Top Table Troubles

At my first wedding I had all my bridesmaids siting at the top table! I had 4.

All except the flower girl however when I turned round she had been squeezed in cos she felt left out she was only 3 bless her

Are your bridesmaids walking down the aisle one by one, or in a pair? Maybe you could give one of them the Maid of Honour spot in the processional and the other the Maid of Honour spot at the top table?

I don't have a Maid of Honour either, and I also have two bridesmaids I wouldn't want to choose between. We're just having our parents at the top table, and then our wedding party and their partners are at their own table (makes for a very small top table but I like that)

I like purplerains idea. Or just have both bridesmaids and best man on the top table. Ok it won't be 'even' but I don't see it matters and isn't with a lot of extended families or remarried parents nowadays.

We arent having the best men or my bm on the top table, just parents.

OH's parents are divorced so the table would be too big if we had BM and best men too

We're just having us and parents on the top table. I didn't want to only have one of my two bridesmaids up there or have an odd number. The best man and one bridesmaid both have partners who don't know a lot of the other guests so it made sense for us to do it that way.

I couldn't/wouldn't choose between my bridesmaids either so I sat my bridesmaids, the best man, the ushers and their partners on two of the tables nearest to the top table (they wouldn't fit on one), along with a couple of other close friends. It worked really well as they all had a laugh together. We just had us and parents on the top table.

I also have two BMs and I wouldn't want to choose between them for the top table, plus I want them to be able to sit with their partners. We also want the best man to be able to sit with his wife and their baby. H2B's dad+partner aren't keen on sitting on the top table, they would rather sit with everyone else (if they do indeed come, but that's another story), which left us with a top table of just us and my parents...!

As we are having three long trestle tables, our solution is this: H2B and I sit at each of the three tables for a different part of the meal (mains, dessert, speeches - we're not having starters), everyone else stays where they are. We get to sit with all the people we want to without singling people out or separating couples etc.

I would do both or none, and not worry about filling the space with someone else. I like the suggested idea of sitting them with their partners/families - we are doing that for the 3 bridesmaids who aren't my sister. But at the same time if you want them with you, it wouldn't be odd to have both of them.

My OH and I have actually decided to have a top table of just the two of us! I think they are sometimes referred to as sweetheart tables.

This is mainly to do with the fact that we both have step parents, and we didn't like the idea of a huge top table, and the thought of actually getting a little time together just the two of us while we try to eat was really appealing!

I'm a little worried we will look a bit weird as people won't of seen it before but I'm hoping with all the other tables around us it'll be okay.

I think sweetheart tables are becoming more common. I've been to a wedding where the bride and groom had one and it was wasn't weird at all.

We were planning on it being the two of us and our parents on our top table. That way the bridesmaids partners are not sat with people they don't know. But we are having afternoon tea, so a little more informal.

When I got married the first time I had three bridesmaids. One adult and her two daughters who were 3 and 7 at the time. I didn't really have a maid of honour although it could be argued that the adult was by default. None of them sat at the top table.

If you don't want to choose between them, why not have them both? We are doing exactly that, along with 2 best men and a combined total of 3 parents so a top table of 9. Sometimes what you want is more important than what you feel you should do.