Should I have an evening buffet?

What time is your BBQ? How much food will be provided per person? It really depends on the format of this part, to make a call on later hunger.

Unless your BBQ is at 7pm, I think people will get hungry, to be honest. BBQs aren't the most filling of food stuffs (at least, for vegetarian me, they aren't!).

If you're worried about the cost for your Dad, um, couldn't YOU pay it?

If you choose not to have a buffet you need to let your guests know you won't be providing food in the evening. I would be pretty annoyed if I went to an evening reception and there was no food and nobody had told me this was going to be the case. I hate being an evening only guest at a wedding where there is a buffet as it is always served really late and I am usually starving by then.

What time is the ceremony & what time is the bbq being served?

I'd leave a pay bar as it is. Although, if you aren't offering any drinks, i think it's a good gesture to offer 1 drink after the ceremony. We've been to 1 wedding where no drinks were offered at all & found the bride frustrated when people were wondering off to the bar whilst photo's were trying to be taken!

If ceremony is mid to later afternoon, with the bbq being served at tea time-ish (maybe 6/7pm), then i think you could get away with having 'nibbles' & cake served later on. But, i do think it's worth putting something more substantial on. What do the venue offer? Is hot filled sandwiches, or pie & peas, or cheese & biscuits a cheaper alternative to the full buffet works?

Can you speak with the venue yourselves (without involving your dad) making them aware that you wish to see if you can reduce costs for the evening. Pass on the reduction as revised costs so your dad isn't any the wiser? As for a possible drink offering - are you able to cover that cost yourself? It's easy to turn around & say to speak with your dad, but i'm guessing that your dad has some pride & probably wouldn't want to admit to being hard up if he's already said he'll pay. I think i'd definitely have a quiet word with the venue re the evening food & see if you are in a position to put on a round of drinks (if your budget allows you to add to that cost).

As others have said, what is your timing re the other food?

I am going to a wedding in a few weeks and they are having a buffet wedding breakfast and then no buffet at night.

The dinner will be served about 4pm and to be honest I know I am going to be hungry by 9pm especially after drinking and the early start. Also (nothing against this at all) but the wedding breakfast buffet is sandwiches, salad and picky bits rather than a hot buffet. So won’t really be filling.

They are not offereing any free drinks all day either.

I can let you know how it goes, but i would rather an evening buffet then a few free drinks, personally.

I'd much rather have food than free drinks. I would never go to a wedding expecting a paid bar.

Can you not pay for the evening food?

If you're thinking about offering free drinks, could you not use that money to pay for the buffet instead? Unless you are having a late ceremony and going straight into the evening bit, I would always suggest having food twice. People get hungry after drinks and dancing. I would always choose food for everyone over a free drink.People can always buy their own drinks if they're thirsty or not drunk enough, but there's not a lot you can do at a wedding party if you're hungry, except leave!

When we do a BBQ we tend to eat around 5/6/7pm and I'm normally getting quite tipsy by 9/10pm and we tend to crank up the BBQ for round 2! I think it's a little different if you're putting on a 3-course sit down meal but BBQs aren't normally the most filling of things (unless you've been to my mum's- she does like 5 different pasta salads alone!!!)

As an evening only guest it would be really important to at least know there would be no food as I would expect it and probably skip dinner.

We will be eating about 5. We would love to able to pay but we cant afford it, the buffet costs around £800.

And what does the BBQ include? Is it a burger each? Or a burger, plus a chicken drumstick, plus salads, plus bread, plus pasta, plus jacket potatoes etc?

If you weren't having evening guests, I'd suggest, as you're eating the BBQ at 5, that you perhaps put out breads, cheese, olives etc at around 10pm, when people start getting the munchies.

As you're having evening guests, however, my personal opinion is that you should provide something, or let them know that you won't be. I would always expect there to be food at an evening reception and wouldn't eat dinner beforehand.

This is a good idea about the bread and olives etc. I'd also let the evening guests know there will be no food. I went to a reception once and all they served was cake in the evening. I was bloomin' starving!