So upset. My family are useless.

? sorry to hear your family is being so useless, panda.

Yes its really, really rude of them, but would you really want them there anyway if this is how they behave? I know how bad you must be feeling that your family has shown so little support, I'm p*ssed off for you, but at least you know that only the people who really care about you will be there.

Try not to let them ruin everything you've worked for.

Bloody family! I have a similar problem, its times like this when you know who your friends and family are. I wouldn't worry over them, I'd chose quality over quantity any day and the less guests mean more money for your honeymoon x

Ahh panda, dont be sad Like we all know, weddings make us realise who is important, and who we are important to. some of my family havent responded either or declined and its hard to deal with but dont let it ruin your day xxx

Hugs xx

OMG Panda, that is awful.

That is totally cr@p and no, you are not being bridezilla. How upsetting for you, and yes, it is very insulting.

I don't know how to comfort you, except to offer you a cyber hug and to say that on the day, you will have a wonderful surrounded by your nearest and dearest. If they don't want to be there, stuff em. At least you now know who really cares!

(((hugs)))

In the circumstances as you have outlined, I would think you have every right to be feeling as you are.

Some of my b2b's work colleagues from another office are flying down from Scotland just to be with us but most of the people she works with on a daily basis in London have declined. As have a significant number of my work colleagues.

Unfortunately I don't have a simple answer for you

sorry that is really sh1te of them and I can see why you're upset.

Weddings really do sort the wheat from the chaff I've found. You know who really cares about you and wants to be part of your day and at least you can be sure that only those people will be sharing it with you

?

Thanks ladies & gent. I think I just needed to rant with a few sympathetic ears to listen. My parents are on holiday at the moment but when they get back I might ask them to do a ring round to find out why people aren't coming. If there are genuine reasons like the old couple that have been ill it's fair enough but it would have been nice if they had bothered to put why on the RSVP card. If I didn't love animals I'd be wishing for my Uncle & Aunts budgie to fall off it's perch at some point over the next 6 weeks!

Mr C's uncle replied with "on holiday - as usual" on his RSVP... needless to say we haven't spoken since.

I understand how you feel, and you are right to be feeling a bit p!ssed off... Can your parents have a word in their ear?

Out of about 50 "no" responses, only two actually bothered to say why they couldn't come, although a few did send little cards 'with regret' and wishing us all the best.

Most people don't think they need to explain their reasoning, I guess.

Planning our wedding has been a real eye opener...

Oh thats horrible for you. People really dont understand how upsetting it can be.

One of my cousins didnt come, didnt rsvp either told my aunt who then told my mam who told me!!!!! Apparently he couldnt afford it, he has a good job is awlays on facvebook ssaying about gigs,etc he is going ot. And he would have driven down with my aunt and uncle in the same fricking car!!!! So just had to pay £49 for a hotel room, christ we provided food and drink in the daytime and we had ale in the evening so he wouldnt have had to pay for anything.

Sometimes families are rubbish xx

Sorry to hear that Im not the only Bride with useless family

Apart from my W2B grandparents, all her family are coming and they have a 2 plus hour car drive and also have to pay for accomodation, even a family friend of my W2B with her partner and 3 children are coming, also her old work mates are all coming, 15 of them

My family are around 1 hr away, and apart from my sisters and Mum, None are coming, Im left with 8 guests and the rest are Kims side 48 guests, as far as my side are concerned, they can take a run and jump as i dont want to know them now, letting me down on the most important date in my life

I'm not at the invite stage yet, but i didn't want to read and run! - I'm sorry to hear about your family trouble, but like others have said. Wedding's really do bring out those who mean a lot to you, and who you mean a lot to. It's more important that your spending the day with people who want to be there to share your day with you, and you'll have more money for your honeymoon!

Panda, just thought I'd give you a quick ?

You could adopt a load of us as cousins or something and we'll gladly come I'm sure!

I've discovered the RSVP's that decline tell you so much about the person - we have had a lovely letter from a former boss telling me she can't come but wishing us well etc and explaining it is because she is on holidfay (fair enough) but then have also had a typed two liner from a friend of OH (who I always thought was a nob) which looks more like a work letter. Guess who we will be keeping in touch with after the wedding?

It is really hard for you though because it is family who you hope will make more of an effort because of it being a family thing. Unfortunately the days of blood being thicker than water have gone and it may be that these people aren't special enough to be a part of your day. As somebody once said (forgive me if it was Clintons!!) "friends are the family you choose" so hopefully on the day you will be surrounded by your chosen family xx

How awful! but frankly it sums up what their feeling are towards you and it may just save you many years worth of xmas cards, birthday cards and gifts! If they WON'T come to your wedding and have such pitiful excuses, its their loss. One day they'll really need their family for support and they're going the wrong way to ensure that. Tit for tat! Hopefully your friends and some in-laws might just make up for it! You can't choose your family.....sadly!