Registrar said no!!

I'm sorry that I don't understand anything about your situation so can't give any advice, but I hope it all gets sorted out soon and with minimum more stress for you! It sounds like a very frustrating situation!!

Hey blonde viki, thank you.. just needed a rant really!! Its a weird situation.. the registrar said she's never come across this issue in the past 4 yrs!! More problems now the better the day OH keeps telling me!!

Ah MrsP2B this is so annoying! Do you actually need to move home, can't you just change your address at the bank and pretend?

And your partner is right I guess - at least you're getting it all out of the way now. I think you were a bit unlucky with your registrar and Priest, too - they both sound like they were a bit inflexible about things. I mean, if you are a regular church goer and a fully committed member of the Church, I can't see the problem really, I think the Priest could have made an exception and married you himself. And I find it hard to believe that a registrar has NEVER come across this situation before - she sounds like she was a teensy bit smug, which always makes a difficult situation worse!

Try not to let it stress you out - you sound like you are finding really practical solutions to every problem! Nothing's stopping you two!

heh heh I like this way of looking at it! I'm glad there seems to be a way around it, even it annoying involves moving in with M&D for a bit, it will all be worth it in the end

Hi, i don't know anything about your church rules, but i do know when it comes to certain catchment areas for schools no one ever really moves! only on paper! go to the bank, tell them your change of address then go back home and dont worry! Our best man lives next door to a 5 bedroom totaly empty house, brought by a family who wanted to go to the catchment school in the houses area but didn't really want to move there, wrong or not it certainly won't be hurting anyone in your case.

What are frustration you dont need!

I'd change the address on 1 of your bank statements & leave it at that.

It makes me wonder if the priest at the church you are using has mentioned the 'dontation' fee for using the church? If you are simply using the premises & not the priest also, do you have the pay the usual 'donation' or a reduced rate. (I'd be inclined to pay a reduced rate afterwards anyway for them causing the problem in the first place!) Do you also need to 'donate' to the priest that is actually marrying you?

That is so irritating! I can see why they want to make sure you are regular worshippers at a church, but if you have a letter and everything I don't understand why they would be so awkward about it. I hope you can get it sorted.

The church we got married at wasnt our parish one- but the vicar just put it down anyhow that i was living at home with the folks- but i was baptised at this parish so i dont know if that held any brownie points- good luck

I dont understand - I assume when you say registrar you dont mean as in council approved that you'd use at a registry office, but you mean someone church related?

We are getting married in a church which isn't our parish, and all we have to do is make sure the banns are read out in both parishes.

I'm confused too. Did you go the registrar for the council where you live, or the council you're getting married in?

You have to give notice and get your marriage certificate from the council in which you live, but they should have absolutely no issue with you getting married in a different location, where you worship is nothing to do with them or the law. The only reason you'd have to live at your parents for 9 days is if for some reason you needed your marriage certificate from the council you're getting married in.

If you get married in a Catholic Church, you need to get a registrar too, as only ministers of the Church of England can act as a registrar in England Catholic Priests cannot, so she would have had to go to the council to arrange this

Ah, ok - as they say, you learn something new every day!

I learnt this from Hitched too! ?

Just to put a few things straight.

In E & W, any other denomination than CofE or W gives notice at the register office. A registrar is only required from there if there is no authorised person for the religious building in which you marry. This could be the catholic priest, baptist minister etc or even a member of the congregation if they are authorised.

If you are not getting married in a church/chapel etc within your registration district then it should be the usual place of worship for either/both of you, so in that respect it is the business of the registrar!

You will be asked to sign a legal declaration that you have told the truth!

Alternatively you can take up residence in the district in which you will be married and on the 9th day you can give notice.

But you can say it is neither of your usual place of worship in the meeting with the registrar. What if you don't normally go to church but when you do, it's at your parents? Then that is your 'usual' place of worship whether or not it's in your district. It only matters if the priest of that church has a problem with it, otherwise you can get married in any church you like. The only issue is you have to register in the district in which you live (or in which you have spent 9 days if you want to do it that way for the priest to see that you're normally there) so that objections can be made there.

Why registrar said .

no. he is happy.

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In this day and age i think that law is ridiculously old fashioned!

I think that would put me off getting married in church. The expense alone for both a church and a registrar makes you pale!

Thank you for all your replies!! I totally agree rose&co i can live anywhere but can't get married anywhere!! so annoying and old fashion law!!!

Onwards and upwards.. back home it is.. at least mums cooking is good ?

Yep there a reduced £400+ fee for the church then organist and choir added on top. Then yes we will give a donation to the priest marrying us (tho don't mind this bit as he's our parish priest)

Yep there a reduced £400+ fee for the church then organist and choir added on top. Then yes we will give a donation to the priest marrying us (tho don't mind this bit as he's our parish priest)

If you say that it is neither of your place of worship then you wouldn't be able to give notice.

If you do go to the church when you are at your parents house and do not go anywhere else at any other time then that is your usual place of worship.

Sorry to hear that it is so difficult to get married in England. My advice- marry in scotland any time any where by anyone. no problems. A little extreme perhaps but worth a thought.