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Beginner September 2022 Hampshire

Semi formal Dress code confusion!!

Holly, 15 of June of 2022 at 23:04 Posted on Wedding Attire 0 6
I’ve just sent out our invites for our wedding in September and have already had to correct a few people who misunderstood the dress code.
I wrote semi-formal garden party along with extra details like suits for men and no trainers etc. But some people are reading semi formal as smart casual instead! Less posh garden party more casual bbq at your uncle’s!

How do I go about correcting the people who aren’t questioning it, but may have misread it. Some kind of pre wedding damage control?! Without sounding rude, controlling or bridezilla esc. Family group chat message? Instagram story? Or am I getting stressed over it for no reason when most people will understand dress codes or have the common sense to google it if they’re unsure.
What would you read semi formal dress code as?

6 replies

Latest activity by RomanticGreenStationery27135, 16 of June of 2022 at 18:03
  • Yorkshirelass
    Super July 2022 Surrey
    Yorkshirelass ·
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    I think a lady called Kirsty was asking exactly the same thing the other day and we concluded that she didn’t need to put a dress code as she also wanted to write Semi Formal. A few of us said that most people know to dress up nicely for a wedding and that it wasn’t required.
    Personally the words Semi Formal would confuse me too and I would probably Google if for fear of getting it wrong. I would usually be very smart for a wedding anyway and would wear a dress and heels. I don’t know why you would need to add any dress code unless you wanted people to wear a certain colour for instance.
    But it’s been done now and has confused some people so you need to explain it. I would send messages maybe via WhatsApp to explain what you want. I have had to explain the venue entrance and a slight change to the arrival time to our guests after the invites had gone out so if you are worried it is best to be sure and communicate it.
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  • Anonbride
    Expert July 2023 Cornwall
    Anonbride ·
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    Do you have a wedding website? You could use this space to put a bit more detail about what you mean rather than needing to message people individually?

    Otherwise, I don't think there's any harm sending a light-hearted message to anyone who RSPVs yes like "So excited to have you at our wedding! Turns out the dress code has been causing some confusion for people, so just in case this is what we mean ... Can't wait to see you and let us know if we can help you find accommodation or anything!"

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  • Charlotte
    VIP April 2022 Wiltshire
    Charlotte ·
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    I would put it in your info section on your website, where you can also put info on the venue and order of the day and then send a group message/email to say you have had a few questions from others about the dress code and other buts so you have put a FAQ on your site and would appreciate it if everyone could have a look and then if they still have questions to let you know,. That way it looks like you are trying to help then, rather than controlling bridezilla! If it means that much then you have to say it now so people have time to ensure they have the appropriate outfit, and it is your day so it is ok to be prescriptive on these things!

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  • H
    Beginner September 2022 Hampshire
    Holly ·
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    View quoted message
    I have put a note on the website yes. So that people can see it when they go to RSVP. But thanks for the wording there that helps me a lot.
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  • Richard
    Dedicated May 2022 Berkshire
    Richard ·
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    After my rsvps had come back and we had a confirmed list of attendees, I emailed everyone not only to get their food order but to reinforce a couple of key messages. Paid bar in the evening. Ceremony start time and where they needed to be. Outline of order of the day.


    So doing that could be a good way of pointing out the fashion for the party. We suggest dressing like you would if you were visiting a posh restaurant on your summer holidays or perhaps drinks in the summer on a first date etc etc... Something relatable for your guests
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  • R
    VIP July 2020 Monmouthshire
    RomanticGreenStationery27135 ·
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    It's a bit late now, but it's best to avoid dress codes (unless you are having a black tie wedding) since they usually cause confusion. It seems to have become a thing recently for couples to produce their own dress codes, and it only ever seems to cause confusion!

    Now that you've sent one out though, I think the best thing to do is to clarify by email: 'so sorry our dress code message has caused confusion - what we meant was...' so it comes over as you apologising for your mistake rather than being controlling. By all means put it on your website too, but I would try to email or message everyone as well - not everyone is going to read the website, and you don't want one or two guests to miss the message and turn up looking much more casual than anyone else.

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