ceremony after as he will be there all day so can adapt his content and timings flexibly on the day to suit you.
The registrar service lasts usually a max of 30 minutes, but can be as little as 10. They would arrive approx 20 minutes before the time they are booked, check some basic details with you and your partner separately, and then conduct the legal service. The legal vows and content are very short - what makes it longer is people adding in readings, music and additional vows.
You could have a short transition whilst they leave - perhaps some music for example - and then your stepfather could lead a personalised celebration. Alternatively, instead of 'readings' he could do a reading/ a contribution such as a hand fastening ceremony as part of the legal service drawing on his celebrant experience. If you want any reference to anything religious the registrars must have left and there must be a clear distinction between their service and any kind of blessing with religious connotations.
Your step dad or his celebrant colleagues may actually be a good source of inspiration here - they may have examples of how they have worked alongside a registrar led service in the past at various venues to help you. You may get inspired to do something totally unique e.g. have your traditional registrar service in the morning but have your step dad lead a candle lit blessing in the evening as the evening guest arrive instead of speeches. Enjoy playing with ideas and speak to the registrar, your wedding planner and celebrants to find out what they done in the past - happy planning! xxx
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