Reserved seat for those no longer with us?

I think it's a nice idea...have you looked on pinterest? Type in wedding memorial sign and there's lots of different ideas...I like one that say's "I know you would be here today if heaven weren't so far away". You could adapt it to say Mum at the beginning. I have gone for the pictures of my grandparents on my bouquet and can't wait to have a part of them walking with me down the aisle hope this helps x

Thank you, I will try Pinterest. I'm wondering if its a bit too cheesy and should just stuck with my bouquet photo though x

It's entirely up to you hun, I wouldn't worry about people thinking its cheesy. You don't have to make a big song and dance about it...you could make it discreet if you wanted and if it puts you and others who loved your mum at ease thinking she could be sat there watching you on the most important day of your life, then go for it x

I photographed a wedding at Christmas where a chair was saved. The circumstances were a bit different though - the man involved had died weeks earlier from brain cancer and his friends promised him he would still be a part of the wedding before he died. He had seats at the ceremony and reception and was featured in the group shots as a wreath.

I'd be happy to show you photos if you message me via Facebook or my website (the message system here doesn't work)

I've also seen the cake table being used as part of a memorial and special candles being used.

I am adamant that I will be doing this at my wedding. I lost my mum 21 years ago now, and I have always said that I want a seat kept at table at wedding breakfast and at ceremony. My dad however doesn't like this idea, and i can understand why as it will be a difficult enough day as it is.

But for all the trouble I am having convincing my FIL to come to the wedding (he wont come because MIL will be there...petty doesnt even begin to cover this), I'm hoping once i let him know what i plan on doing to have my mother included for the day who physically cannot be there, he will realise whats going on. Sorry, went on a rant there, didnt mean to divert post.

All in all, do what feels best to you! Everyone is different, but I am all for it X

I lost my granddad two and a half years ago and he was the world to me, I am having lots of subtle elements at my wedding to acknowledge him. You should do whatever makes you happy to honour your mums memory it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks.

How will you feel on the day seeing an empty seat? I can only imagine (as I am lucky enough to still have my parents) that seeing an empty seat would bring the thought home to not just you but everyone else that she isn't here. May be fine for you but I know that would upset me.

Have you thought of other ways to include her memory? Favorite flowers perhaps or favorite piece of music or hymn being played? Lots of people attach lockets with photos to their bouquets or carry a piece of jewelry- my H wore his late granddads tie pin and cufflinks on the day.

My OH lost his mum two years ago to pneumonia after a long period of alzheimers. Its a source of great pain for both of us that she can't be there and I am determined she will have her place. However, as mini says, an empty chair would just bring home to both of us that she is missing. added to that, we would have an empty seat for my brother who we lost to a brain tumour and one for OH's brother who died as a result of diabetes. Too many empty chairs = too much pain on a happy occasion!

As a result, I will carry my brother in my heart and mind as will OH his brother.

We have a triple photo frame. In one side will be a photo of my parents on their wedding day and on the other side OH's parents. In the middle will be a photo of us on the day we got engaged. Others may not realise, but it will be our way of having his mum there.

Its obviously up to you, but I personally have never seen it done. Only guests sitting in the front row will see/be able to read the sign, and they will know the reason anyway. I also had 3 close relatives no longer there, so having 3 empty seats just wasn't an option. There are other ways to remember those no longer with us:

-A small table with flowers and a photo of you mum or a few photos including some of you and your mum together

- Light a candle and have it on the main table (you can announce to guests the purpose of lighting the candle & make a toast or just have the candle on there without announcing the fact)

- Have another relative read a poem or reading that your mum would have liked, or dedicate a poem/prayer to her

- Have one of your mums favourite songs/prayers as part of the ceremony

Only you can decide what you like best though.

Its completely up to you but personally I wouldn't like to be looking at an empty chair. My nan and uncle and Ohs grandads and cousin have all left us in the past 4 years so on our order of service we're having a little acknowledgement for them all and my nan loved butterflies so we're uaving lots of butterflies here there and everywhere as a little nod to her too x

One of our couples had a reserved chair at their reception for their guests who were no longer with them. It was a lovely touch.

Another couple had an extra table listed on the seating plan (but not a physical table) which I thought was a lovely, subtle nod to those who weren't there.

^^^^

This has actually brought tears to my eyes - what lovely touches. I can understand some people may not want empty seats to remind them of loved ones who are no longer around, but as long as you do what you feel is right or what you'd love to do to acknowledge them then I'd say go ahead. I personally would love to do the photo on the bouquet and maybe one of the photos above shared by Pavone.

Hi we didn't reserve a seat but on the registrars table we had a gorgeous candle from this etsy seller

https://www.etsy.com/uk/listing/192022117/personalised-wedding-memorial-memory?

My Maternal Grandfather died before my first wedding. We didn't have a reserved seat but on the table where guests were leaving cards and gifts for us we had a memorial candle (unlit) in his memory. The candle made a nice keepsake afterwards.

Personally I think I'd find it too painful to stare at an empty chair.

I think it's a lovely idea. Was thinking of something similar for OH's brother and Mum but I think OH will just get too upset seeing the empty chairs. We have favours in their honour instead.

Hi ladies, I have been think the same thing. I lost my dad 12 years ago, he would always say make sure I walk you down the aisle (mum and dad split) so will defiantly have a little picture attached to my bouquet even though my mum is walking me down.

I have also thought of saving a seat for him with a poem on, but not sure myself if that is too cheesy. Or have a poem for him as you walk into the chapel.

Here are a couple of poems I found, which have also made me have a little cry.

My little Girl, Don't cry for meI'll be right by your side.I'd never miss out on this daythat you become a bride.
I'm here with you to hold your handand give your heart awayTo a man Who chose to take care of youforever from this day.
Today, I place your hand in his with blessings and with pride.My little Girl, Don't cry for meI'll be right by your side.

please clear a spot for him;

he should have the perfect view.

His little girl's a Bride today,

and I am counting on you.

Let me feel his presence;

as I journey down the aisle.

But let me notice his absence;

if only for a while.

Let me stop to think of him;

As I am given away.

And know that if he could;

he would be here with me today.

please clear a spot for him;

he should have the perfect view.

And if he should get sad today;

Please, I count on you.

We know you are here

Smiling down

Watching over us

As we say “I Do.”

Forever in our hearts

Forever in our lives

Is where you’ll always stay.

We will think of you in silence

As we say our vows today

I think I like the middle one most but not to sure if I am deffo going to do it I don't wanna sound corny.

I have been thinking about jays to include h2bs grandad in the ceremony since this post, he died over 20 years ago so I never got to meet him but I no h2b had high thoughts of him, Due to the size of the ceremony and his grandma being quite old and in ill health I don't want to put a empty seat which might cause her further distress, so I have thought about me and h2b releasing a ballon with a picture of his grandad attached, I no some people aren't keen on that due to it causing litter etc, so am looking for a biodegradable one, but I think this will be a lovely way for us to remember him and include him as part of the day, will also prob get the photographer to take some pictures to remember it! What are others thoughts?!

I think this is lovely, I am definitely going to do this!!! I lost my mum 9 years ago, and I am going to have her locket with her pic attached to my bouquet. I am also getting married at the Church where she is buried, so after the ceremony I am going to go & put 2 of the bridesmaids bouqets on her grave. I was also going to have a collage photo frame at the side of my table plan, saying 'And not forgetting....' Obviously the main pic being my Mum saying 'Mother of the Bride' and then grandparents pictures aswell. But I love the heavens table idea so I am going to put that on it too, thank you for that. It's up to you if you would like an empty chair, but I personally would just keep looking at it & feel sad about it, but that's just me and how I feel.

I love the idea of this at the ceremony ... not so keen on having empty seats at the dinner tables .. somehow that seems morbid to me and could cause discomfort? But it is different at the ceremony - like having a reserved sign. The only thing is I think i would look at the chair and get tearful...

I like the idea that Parvonne Photography showed of the table for heaven... beautiful x