SO MANY dreams, but, which ones REAL?!?!

yes it is.

It was your post Elixia, excellent detective work :-)

Hahaha! I like your style Lottie! You can stay ?

I'm sure you said in the other thread that you'd already booked your £4k honeymoon? Yet you haven't even booked your wedding? Seems a bit odd.

If you have maxed out your overdraft then you can't afford to have an extravagant wedding, end of. Time to come back down to earth and start living within your means I think.

And going back to your reply to me earlier in the thread, I can't even fathom wanting to call off the wedding because I couldn't decide what venue to go with?! Not everything in life is perfect, you're not going to find the perfect venue because you're inevitably going to have to sacrifice one aspect that maybe isn't ideal but that you can live without. If you expect everything to be perfect and magical all the time then you definitely aren't prepared for the reality of marriage.

(Really don't know why I'm feeding the troll, I just can't help it!)

Now that is one of the funniest things I've read all day, thank you Peanut.

I would have pulled out my favourite Harry Potter "TROLL! TROLL IN THE DUNGEON!" pic but sadly I'm on my phone!

Sorry candy but this is a community, and we don't need to be stalkers to realise you're the same poster from the other night. Nobody is attacking you, you know exactly why people took against you the other night. Now you've come on here insinuating 4* hotel weddings are a bit beneath you, when there are bound to be several brides and OM's here who are having or had hotel weddings, you got lots of good advice but still aren't happy. Also there's the fact that your story's changing with every post. That's why people call troll or think your priorities are a bit askew...

For the last time. I'm not a troll.

i didn't say I'd BOOKED my honeymoon. You can't book for may/June next year yet through Thomson the dates haven't been released.

I never said I had booked the venue. I thought we had decided on the venue with the orange carpet, but, before I put down the deposit, I came here looking for advice about how to compensate for it. If everyone had said....I doubt you can, go for orange flowers, I would have looked somewhere else. Which we have. At a 4* hotel, which I'm now not sure I want either.

I never dissed other people's choice to have their weddings at 4* hotels. But, someone challenged whether any such venue could be "ordinary" ...I explained I meant the generic chain ones that all look/feel the same.

In the original honeymoon post, I said I was intending on putting a slip in my invites that said "don't waste £50 on a toaster, we already have everything we need, please put that money towards our honeymoon instead" - and give them details to pay any money straight into our Thomson booking (once we had one) if this was unclear, I'm sorry for not spilling every minute detail of my mind into a forum comment.

I think I've had enough of this. I've tried to distance myself from the other thread because I don't need to be shouted at and ridiculed, and you have followed me and started up again here.

I don't need this aggro.

I have often said that things written down can be taken the wrong way as the feelings behind don't always come across BUT when one person is misunderstood so often, even I start to wonder if they are being entirely honest. I think that if you can't see that then you're more than a little blind and if things were taken the wrong way then it might have been wise to clear up the wording on each post immediately. I have to say that the way you worded the honeymoon fund did come across as an outrageous request and the fact that you don't seem willing to take advice on this post is also suspicious. Can I suggest its time to look at your own actions and not blame others all the time.

Candy,

sorry everyone has the wrong end of the stick but please bear in mind all we've to go is what is written in the posts. sometimes when not all is not explained clearly people with try and connect the dots themselves and it can lead to misinterpretations. I find it always best to try and explain clearly your train of thought on forum. such as 'I've seen a venue i like but its orange.' no room for people to think you already booked it. this is just an example.

I've been bitten by not explaining my train of thoughts clearly on forums, you live and learn

If you're not a troll then I apologise, but all your posts seem to suggest you have completely missed the point of getting married. It is not to have a super duper spectacular wedding, it is not to get your guests to fund an extremely expensive honeymoon. It is just one day out of an entire lifetime with your husband. It sounds like you're just interested in being a princess for a day.

You may think hotel weddings are ordinary and formulaic, but beggars can't be choosers. You clearly can't afford an extravagant wedding, so be realistic. You can still put plenty of individual, personal touches to a hotel wedding, I can guarantee it will be wonderful no matter where you get married. Maybe it won't match the spectacular wedding dreams you had as a kid, but life isn't a Disney movie. If onsite accommodation is a dealbreaker and you've found a hotel venue you like then stop being a snob and go for it.

I thought you had already narrowed it down to two venues anyway? https://www.hitched.co.uk/chat/forums/t/422518.aspx

Perhaps you're starting to realise how outrageous and disgraceful this proposed action is, given how memorable you've made yourself

Do you have ideas about your dress? The style you like in this area might indicate your general wedding style. Cute and quirky tea length? Romantic trailing lace? Sharp and clean lines? All these styles have slightly different venue styles associated with them....in wedding magazines anyway.

We got married in a restaurant. Have you thought about museums or art galleries?

Apologies if you're not a troll, your posts just come off as confusing and a bit contradictory. I think you need to look at the venues you've already seen and liked and try and find a solution to the problems you've found rather than just dismissing them. There's usually a way round most things and no venue is going to be perfect.

So......was having a wee read through this post and as it went on I started to feel exasperated as everything being suggested was being batted away....I know a couple of people like this and it wears you down when you constantly put forward suggestions to no avail!

Anyway, by reading the entire thread I'm not entirely sure you're ready to have the wedding you're hoping for as it seems too out of your budget. I say go away, clear your over draft, save as hard as you can for as long as you can and maybe by then you'll be able to afford the wedding you truly want. Either that or you'll realise that it's not all about the wow - factor One of the nicest weddings I attended was in a registry office, onto a golf club, all done under 8k. But they'd put so many personal touches into their day and their love for each other was blindingly clear. Was a beautiful day! xx

Hahaha - what a laugh reading this !!!!

Only turns out your the £50 toaster girl.

on a serious note -

venues with accommodation tend to be hotels- not all but most . I would suggest making a list ( like others have ) about what is important to you and your other half ( venue wise ) then sit down and look at venues that accommodate these specifics and work from there x

Woah, £50 on a toaster. I'd never spend £50 on a toaster.

I'd also never assume people would spend £50 on my wedding. If my invite had that note in, I'd be pretty peeved.

This thread has made me smile. Shame the awards have passed already......

There's some perfect venues in your budget down in sunny Somerset! Are you interested in heading down there?

What a weird necro ...

All in one veunes do not have to be hotels. Some of the nicest ones near me are actually colleges or conference centres in the week and then do weddings at weekends. They have plenty of cheap rooms as cater to the mass market most of the time.

Big country houses as well can often have 20 or so rooms and outbuildings to rent. Some offer camping aswell for the more adventurous.

May not be in the right area for you but Woodlands Castle, Maunsel House, Blackmore Farm and Huntstile Farm are just four I know of where accommodation is on site or very very close by but not in a hotel.