Surprise wedding

It's such a lovely idea, but it's not really possible. You both need to give notice to marry (I think it's a minimum of 16 days before the wedding). And she'll want to buy a dress (I suppose)!

Unfortunately no, it can't be done that way. You will both need to give notice before the marriage and that needs to take place a minimum of two weeks before, depending on your area. I surprised my husband with a wedding for his birthday in September but I told him on Valentine's day.

Also, are you sure she would be happy? Won't she want to choose her own dress? Check my report for how I did it if you like but I do advise you think carefully

Hi Shaun. What a lovely idea! I think the only tricky area you may have is booking the registrar as usually you both need to answer questions about one another to the registrar and give some info such as DOBs, address, jobs etc, and then wait a period of time (think ours was 15 days but think this may be being shortened to 8?) before they'll confirm the wedding date and time. I would make my first port of call your local registrar/register office for some advice on how much/little input your bride to be will need to have for a surprise wedding

Also perhaps ask one of her friends to advise on what clothes she'd like to wear on the day? X

Hi Shaun. What a lovely idea! I think the only tricky area you may have is booking the registrar as usually you both need to answer questions about one another to the registrar and give some info such as DOBs, address, jobs etc, and then wait a period of time (think ours was 15 days but think this may be being shortened to 8?) before they'll confirm the wedding date and time. I would make my first port of call your local registrar/register office for some advice on how much/little input your bride to be will need to have for a surprise wedding

Also perhaps ask one of her friends to advise on what clothes she'd like to wear on the day? X

The notice period is now 29 days and you both have to give notice. You can't do it on behalf of someone, they have to do it themselves. There are special rules but these only apply when someone is terminally ill and about to sadly die

If you're absolutely sure she'll love it, then you could book a venue be that hotel, registry office etc and then surprise her with your plans with an appointment made to give notice and then allow her time to shop for her dress etc. Some love the spontanaity of this, others would be horrified wanting to make the arrangements etc. You'd need to think just how big/small a do she would want and how much full on wedding stuff she'd want. Flowers, dresses, suits, jewellery, guests, reception and that's the tip of the iceberg.

So no, you can't do it all in secret I'm afraid, but that's prob not a bad thing really.

I'm confused as to how you think she would like this when she's suggested no fuss?! A surprise wedding is surely the complete opposite?

You'll definitely have issues with the registrar/church as you both have to be there for various things.

Also, what are you going to do about her dress/underwear/shoes/jewellery/wedding ring?

Personally I think if you're going to do it you need to give her some notice and a chance to get her own stuff sorted. Bekkijane's way was perfect as it gave them a few months to sort out all the grooms bits.

When me and my partner got engaged I also wanted a no fuss wedding. I wanted to go to a register office with just our parents then have a pub lunch after. A couple of weeks into being engaged I fell in love with the idea of a "big white wedding". I don't think it's fair for one person to make all the decisions then expect the other to just go with it, in fact I think it's a bit selfish. I'm sure your intentions are well but it if she only wanted you and her then this sounds like the last thing she'd want. Also as the others have said it would be impossible to give notice without both of you being there and in England the notice you have to give has gone up to 3 weeks I think

I have to say I agree with Holey - if she's suggested a weekday wedding with no fuss; is she really going to be ok with a surprise wedding?

". I don't think it's fair for one person to make all the decisions then expect the other to just go with it, in fact I think it's a bit selfish'

I think that depends on the sort of person you are...i'm a very un-organised person and she is a very laid back go with the flow sort of girl so me taking the time to plan something like this and go to all the effort that i'm going to be doing is a huge gesture of my love for her and i truly think she will be over the moon. It's not going to be a big wedding , it's going to be no fuss really the only thing i will be doing is having a few family and friends there which can only be a good thing and add to the surprise factor of it all.

I'm not sure selfish was the right word to use there. It's obvious your going out of your way to make this wedding special and memorable for both of you. What I mean is what you say you want when your newly engaged and what you end up wanting can sometimes change. I'd personally like to be given the opportunity to make some desicions myself. Especially with the dress. Remember I can only tell you how I'd feel because I don't know your partner. That's kinda how forums work. Also when I say "big white wedding" I mean the idea the dress, and being surrounded by friends and family. I'm by no means having a big wedding...can't bloody afford it haha x

LOL, that's me! I can't think of anything worse personally. But as people have said, you can't do it as a complete surprise cos of having to give notice anyway.

I would HATE this. Biggest day of my life (no matter how small the ceremony/celebrations are etc) organised by someone else? No chance. Fortunately, my gf knows what a control freak I am so is happy to let me organise like crazy :rotfl:

^^^ is right, it's 29 days' notice now in the UK. So either way, your gf needs to know 29 days beforehand.