Its my big sisters birthday next fri but since i'll already be away to Gretna we decided to have some pre birthday drinks at hers last night. So i sauntered round to hers last night at 8pm as agreed, with my wee bottle of Rose and im thinking "i wont get too drunk since im going to the hairdressers tomorrow"
I walk in and.............. SURPRISE!!!! All my sisters and friends were there for my Secret Surprise Hen Night, which they had been plotting for weeks!!!
I was completely and utterly SHOCKED, i cannot believe they arranged it all and i didnt even have an inkling as to what was going on!!!
They got me all dressed up, I had to do a quiz about how much i knew about david and drink a shot for every incorrect answer - i got 4 out 18 right!!!
I was given a Bride to be survival pack including lots of useful stuff like safety pins, plasters and paracetamol - and some er, extras, such as rubber gloves (apparently being a wife is dirty work), 2 sets of furry handcuffs, some femfresh??, condoms, and a packet of haribo so that i can suck on something nice!!!
Then my sister read out this poem she had written, and we were all laughing hysterically then blubbing together....
"An Ode To The Hen"
It wont be long now til Louise says "I do"
She's ready with something old, borrowed and blue
Her dress is now waiting and hung up with pride,
And on 10th july she'll be a fairytale bride
For that is the start of her brand new life
A new job description - the one of a wife!
No longer a Quigley, a Conway she'll be
In Gretna, happily ever after for us all to see
But just to remind her of the life she will leave,
And give her a moment, a second to grieve
This ode will remind her of the life she once knew
Before babies and boyfriends, when she was our Lou!
The three towns Madonna, a real disco queen
Down at the Metro since she was a teen!
Wild holidays abroad with sisters and friends
She was always a goer and danced til the end
Blond hair gone blonder and fake tan applied
No drink went undrunk, there was nothing untried
The balearics, Canaries, Greece, Dublin too
J-blob went there to party - and always got foo'
Funny tales to recount, to laugh at and pass on
Like crawling up the beach "Do i look like pamela anderson?"
And lets not forget plastic chair legs a-breaking
Or endless karaoke performances - a star in the making!
From barmaid in O'Malleys to working in Yell
Shes done a bit of everything and everything she's done well
But whatever she's doing, in shores near or far
The one thing thats constant, she shines like a star
Singing in Alfies, or watching X Factor shows
She's happiest living quietly as everyone knows (AHEM!!)
Vino to drink in her jammies shes gallus
Long gone the nights spent in Hamilton Palace!
We've had great times with her, lots of memories to store
Tears, laughter and good times, who could ask for more?
To each of us all, our Louise is a star
A friend, sister,mother - theres no one on par
For now she has children, wee Leo and Max
But organised? No! She's still a bit lax...
She's never prepared and always runs late
No plans for the future - just leave it to fate
And now as she starts a new chapter in life
With marriage before her and life as a wife
Just take a wee night off from pre wedding jitters
have a couple of brandies with angostoor bitters
This last nights for you Lou, you can paint the town red
And do things you're not able to once you are wed
Shots at the ready, the L plates are here
With is you're in good hands, you've nothing to fear
Good luck Louise, We're wishing you well
Have a fabulous hen night; you're a true wedding belle!!!
Well done if you have reached this far!!!!!
