Top Table etiquette

We are having:

Bestman myfuturestepson motherinlaw bride groom mymum mystepdad mystepmum my dad mymaidofhonour

sod etiquette!!! lol x

Ooops missed out FIL - between me and my MIL x

Entirely up to you. Traditional etiquette dictates you mix the parents up but I didn't bother.

Debretts suggest:

chief bridesmaid, father of the groom, mother of the bride, groom, bride, father of the bride, mother of the groom, best man

We are having a small top table

Mum, Dad, Bride, Groom, MIL, FIL

We asked the best man where we wanted to sit, with his partner or on the top table. He said with his partner as he will be nervous about the speech and his partner can calm him ha. Bridesmaid are on one table, not having a MOH or CBM as i have two sisters and couldn't pick.

I'm going to have to mix up my parents, otherwise they'll no doubt end up lamping each other.... ?

My OH doesn't have his parents anymore and is not close to his grandparents but is very close to my family so we are having;

CBM, FOB, Bride, Groom, MOB, BM

Like everyone else has said - wherever you want them. Etiquette can be useful, but it's only starting point (if that).

I once MC'd a wedding where the Father of the Bride sat (with his new wife) as far away from the top table as he could be. His only contribution to the proceedings seemed to be to pay for everything. But no-one seemed particularly unhappy with the arrangement.

Guy

We're similar to a few folk - However my parents arent together to they'll be sat together (they get on amazingly) under the glaring eyes of their new partners!

Mum, Dad, Me, Mr A, MIL, Best man (BIL)

This is exactly what we had, but we also had MOH's husband (he was also an usher and my BIL). It worked for us as our parents get on great with each other, but if they were uncomfortable with each other, I wouldn't have hesitated to put the two couples together.

We are having us and our kids

my youngest son, his eldest daughter, hb, me, my eldest son, his youngest daughter Done it this way so the kids get to sit on top table and we can all be together. Youngest ones are as far away from each other as possible to stop messing around :-)

We are having:

Sis (bridesmaid) my gran, step father, mother, grandfather (acting FOB for the day!) me, OH, MIL, FIL, best man

We will be having

best man, grooms step father, grooms dad, grooms mum, groom, bride, brides father, brides mum, made of honour, best man

I usually check in with Debretts for the official etiquette, then I adapt it to work for me. No-one else has any idea of the etiquette anyway, so if it is wrong or right, no-one will know!

My only tips would be that boy/girl/boy/girl works well, and maybe put someone next to your son who is used to wrangling him at mealtimes, just thinking about when your Groom makes his speech, an experienced pair of hands can make sure that your little one is looked after :-)

The etiquette is only set up that way to ensure that there is plenty of conversation and that all are involved in the conversation, avoiding couples falling into their own private discussions as they are sat next to each other. If you think a mix-up of the parents might make for more silences than for chat then don't bother!

I am an absolute stickler for good manners, but I really do think that the order people sit in is not as important as ensuring that everyone enjoys themselves and is relaxed. No one will look at your Top Table and wonder why your BM is sat next to your FIL.

xxx